It’s a shortcut to intimacy, but it’s hollow. We don’t get to know the people in these films; we only see one side of them. They aren’t complete humans to us.
Pope John Paul II put it well:
There is no dignity when the human dimension is eliminated from the person. In short, the problem with pornography is not that it shows too much of the person, but that it shows far too little.
The cycle is cruel. It creates loneliness, then promises to heal it, all while digging a deeper hole to bury you in.
I Don’t Like Women
After the viral video of me blew up, a number of people asked how I could possibly still be single. Naturally, some hinted that there must be something wrong with him if he’s still single!
I’ve been telling everyone that I’m very picky—and that’s true. But largely, the way I view women has been shaped by pornography.
No longer am I satisfied with the girl next door. No, I want a strong Christian woman with the body of a Kardashian and the smile of Mélanie Laurent. If she could have the lips of Emily Ratajkowski and the eyebrows of Cara Delevingne, that would be nice too.
Porn has made me not want women, but their pieces and parts.
It made me crave all the “benefits” without the effort of real relationship—without hearing her fears, knowing her dreams, or building shared memories.
Without my permission, porn set the standard of beauty impossibly high—too high for any real woman to attain. And it’s prevented me from having meaningful relationships for years.
Dehumanization Breeds Violence
There are studies proving that porn increases domestic violence. I think this is why. It trains us to desire body parts, not people.
And when those “body parts” disagree, say no, or have a bad day—violence can follow.
When we stop seeing people as human, it becomes easier to treat them like objects. Like punching bags.
Isn’t that what Hitler did to the Jews? If you dehumanize someone enough, anything becomes permissible. Porn is doing the same to men and women through sexuality—it has stripped away God’s design and reduced a sacred act to pixels and parts.
Finding Hope and Healing
Even in the pit of addiction, God’s mercy runs deeper.
“If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” — 2 Corinthians 5:17
My own healing began when I finally stopped pretending. I confessed my struggle to trusted friends, invited accountability into my life, and started counseling. Over time, through prayer and grace, God replaced shame with genuine renewal.
If you’re struggling with pornography, you’re not alone—and you’re not beyond grace.
Reach out to a pastor, a friend, or a ministry like Covenant Eyes or Fight the New Drug.
Freedom starts when darkness is brought into the light.
Porn promised connection, but left me isolated. Jesus offered redemption—and gave me life.
