Home Podcast Lysa Terkeurst: How to Lead When Your Private Life Is Being Shaken

Lysa Terkeurst: How to Lead When Your Private Life Is Being Shaken

Lysa Terkeurst

Lysa Terkeurst is president of Proverbs 31 Ministries and the author of several books. Each year, Lysa is a featured keynote presenter at more than 40 events across North America, including the Women of Joy Conferences and the Catalyst Leadership Conference. Lysa and her husband, Art, have five children and live in Charlotte, North Carolina.

Key Questions for Lysa Terkeurst:

– In what ways did being in ministry help you with the personal struggles you’ve faced recently and in what ways did it make it harder?

– Do you think leaders should keep leading when their personal lives are being shaken?

– What are some things your true friends did when you were going through this valley that really helped you?

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Key Quotes from Lysa Terkeurst:

“With God there’s always a meanwhile. With God he’s always not just operating in the physical realm but he’s operating in the spiritual realm and he’s shifting things and changing things that will cause dynamics in our lives that don’t make sense.”

“My deep suffering and the struggle with pain came with an unexpected package of a strength that I needed.”

“When my own faith got shaky, I had to go stand on the faith of some of my friends who I knew were praying more words for me than they were speaking about me or speaking to me…They weren’t about trying to explain why I was going through what I was going through. I didn’t need anybody to try to explain it to me…I didn’t need them to put bumper sticker phrases on my very deep pain. I needed them to stand there and remind me of who God is.”

“The very best way to enter into someone’s pain and have an honest conversation with them is from the vantage point of our own pain. We don’t have to have the same circumstances as someone else in order to minister to them. We just have to be honest about the deep emotions that are very common that emerge when we have seasons of disappointment, devastation, disillusionment.”

“People will only trust our advice to the level that they know that we feel what they feel and we’ve walked through the deep places of life as well.”

“I’ve always wanted God to be as predictable as a math equation. I felt like I had done what God asked me to do. I’d tended to my marriage; we’d gone on the date nights and the retreats; we’d gotten good counseling. I’d felt like I’d done everything and checked all the boxes and then this upending of our relationship, this unraveling of what I held precious, it was more painful than what I knew how to deal with privately, so you can imagine how excruciating it was to deal with it publicly.”

“There’s a big difference between privacy and secrecy. Secrecy is when we keep things hidden for the purpose of continuing on in some sort of a sin. Privacy is not for the purpose of hiding, it’s for the purpose of healing.”

“I had no idea how the church would respond. There are no guarantees when you come out with something that’s as difficult as what my family was walking through. But I have to say, in my situation, the church did what the church was supposed to do. Instead of seeing it as something to judge and attack me over, the vast majority of people saw it as a call to prayer and we had an army of people storming the gates of heaven on our behalf. I’m so grateful.”

“I am a person who is well in touch with the messier realities of my life.”

“Rest is never a bad thing, but there’s a big difference between rest and resignation.”

“Reconciliation takes two people, and for some people, that’s not a choice they were given. But redemption is simply standing before the Lord and saying, ‘God, this is not what I wanted. This is not the way I thought my life would be. But I’m going to hand it over to you and I’m going to walk this path…’”


Links Mentioned in the Show:

It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way book

Lysa Terkeurst on ChurchLeaders:

Please Don’t Give Me a Christian Answer
10 Marriage Lessons From Lysa Terkeurst

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Jason serves as the Chief Strategy Officer at PastorServe, a ministry committed to strengthening the Church by serving pastors through personal coaching and church consulting. He also hosts FrontStage BackStage, a podcast and YouTube show, that helps pastors embrace healthy, well-balanced leadership as they develop a sustainable rhythm for life and ministry. Prior to joining the PastorServe team, Jason served as Vice President of Ministry Mobilization at Outreach, Inc., and as the Executive Director of the National Back to Church Sunday movement. Additionally, Jason served for nearly two decades in pastoral leadership, primarily as a lead pastor, in several contexts, including church plant re-launch, multisite church, multiethnic urban church, and an established suburban church. His experience as a lead pastor has provided numerous opportunities to coach and mentor pastors across the country. Jason and his beautiful wife, Monica, are the proud parents of six children and live on Anastasia Island, Florida. @jasondaye