Wondering how to support parents at Christmas when you’re already busy? Then read one youth minister’s insights about the simple yet meaningful gifts you can offer moms and dads this holiday season.
We’re on the brink of Christmas. People keep asking me if we’re ready. The answer, of course, is no. I’d love to be one of those people who’s been prepped for the big day for weeks, merely waiting in anticipation.
Instead, this Christmas has been tough for my family. It’s been full of stress, financial struggles, and desperation. I’m trying to focus on my Savior, yet sometimes my heart has needed readjustment.
I realized this when an ad on my car radio talked about taking time to serve as a family in the season of giving. Before I knew it, I was screaming at the radio about how all I ever do is serve, and for just one moment I don’t want to. I crumpled into a ball and just whispered, “Lord, I need you.”
When the Holidays Are Hard
I look at my kids and keep thinking they deserve better this season. It’s not the lack of gifts from Mom and Dad under the tree that bother me. We’ve had beautiful times celebrating Advent, yet my usual gusto hasn’t been in place. I’ve carried a tremendous amount of guilt that I wish we could just skip to December 26 and be done with it all.
It’s also given me a tremendous amount of compassion for the parents of my students this season. Some kids will wake up on Christmas morning to a house full of people, an amazing meal, and heaps of presents under the tree. They’ll celebrate Jesus in some glorious way and feel the warm love of all surround them.
However, others will wake up at Mom’s while wishing they could also be with Dad. There will be no fancy meal, and the holiday will feel cold and distant. Students will return after their break, shrug their shoulders, and say, “It was alright.” Their parents limped through the holiday and now breathe a sigh of relief that it’s over.
Yes, the countdown clock for Christmas has already begun. But I wonder… Is there still time to show parents how much they matter?
3 Ways to Support Parents at Christmas
Consider these crucial steps to support parents at Christmas (and beyond).
1. Withhold judgment.
First is a common mistake. We all tend to judge. We scrape the top layer of a person and then create an opinion of them. Avoid judging based on a student’s perception of their parents or situation. Love the youth, empathize, and then remind them that Christ’s love is bigger than anything else.
Remember: The parent needs that love just as much. Ninety-nine percent of the time, there is more to the heart and situation than what we see. My youngest has said a couple of times this season, “We never get anything.” Not true! We have everything we need. We just haven’t had lots of extras. And she has compared our lives to friends who talk about getting lots of Christmas presents. Remember to ask Christ to help you see with his eyes.
2. Thank parents.
How often do you thank a parent for the honor and privilege of being able to spend time with their children? I mean all parents, no matter who they are or how you feel about them. Even the parents who seem distant and nonexistent could say no to their teens attending your group.
Can you take time to send a thank-you note home to parents on January 1? If you can’t get to every family, what about delegating that task to some of your team? Be creative! How can you start this new year by letting all the parents know how much they matter? They need to hear it. Chances are, their kids forget to tell them.
