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4 Keys to Keeping Your Volunteers Excited to Serve

By
Dale Hudson
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thank you notes for children’s ministry volunteers

It’s not always easy to keep your volunteer team excited about serving…especially long term. Many volunteers start out excited about serving, but over time fall into a rut or “grow weary in well doing.”

As the leader of the ministry, you should be the one who helps volunteers stay excited about serving. One of your most important tasks is to make sure you identify and curb any underlying issues that are causing excitement to wane. If a volunteer’s excitement level dips too low, he or she will end up quitting.

With the right tools in your belt, you can keep the excitement level high. Let’s look at four keys that will help you do this.

Key #1 – Be the example. Everything rises and falls on leadership. Most often, the excitement level of your volunteers is a mirror of your excitement level.

Be a thermostat rather than a thermometer. The difference? A thermostat sets the temperature, while a thermometer just measures the temperature. Make sure you stay excited about the ministry. Volunteers will pick up on your excitement level in your voice, actions, priorities, communication, interactions, etc.

Key #2 – Show your volunteers you are excited about them. Show them how much you value them. Help them see how valuable what they are doing is. When volunteers feel valued, they will stay excited about serving. When they don’t, morale will begin to decline. I’m sure you’ve personally experienced this. Think about a time when you worked for or served with someone who took you for granted. You rarely, if ever, heard the words “thank you.” You felt used. There was little if no positive instruction or encouragement. Your excitement level begin to wane. And eventually you quit or wanted to.

Show your volunteers you are excited about them by saying “thank you” often. Keep them informed about what’s going on. Equip them. Empower them. Coach them. Ask for their input. Show them they are the #1 asset of the ministry.

Key #3 – Have fun. All work and no play makes for dullness. One of the best ways to keep the excitement level high is to have fun. Fun will lift your team’s spirit and create an atmosphere where volunteers love to serve. Think of ways you can incorporate fun into each time you get together. It can be something as simple as a quick, fun game during a pre-service meeting, a fun icebreaker to kick off a team meeting, showing a funny video, etc. You should also have some times where you get together with your volunteers with nothing on the agenda but fun. Maybe it’s eating together or going on a hike together or going bowling together or having a cook-out. You can even ask them what they like to do for fun and then go for it.

Key #4 – Show them the impact they are making. One of the best things you can do to keep your volunteers excited is to show them how they are making a difference. Invite them to the baptism of the 4th grader who is in their small group. Tell them about the young couple who accepted Christ while they were caring for their baby. Tell them about the family that came back to church because they greeted them and helped them feel welcome. Tell them about the preschooler who went home and told her parents about the Bible story connected to the craft they helped prepare.

Nothing gets volunteers more excited than knowing they are being used by God. You know that feeling. The feeling that comes when you know God has used you to make a difference in someone else’s life. It ushers in excitement, doesn’t it?

Here are some questions to think about and work through.

What is the current excitement level in your ministry? High? Low?  

Are you leading by example? How excited are you about the ministry? Do you need to rekindle your passion for God’s calling on your life?

Do your volunteers know you are excited about them? What are some ways you can better show them you value them?

Is your ministry a fun place to serve? What are some ways you can up the “fun factor?”

Are you sharing the stories of the lives God is using your volunteers to impact? How can you do a better job of showing them how God is using them? 

You can get more great tips on leading volunteers in my new book, The Formula for Building Great Volunteer Teams. It has been called the best book ever written on the subject by some readers. It is available at this link. 

This article originally appeared here.

For more great articles on leading volunteers, check out 25 Best Articles on Leading Volunteers (That Get Them to Stay and Thrive!)

How Jesus Stops Racism

By
Greg Stier
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thank you notes for children’s ministry volunteers

It seems as though racial discrimination is a never-ending problem. Here’s God’s solution.

I was raised in an all white family in the middle of a mostly Mexican neighborhood. At the time, North Denver was in the top high-crime rate areas of our city. And my family members were right in the thick of it.

Growing up I heard countless stories and witnessed tons of “situations” that ended in some kind of bloodshed. My family was notoriously violent, so much so that the Denver mafia nicknamed my five uncles “the crazy brothers.”

So racism was real growing up in North Denver. For my family it was “us” verses “them.” And the result was extreme violence, shed blood and intense hatred.

But then Jesus came in and changed everything.

A southern-drawled preacher from the suburbs nicknamed “Yankee” came to the toughest and angriest one of my uncles (Uncle Jack) and led him to Christ. That was the beginning point of his transformation!

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My Uncle Bob came fully to Christ in the back of a squad car after beating a guy to death (they eventually resuscitated him). And on and on the story goes.

Over the period of a few years most of my very large, very loud family put their faith in Jesus. Although I was a child when most of this happened, I remember watching the transformation of my family members as a result of the Gospel message.

That’s when the Holy Spirit began to go to work on my family members. As they grew closer to Jesus, the slime of racism (and other sins for that matter) began to get scrubbed away.

Soon my family members were side by side in church with their Latino brothers and sisters in Christ. It took time. It was messy. There were slip-ups. But the trajectory of their transformation from racism to love was shockingly obvious to me and to everyone who truly knew my family.

So what are the implications of all this? Simply that the cure to racism in our hearts is Jesus, and the cure to racism on our streets is the church.

Only Jesus can replace the hatred of racism with true and deep love for those who are not like us and those we may not like. The Gospel changes everything.

What is the Gospel? It’s simply the message that God created us to be with him and that our sins separate us from God. Those sins cannot be removed by good deeds. So paying the price for sin, Jesus died and rose again. Everyone who trusts in him alone has eternal life, and this life with Jesus starts now and lasts forever.

If you have never put your faith in Jesus, do so right now. It will change your destiny and transform your heart. It will give you the divine power to eradicate racism and every other “ism” in your life (i.e., hedonism, selfism, etc.).

The second part of the cure is not for our hearts, but for our streets. It’s the church mobilized to gospelize.

The church is God’s change agent for the neighborhood. It was a church that reached into my hood and rescued my family, discipled my family, equipped my family and then unleashed my family back to the streets…but this time on a redemptive mission.

And our churches must learn how to increasingly reflect the multi-ethnic world we are living in. This is what they did in the early church, especially in the church of Antioch (Acts 11:19-26.)

The church of Antioch had Jews and Gentiles side-by-side, working together to advance God’s kingdom. As my buddy Derwin Gray said, “In all of human history, there has never been so much animosity, hatred and violence between two groups of people as there has been between the Jew and the Gentile. But God birthed a group of people on the planet who He recreated in His eternal Son Jesus to transcend this racial hostility, injustice, nd oppression. He did this by means of Jesus’ death on the cross so that our hostility toward each other was put to death.”

The people in our churches must be inspired, equipped and unleashed to share this message across the street, across the tracks and across the world. And I’m convinced the teenagers in our churches can help lead the way!

That’s why on September 23 we are doing Dare 2 Share Live, a live simulcast event that will broadcast into 72 churches across the United States! Our prayer is that, on a single day, we will be able to mobilize a force of teenagers who will be inspired, equipped and then unleashed to go out into their cities to show and share the love of Jesus! We have venues from South Chicago to Puerto Rico to Los Angeles to Fairbanks, Alaska, that will be launching points for city-wide Gospel transformation!

Dare 2 Share Live will be the church unleashed to transform cities across America one Gospel conversation at a time. Our goal is to replace hate with love, to exchange racism for redemption, and to tear down walls and build bridges.

Join us in prayer at 9:23 every day that Dare 2 Share Live is used by God to be a rally point for revival. Pray that tens of thousands are unleashed that day to bring transformational unity through the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

May the Gospel of Jesus Christ scrape every last shred of racism out of our hearts. Let’s start sharing this message across the street, across the tracks and across the world! Only through the Gospel can racism be cured!

This article originally appeared here.

6 Questions Everyone Should Be Asking About Social Media

By
Kem Meyer
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thank you notes for children’s ministry volunteers

QUESTION FROM NORTH CAROLINA: I would love to know more about social media plans. What platforms should be using (if any) and in what ways? How often should we post? I am going to launch a Social Media team in 2017 and I would love to have my “ducks in a row” or at least in the right pond before getting them going.

Building a social media plan can seem overwhelming; especially if you see all platforms as broadcast channels. Don’t give into the invisible pressure to jump on everything all at once, all the time. And, most importantly, remember social media strategies are successful when they help people connect, not when they create more promotional noise.

The good news is it’s a lot simpler than people make it. With just a few questions in mind, you can be confident and methodical as you get your ducks in a row and in the right pond. Pro tip: These questions should be revisited regularly.

  1. Where are my people? Don’t start a Snapchat account just because you read it’s the fastest growing social media app today. That doesn’t make it the biggest crowd or the right crowd. First, find out where the majority of your audience hanging out. Join them there. Pay attention to how they’re using it, responding to other accounts, commenting and sharing (or not). When you see what resonates with your intended audience, you can refine and focus your messaging as a result. A big part of a defining a content strategy is social “listening.” Read more about that here.
  2. What am I doing here? Once you’re found your people, figure out what need you’re going to meet or problem you’re going solve for them. Your content strategy shouldn’t be driven by what you want to say, but what your people are looking for. Don’t make frequency your goal; post only when you have something worthy to add to your intended audience. Here are just a few ideas.
  3. Do I know where I’m going? After you find your people and identify your purpose, you can make a plan. Just don’t overthink it. An uncomplicated cue card can give you the basic compass to build a team around and stay on track. Take a look at this sample super simple social media framework.
  4. What’s on my playlist? You don’t need it to get started, but draft a content calendar when you’re ready. It’s just a schedule with the themes and rhythms to make sure you’re talking about the right stuff at the right time in the right place. The idea here is that your communication is varied, strategic and fresh. Again, there are some fancy formats and templates out there if you look for them. But, you don’t need to over engineer this thing. Take a look at this sample super simple weekly content calendar from my friend Tiffany.
  5. Who else needs to know about this? Many times, the biggest threat to a successful social media plan doesn’t have anything to do with the technology, and everything to do with people who are going to be using that technology. Give your staff and stakeholders a heads up about the new social media plan, what to expect, how it will or won’t affect them, how they can participate and where to go with questions. Remind everyone social media plans are not concrete, but an evolving ecosystem the changes with the culture around it.
  6. Am I on track? Evaluate how things are going. Celebrate and nurture what’s working. Course correct or eliminate what’s not. Spend less time on the things that don’t fit your brand personality and more time on the things that do. Experiment with some new trials and see what you learn. Have fun with it. Make adjustments. Keep going.
  7. What are the “experts” saying? Don’t look at articles and professional advice as a rule book, but as cues and context to apply to your situation. Despite what some people say, there is no fail-safe scientific formula. You should pay attention to best practices, but remember all expert advice has a shelf life. Check in on occasion to see what industry insiders are saying. Here are few infographics to get a good orientation.

This article originally appeared here.

5 Big Mistakes Pastors Make on Sundays

By
Charles Stone
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thank you notes for children’s ministry volunteers

For pastors, Sunday can be the most draining day of the week. Intense people interaction, teaching or preaching, seeing our critics, trying to remember names, and attempting to put our own problems aside to listen to other peoples’ problems add up to a stress-filled day. The very day we want to be at our best requires more from us than any other day. As a result, we can easily make one or more of the five biggest mistakes pastors make on Sundays. Evaluate this list to find out how many you make. I follow the list with some suggestions on how to avoid them.

5 Biggest Mistakes Pastors Make on Sundays

  1. Failure to recognize allostatic load.
    • This term describes the wear and tear on our body from chronic stress. Our bodies have limits. Yet, when we are under stress for long periods of time, our bodies suffer. Prolonged stress causes sustained high levels of the stress hormone cortisol which, along with an overabundance of other neurotransmitters and hormones, can cause heart problems, weight gain, impaired immunity, decreased memory due to brain cell atrophy, and diminished brain functioning. If we don’t manage our stress during the week, we will limit our ability to function at our best on Sundays.
  2. Too much emotional labor.
    • Psychologists call the emotional work necessary for any job emotional labor. It’s the effort required to put on a public face when we interact with others. Unless you’re a grump or you hole up in your office until right before the Sunday service, your role requires considerable emotional labor as you interact with people on Sundays. However, when we surface act too much, put on a fake smile, we’ll quickly use up the energy stores God gave us for the day.
  3. People pleasing.
    • I based my third book, People Pleasing Pastors: Avoiding the Pitfalls of Approval Motivated Leadership, on extensive research of over 2,000 pastors. I discovered that over 70 percent of pastors self-assessed themselves as being affected in some way by people pleasing. As humans, we have a basic drive to be liked. Rejection actually physically hurts because social pain registers in the same part of our brains as does physical pain. On Sunday when we get sucked into trying to make everybody happy (by saying yes too much and/or saying what people want to hear) we will quickly get drained.
  4. The sacrifice syndrome.
    • Richard Boyatzis and Annie McKee, authors of Resonant Leadership, coined a concept called power stress to describe a kind of stress unique to leaders. “Power stress is part of the experience that results from the exercise of influence and sense of responsibility felt in leadership positions.” McKee and Boyatzis explain that when the demands of leadership get so high and leaders fail to manage it, they risk becoming trapped in what they call the Sacrifice Syndrome. Sometimes we leaders feel so overly responsible for the success of our churches that we get caught in a vicious cycle of unhealthy sacrifice for others that leads to burnout. And often that weight drains us on Sundays.
  5. Continuous partial attention (CPA).
    •  Linda Stone, author and consultant, developed this phrase to describe the mental trap we easily fall into when we constantly scan our surroundings to look for the best opportunities upon which to focus our attention. It happens when we ‘skim,’ and pay attention only partially. When this happens to you, you won’t focus on the most important tasks at hand and will get further behind on mission critical issues. Then, you must rush to get the important things done, which in turn contributes to chronic stress. On Sundays when we are listening to someone and we try to scan the crowd to see who else may want to talk to us (CPA), our energy stores get burned up faster than if we paid full attention to one person.

So what can we do to avoid these Sunday traps? I’m still learning to wisely manage myself on Sundays, but I’ve found that four practices help me avoid those five mistakes.

  1. Exercise on Sunday morning.
    • For years research has shown that exercise benefits our body. But recent research has discovered that it benefits our brains as well. When we exercise it causes our brains to release a protein called brain derived neurotrophic factor (BDNF) which has been called the Miracle-Gro for the brain. It encourages new neuronal growth and protects brain cells from stress. Exercise also releases pain dampening neurotransmitters, endorphins, which trigger positive feelings in our bodies, similar to what morphine does. On Sunday mornings I usually exercise 30 minutes about two hours before our service begins. This positive mood benefit can last a few hours.
  2. Statio.
    • Statio describes a Christian monastic practice that we might call a mini-transition between events of the day. It’s a moment between moments when we pause from once task before going to the next. It allows us to break our hurry, obtain closure from the prior task, and prepare our hearts and minds for what comes next. Leaders who practice this can turn down their body’s fight-flight system (the sympathetic nervous system) and engage the rest and digest system (the parasympathetic system) which makes us calmer. Try to practice this between tasks and interactions with people on Sunday mornings. When I remember to do it, my racing mind calms down. Read this post by Daniel Schroeder to learn more about statio.
  3. Adequate sleep the night before.
    • “When we don’t get enough sleep, we rob our brains of important neural functions because the brain is actually very active during sleep. Although the brain never really shuts down, it’s only truly at rest during non-REM sleep, which accounts for only 20 percent of our normal sleep cycle. During the other 80 percent, sleep helps the brain encode, strengthen, stabilize and consolidate our memories from the day. Our brain replays what we have learned during the day  to make our memories stick. Sleep also plays an important role in learning.” (from Brain-Savvy Leaders: The Science of Significant Ministry by Charles Stone (Kindle Locations 1671-1675). I can’t overestimate the benefits of getting a good night’s sleep the night before. It works wonders in my ability to be at my best on Sundays.
  4. Strategic use of caffeine.
    • Yep, I wrote caffeine. Moderate use of caffeine brings several benefits including blocking the sleep neurotransmitter adenosine (that’s the mechanism behind caffeine as a waker upper), increased energy and a better mood. You can read my post here about caffeine.

Sunday is great day because it reminds us that Jesus rose from the dead. Yet, it’s also a draining day. Consider applying one or two of these pointers this Sunday and see if it helps you be your best.

What has helped you be your best on Sundays?

This article originally appeared here.

10 Books That Helped Shape My Spiritual Life

By
Jarrid Wilson
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thank you notes for children’s ministry volunteers

Looking for some new reading material? Here are 10 books that have helped shape my spiritual life.

1. Fresh Wind Fresh Fire

Summary: The times are urgent. God is on the move. Now is the moment to…ask God to ignite his fire in your soul! Pastor Jim Cymbala believes that Jesus wants to renew his people?to call us back from spiritual dead ends, apathy and lukewarm religion. Cymbala knows the difference firsthand. Thirty-five years ago his own church, the Brooklyn Tabernacle, was a struggling congregation of 20. Then they began to pray…God began to move…street-hardened lives by the hundreds were changed by the love of Christ…and today they are more than ten thousand strong. The story of what happened to this broken-down church in one of America’s toughest neighborhoods points the way to new spiritual vitality in the church and in your own life. Fresh Wind, Fresh Fire shows what the Holy Spirit can do when believers get serious about prayer and the gospel. As this compelling book reveals, God moves in life-changing ways when we set aside our own agendas, take him at his word and listen for his voice.

2. A Tale of Three Kings

Summary: This best-selling tale is based on the biblical figures of David, Saul and Absalom. For the many Christians who have experienced pain, loss and heartache at the hands of other believers, this compelling story offers comfort, healing and hope. Christian leaders and directors of religious movements throughout the world have recommended this simple, powerful and beautiful story to their members and staff. You will want to join the thousands who have been profoundly touched by this incomparable story.

3. Crazy Love

Summary: Crazy, relentless, all-powerful love. Have you ever wondered if we’re missing it? It’s crazy, if you think about it. The God of the universe—the Creator of nitrogen and pine needles, galaxies and E-minor—loves us with a radical, unconditional, self-sacrificing love. And what is our typical response? We go to church, sing songs and try not to cuss. Whether you’ve verbalized it yet or not, we all know something’s wrong.

Does something deep inside your heart long to break free from the status quo? Are you hungry for an authentic faith that addresses the problems of our world with tangible, even radical, solutions? God is calling you to a passionate love relationship with Himself. Because the answer to religious complacency isn’t working harder at a list of do’s and dont’s—it’s falling in love with God. And once you encounter His love, as Francis describes it, you will never be the same. Because when you’re wildly in love with someone, it changes everything.

4. Running With Horses

Summary: In Jeremiah 12:5 God says to the prophet, “If you have raced with men on foot and they have worn you out, how can you compete with horses? If you stumble in safe country, how will you manage in the thickets by the Jordan?” We all long to live life at its best?to fuse freedom and spontaneity with purpose and meaning. Why then do we often find our lives so humdrum, so un-adventuresome, so routine? Or else so frantic, so full of activity, but still devoid of fulfillment? How do we learn to risk, to trust, to pursue wholeness and excellence?to run with the horses in the jungle of life? In a series of profound reflections on the life of Jeremiah the prophet, Eugene Peterson explores the heart of what it means to be fully and genuinely human. His writing is filled with humor and self-reflection, insight and wisdom, helping to set a course for others in the quest for life at its best.

5. Accidental Pharisees

Summary: Zealous faith can have a dangerous, dark side. While recent calls for radical Christians have challenged many to be more passionate about their faith, the downside can be a budding arrogance and self-righteousness that “accidentally” sneaks into our outlook. In Accidental Pharisees, bestselling author Larry Osborne diagnoses nine of the most common traps that can ensnare Christians on the road to a deeper life of faith. Rejecting attempts to turn the call to follow Christ into a new form of legalism, he shows readers how to avoid the temptations of pride, exclusivity, legalism and hypocrisy,

6. Purpose Driven Life

Summary: On your journey, you’ll find the answers to three of life’s most important questions: The Question of Existence: Why am I alive? The Question of Significance: Does my life matter? The Question of Purpose: What on earth am I here for? Living out the purpose you were created for moves you beyond mere survival and success to a life of significance—the life you were meant to live.

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Does Our Culture Make Kids Feel Ashamed of Their Faith?

By
Focus on the Family
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thank you notes for children’s ministry volunteers

As Christians, we all know how important it is to equip kids with a sense of joy in reading God’s Word and the confidence to freely express their faith in Jesus. But that goal is becoming more difficult in today’s culture. Consider these news headlines:

A seven-year-old California boy received a visit at home from a police officer. His crime? Sharing Bible verses with his friends during lunch or after school.

Several high school students nationwide have been warned not to include references to God in their graduation speeches.

Elementary-school students have been told they can’t read their Bibles during a free-reading period. 

What kind of message do these actions send our kids? It seems like mentions of God or the Bible are seen as the equivalent of a bad word. 

The good news is, Focus on the Family is sponsoring an event that sends the opposite message—the Bible is something to celebrate, not ban! Bring Your Bible to School Day (October 5) empowers students to take their Bibles to school as a visual way to share God’s hope with friends and celebrate religious freedoms. Last year, more than 356,000 students participated.  

Do you want to be part of the movement? Here are some easy ways to help:

Share the guide with youth in your life: At FocusontheFamily.com/BringYourBible, sign up to download free elementary and teen editions of the participation guides. Each guide has age-appropriate activities for students, including coloring sheets, Bible puzzles, videos and quizzes—as well as explanations of students’ rights and step-by-step suggestions on how to participate.

Make announcements at your church: A parent-pastor guide (available at the same link) provides access to sample church-bulletin inserts and announcements. You can also do something as simple as asking your pastor to share a video featuring the story of a student who participated. (Access videos at BringYourBible.org/videos.)

Share on social media: Make plans in advance to share pictures of your kids with their Bibles on October 5. (Let older teens know they can share selfies.) Remember to use #BringYourBible so you can be part of the national representation. Also help build the buzz beforehand by using the Bring Your Bible to School Day “Tell a Friend” social graphics available on the site.

Make it a family event: Although Bring Your Bible to School Day is a student-led event, families and older siblings can find fun ways to lend moral support. For instance, can give your children’s bus driver a Bible as a special gift. Consider including a thank-you note from your whole family for his or her service and efforts to keep kids safe. Or take your Bible to work, and then discuss what the day was like for each of you over dinner.

For More Information: Focus on the Family has more information and resources at BringYourBible.org.

This article originally appeared here.

Max Lucado: How Pastors Can Be Anxious for Nothing

By
Jason Daye
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thank you notes for children’s ministry volunteers

What does “be anxious for nothing” mean? This podcast from Max Lucado explains more.

Max Lucado has served the church in various capacities for over 30 years now. Max is a best-selling author and has been called “America’s pastor” by Christianity Today. Since 1988, Max has served at Oak Hills Church in San Antonio, Texas. His written work includes No Wonder They Call Him the Savior, Cure for the Common Life, and Anxious for Nothing: Finding Calm in a Chaotic World. Max and his wife, Denalyn, have three daughters.

As you were researching for your book on anxiety, what did you find were reasons people experience such great anxiety today?

Can you share some of the ways you or other church leaders you’ve known have struggled with anxiety?

How can a pastor clarify and define expectations with their elder boards?

As leaders, what are some specific practices that we can encourage people to engage in to help them with anxiety?

Key Quotes:

“Teenagers today have the same level of anxiety that a psychiatric patient had in the 1950s.”

“Helping people disentangle this [problem with anxiety] is one of the great privileges of the church.”

“We’ve never lived in an era that’s seen such rapid change. One psychologist said the last 30 years have the equivalent of the last 300 years in terms of changes in technology, in terms of transportation, in health, even in the globalization. The world has shrunk. Things happen more quickly.”

“Access to media causes us to be anxious people.”

“Fear is the emotion that you feel if you see a rattlesnake in the yard. Anxiety is the dread that every time you step in the yard you’re going to see a rattlesnake.”

“For the believer, [anxiety] is the kind of fear that excuses God from the equation.”

“Not even Jesus could lead a life that said there’s no anxiety. Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane is a picture of person dealing with a level of anxiety. But he didn’t let the anxiety cripple him. Nor did he let the anxiety keep him from accomplishing what God had in store for him.”

“I think ministry brings its own brand of anxiety, and learning to recognize what part of ministry triggers anxiety in a pastor is really important.”

“In those cases where you feel like you can’t get a balance, go get help for crying out loud. Go get help—hurry!”

“Most people who go into ministry have a certain level of Messiah complex. We want to save the world!”

“Your validity as a minister is never based on fruitfulness but faithfulness.”

“Understanding and trusting God’s sovereignty—I think—is the key for Christians as we deal with anxiety.”

“Anxiety and gratitude cannot share the same heart.”

“Many times anxiety comes from a focus on what’s you don’t have. It’s an assumption that things are always going to be bad.”

“Let God love you…You can never be more saved than you were the moment your were first saved. You’re not better or worse—you’re loved.”

Mentioned in the Show:

3 Reasons Pastors Have Access to Their Church Members’ Giving Records

By
Art Rainer
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thank you notes for children’s ministry volunteers

Many pastors want to avoid knowing their members’ church giving records. There are a few reasons for their avoidance. They don’t want to be perceived as showing favoritism, desiring to spend more time on other ministerial duties, and receiving advice from their peers who recommend avoiding it.

But some pastors have a different view. While they understand the reasons why pastors avoid giving records, they feel that reasons to access the records outweigh the reasons for avoiding them.

Why Access Members’ Church Giving Records?

Here are three reasons pastors have access to their members’ church giving records:

  1. They view access as critical to discipleship. Jesus spoke on money more than any other topic while on earth. Why? Money is not just a bank account issue but a heart issue. Money management reflects heart management. The way one manages their money reveals their life’s priorities. And one of the main outcomes of a heart that is aligned with God’s design for a person and their money is generosity.
  2. They view access as critical to leadership placement. Pastors want to ensure that their church leaders, whether volunteer or paid, are giving to the church. There are two reasons—discipleship and buy-in. The discipleship issue is addressed in prior point. Beyond discipleship, pastors want leaders that are invested in the church, they have skin in the game. Pastors, and most church members, do not want detached leadership. They want oversight and guidance from those who put their money where their mouth is.
  3. They view access as critical to navigating conversations with disgruntled members. Disgruntled members can take up a lot of a pastor’s time. It’s the squeaky wheel effect. Sometimes, the disgruntled member even threatens to discontinue their giving. Knowing the member’s giving record aids the pastor with this conversation, both in content and time allotment. Conversations with disgruntled members who are invested, both with their time and money, should be approached differently than conversations with disgruntled members who have no skin in the game.

Both pastors who avoid giving records and those who view it as critical to their ministry have valid positions. Of course, church culture should be considered as well. Even if a pastor has a strong preference, it is probably not the hill to die on.

What about you? Do you have a preference? And why?

This article originally appeared here.

Walk a Life Unnoticed

By
Paul David Tripp
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thank you notes for children’s ministry volunteers

We don’t know much about the man Enoch.

The Bible doesn’t divulge any details of his life, amazing feats, battles won or journeys taken by faith like it does with other biblical characters. All we know is that he was the seventh generation between Adam and Noah, that his father was Jared, and that his son was the famous long-living Methuselah (see Genesis 5:18-24).

Despite his unremarkable life (in terms of historical prominence and biblical detail), Enoch is the second character enshrined in the famous “Hall of Faith”—Hebrews 11.

UNNOTICED LIVES

What’s the reason for Enoch’s inclusion among men like Noah and Abraham and Moses? I have a theory: Like Enoch, we will live unnoticed.

Don’t get me wrong—I’m not saying that we won’t have influence or that people will ignore us. I simply mean that the majority of Christians will never make their way into history books. We’ll only have a small following on Twitter or Facebook. Most of us won’t have a million people reading our blogs, and when we die, apart from a loyal circle of family and close friends, the details of our lives will be largely forgotten by those who knew us.

Are you discouraged by that reality? Be honest: It’s tempting to think that we can’t make a difference. It’s easy to think that who we are, what we believe and how we live won’t impact others. Aren’t we just biological blips on the huge universal radar of space and time?

PLEASING TO GOD

Enoch’s story of faith challenges our pessimistic view of meaning and purpose. Here’s what Hebrews 11:5 says: “By faith Enoch was taken up so that he should not see death, and he was not found, because God had taken him. Now before he was taken he was commended as having pleased God.”

Even though we know nothing about this man, his brief mention in Hebrews 11 confronts us with the reality that God notices and cares.

The only way that God could have been pleased by Enoch’s life was if he took notice of it, and the only reason God would have taken notice is because he cared. This means that Enoch’s life, however “insignificant” in human terms, was far from meaningless. How could there be a life more meaningful than one that is noticed by and commended by the Lord of heaven and earth?

You see, Enoch’s story of faith tells us that ultimate meaning and purpose is not found in political power, cultural influence, historical prominence or the accumulation of wealth. You can have all of these things and still be plagued by feelings of meaninglessness. The only place to find contentment-producing, peace-inducing meaning and purpose is in vertical relationship with God.

Enoch’s story teaches us that in God’s eyes, none of his children are little and unnoticed.

ONE MORE STORY

There’s something else that needs to be said about the meaningfulness of Enoch’s life, because we actually have a quote that came from the mouth of this little-known man. It’s a prophecy about God’s judgment against evil, found in Jude 1:14- 15:

“Behold, the Lord comes with ten thousands of his holy ones, to execute judgment on all and to convict all the ungodly of all their deeds of ungodliness that they have committed in such an ungodly way, and of all the harsh things that ungodly sinners have spoken against him.”

This quote, from a man we know so little about historically, tells us everything we need to know about his heart morally: Enoch cared deeply about right and wrong. This prophecy doesn’t communicate the words of an angry, vindictive man, but reveals the heart of a man whose heart breaks as he considers the holiness of God and the evil of mankind.

Again, there are lessons for us to mine from Enoch’s life. First, vertical faith produces moral consciousness. Second, moral consciousness produces eyes that see wrong and a heart that cares about it. And third, when your life is shaped by moral consciousness, you leave a legacy of good whoever you are, wherever you live and whatever you do.

LITTLE PEOPLE EVERYWHERE

Most of the impact for what is right, good and true in the human community is not made by the handful of people that history books record, but by the countless masses of unknown characters who do what’s right, speak for what’s right and influence others to care for what is right.

God advances his righteous cause by hundreds of thousand of “little” people like Enoch who are committed to what is right wherever God has placed them.

Finally, it needs to be said that above all, Enoch’s story is a story of grace. Enoch was a sinner just like the rest of us, and sinners tend to care more about their own desires, feelings and needs than they do about what God says is right. It’s hard to leave a legacy of good when you’re so consumed with yourself.

But, when grace enters your door and radically rearranges your heart, you begin to care about what God says is right, and you want your life to be pleasing to him. You’ll begin to mourn, not only at your sin, but at the evil that is around you, and your mourning will turn into action.

Grace captures lost and aimless little people and infuses their lives with moral meaning and purpose, and for these people, moral consciousness isn’t a burden—it’s a joy because grace has caused them to love God and others more than they love themselves.

This was Enoch’s story, and by grace, it can be yours as well.

This resource is from Paul Tripp Ministries. For additional resources, visit www.paultripp.com. Used with permission.

Confessions of an Insecure Mom

By
Sarah Piercy
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thank you notes for children’s ministry volunteers

I’m doing my best.

I’m trying to care for my child the best I know how. Aren’t we all? I’m trying to raise him well, make informed decisions, love him to the very ends of my human limits.

And somehow it’s not enough. And too much. All at once.

The comments started the day he came home from the hospital. Or, more truthfully, the day I found out I was pregnant.

At first, I appreciated different perspectives and anything off-colour just rolled off my back:

Cloth diapers are inconvenient. Disposable diapers have chemicals.
He should sleep on his back. He should sleep on his tummy.
He needs the sun for vitamin D. But don’t go in the sun, take a supplement.
Wear sunscreen. Don’t wear sunscreen.
How long are you breastfeeding? Or not breastfeeding.
If you don’t vaccinate, he could die. Or if you do, he could die.
He should be sleeping better by now. He’ll sleep eventually so stop worrying.
Give him a soother. Don’t give him a soother. It’s too soon. It’s too late. It’s too long.
Make sure you’re feeding him whole foods. Don’t waste your time with all those “fancy” foods.
Cry it out. Use a schedule. Don’t cry it out. Don’t schedule. Let him be a kid, do your thing.

The list is almost limitless.

And you know where this leaves me as a new mom after my first year?

Incredibly insecure.

No matter what I do. Or don’t do. I’m insecure.
No matter what I do. Or don’t do. I’m a failure.
But this problem is not an opinion issue. Or even an unsolicited-comment issue.

This is a me issue. Why?

It’s internal.

Insecurity is created by how I process the opinions and comments. Not the comments themselves. 

It comes down to this one question: Where do I look for my security? When I asked this question to myself, the answer was staring me in the face.

I look for security in unanimous, public approval. In being, and being perceived as being, a perfect mother.

How’s that for the worst place to look for personal security and affirmation, ever?

Can anyone relate? Am I all alone here?

I want to be the perfect parent. I want everyone to like my parenting choices. I want everyone to support my parenting choices. But here’s the clincher: If they don’t, I must be a bad mom.

Right? Wrong. We all know that’s wrong and we know that’s a lie. But it’s one I’ve been allowing to masquerade as truth for months now. And it’s left me incredibly insecure.

SO HOW DO WE OVERCOME INSECURITY?

Here’s what I’m learning:

1. BE OPEN-HANDED

I’m the first to admit I don’t know everything. But it’s easy to secretly think I do.

Holding on to “my ways” so tightly that I have to harden myself to others’ input is just not healthy. And it’s an easy place to get to.

To be open-handed in parenting means to acknowledge that, while I am doing the best I can with the information and resources I have, I don’t know everything. I may learn or discover something that causes me to change. And that’s OK. That’s good.

This isn’t about lacking resolve. This isn’t about abandoning conviction.

It’s just about admitting that we’re not all-knowing. Because…we’re not.

2. BE CURIOUS

Ask questions. Seek to understand alternate opinions when they present themselves (judgment free). We don’t have to agree with everything to ask thoughtful questions with the intention of understanding one another.

It shows respect. And humility.

And at the end of the day, we can respect one another without fully agreeing with one another.

In fact, when we don’t, the world gets ugly pretty quick.

Curiosity keeps us learning, keeps us humble (putting others above ourselves) and allows us to respect one another.

3. BE DISCERNING

What lies are you believing? Identify them.

One of the great mentors in my life says we need to “clean out our truth drawer” regularly.

We all have one. A drawer full of things we have decided are true. But sometimes stuff gets into it that isn’t true.

“I’m a bad parent if someone doesn’t agree with something I’m doing” is one of the lies that got into mine.

What are you keeping in your truth drawer that shouldn’t be there? How is that affecting you?

4. BE PERCEPTIVE

Look for the big picture.

I’m going to fail as a parent sometimes. My boy doesn’t have a perfect mother (try as I may). And in a powerful message from Andy Stanley, I was reminded “there is a perfect that I am not.”

That perfect is Jesus, my Heavenly Father. He is loving me and my family unconditionally. Where my human capacity ends, God’s doesn’t. He gives me strength where I am weak, and He loves my family in ways I can’t.

Whether I’m eating organic, wearing toxic sunscreen or letting my boy chew on my cell phone…I’m a work in progress. And that’s OK. Because “the Perfect that I am not” loves me, is with me and is making me new.

Friends who wrestle with similar insecurities, what have I missed? How do you guard against insecurity?

This article originally appeared here.

What if My Child Claims He Is Gay?

By
Kris Dolberry
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thank you notes for children’s ministry volunteers

Many Christian parents live with a real fear that one of their children may someday reveal that they experience same-sex attraction. Others have already had a son or daughter admit to being homosexual and did not know how to respond. One of the reasons this is such a crushing experience for many parents is because they assume that their alternatives are limited to affirmation or alienation.

Every child, whether gay or straight, is oriented toward sin, and so are you. If your child or grandchild says he or she is gay, you shouldn’t act shocked, as though you are surprised your child might be tempted toward sin, or that you find your own sinful inclinations somehow less deserving of God’s judgment.

Your child’s point of temptation doesn’t mean that your entire relationship with him or her should be defined by that. We never affirm something the Bible says is wrong simply because someone we love is drawn toward it, but that doesn’t mean your entire relationship is now to become a sparring match over Romans 1. As a Christian, you believe this person is made in the image of God and thus worthy of love, regardless of how far away from God or from you.

Still, you may be asking, How do I practically respond to this? First of all, consider what your child is telling you. He or she could be saying that this is an identity from which they refuse to repent. That will require a different sort of response than if the child is saying, “This is how I feel, so what do I do?” This will change the way you respond, but what doesn’t change is your love and care for this child. Don’t panic and don’t reject them. Say explicitly that you love that child, no matter what, and mean it. Your relationship wasn’t formed by the child’s performance, and that won’t start now.

If your loved one is a Christian, spend time over the years discipling her about what following Christ looks like. Jesus isn’t shocked by your child’s temptations, and He will not leave him alone to fight them. The path toward chastity and fidelity to Christ is a difficult one. Your child will need you, the church and the “large cloud of witnesses” (Heb. 12:1) to cheer her on as she walks a path that can be lonely in a world that too often defines sex and sexuality as ultimate in life.

If your loved one isn’t a Christian, express your love, keep the relationship going and be a gracious gospel witness. God never promises us that our children will all follow Christ. Every wandering son or daughter needs to know that if the moment of crisis comes in his or her life, there’s a house waiting with a fatted-calf party ready to go, welcoming the wanderer home (Luke 15:11-32).

God calls parents to love their children. Be clear about your convictions, but do not exile your child from your life. If we sacrifice grace for truth or truth for grace, we will fall short of displaying Christ to others.

Let’s be people who respond with grace—not just to our kids, but also to the culture at large. This means we call for repentance inside the church and bear witness to God’s pattern for human sexuality outside of the church. Our children will face these issues sooner or later, and we don’t want them to face them alone. So let’s help our children be prepared for what they will encounter in the world and teach them to love as Jesus loved. After all, what our broken world needs more than anything else is to know the love of Christ.

Adapted from Christ-Centered Parenting: Gospel Conversations on Complex Cultural Issues by Russell Moore and Phillip Bethancourt

This article originally appeared here.

The Great Value of Churches Under 100

By
Dan Reiland
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thank you notes for children’s ministry volunteers

There is a certain beauty in churches with less than 100 people.

  • They possess an accessibility that is attractive.
  • They possess an element of simplicity that is appealing.
  • They possess a sense of potential that is alluring.

When I meet pastors of smaller churches who are on fire to reach people, I imagine the house churches we read about in Acts 2. Full of zeal, focused on the Word, embracing community, tapping into the power of the Holy Spirit, practicing generosity and seeing people saved.

This is a beautiful experience.

They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer. Everyone was filled with awe at the many wonders and signs performed by the apostles. All the believers were together and had everything in common. They sold property and possessions to give to anyone who had need. Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved. – Acts 2:42-47

I’m a believer in leadership and church growth. Big time.

My foundational biblical belief about the life of the church is that God intended all churches to grow.

However, God did not extend us the ability to determine how large our churches will become. Small churches fit in God’s plan.

Good leadership certainly has a significant effect on that outcome, but ultimately:

We do our part; God does His. 

Church growth requires a Kingdom partnership.  

If you pastor a smaller church or volunteer your leadership, I know it’s easy to get discouraged, feel alone in the battle, and even wonder if what you do matters.

Let me assure you, it does matter!

There is incredible value in smaller churches. It may seem like you are adding people relatively slowly. Hang in there. Stay in the game. We all want to grow faster, but there is no speedometer on the Great Commission. Stay focused on life change. That’s the primary measurement.

I’m certain God cares about one or two or five or 10 more people who say yes to Jesus! That might happen in 2017, or it might take a long time, but everyone matters to God!

5 points of high value from smaller churches:

1) Large churches don’t appeal to everyone.

A frequent comment sounds something like this: “I appreciate the amazing things the ‘big mega churches’ do, but I’m just more comfortable in a smaller church. They’re not so intimidating, and they’re easier to negotiate.”

(I think that’s one reason why multi-site works so well. It’s the best of both worlds. A large church in smaller venues.)

Another common comment is that people say they grew up in a smaller church and miss it. They find their way to larger churches because of good leadership, but smaller churches can offer good leadership too. Simply put, smaller churches can reach people that larger churches can’t.

2) Some towns and cities can’t support a big church.

I’ve driven through towns that don’t have 100 people. They need a church! There’s a huge amount of rural territory, and it needs good churches. Good churches where people can become part of the body of Christ and make a difference in their community, regardless of the size.

3) Small churches can move and respond quickly.

No one local church can do everything, but smaller churches can respond to personalized needs very quickly. For example, I heard a story of a neighborhood home that burned to the ground from a fire. The family lost everything. A small church of fewer than 100 people responded immediately providing food, a place to sleep and encouragement, and raised a generous amount of money to help this family. They stayed with them through the process until they were able to get back on their feet.

4) Small churches can have a big impact from specialized ministries.

I get to hear stories of small churches in downtown areas, urban areas and otherwise out of the way and different settings. One church meets in a hair salon, one meets in a bar, and one meets in a movie theater. There are so many more examples, but the common thread is that the community knows they are there, and appreciates their presence. One might focus on food to the poor, and another might emphasize connecting with people in the arts, or perhaps young single adults.

These are not missions, they are churches, and they are doing cool ministries that reach people who will never attend a big church.

5) Small churches can offer a personalized touch.

Don’t underestimate this point. The impact of “close and personal” shepherding, discipleship and spiritual guidance is huge. I’m not suggesting that you as the pastor do it all yourself. Raise up two or three volunteer leaders to help you.

The point is that your ability to come alongside people who are far from God, new Christians and maturing believers is a powerful force for Kingdom impact.

We all want our church to grow.

But God can and does use small churches in significant ways to advance His Kingdom.

What is one more point of high value from small churches you could add? If you have a minute, please leave a comment.

This article originally appeared here.

Hope and Perspective When We’re Dealing With Doubt

By
Randy Alcorn
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thank you notes for children’s ministry volunteers

In times of doubt, difficulty and trials, our fundamental beliefs about God and our faith are revealed. So how can Christians find faith in the midst of doubt? How can they trust God’s plan when their lives seem out of His control, and prayers seem to go unanswered or, sometimes it feels, even unheard?

If you or someone you love has been there, these questions may be far more personal than theoretical. You might wonder: Is God good? Is He sovereign? Does He care?

When we’re assailed by trials, we need perspective for our minds and relief for our hearts. It’s essential we realign our worldview by God’s inspired Word: “All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction and for training in righteousness” (2 Timothy 3:16).

The sovereignty of God is a solid foundation for our faith.

God’s sovereignty is the biblical teaching that all things remain under God’s rule and nothing happens without either His direction or permission. God works in all things for the good of His children (see Romans 8:28), including evil and suffering. He doesn’t commit moral evil, but He can use any evil for good purposes.

Paul wrote, “In him we have obtained an inheritance, having been predestined according to the purpose of him who works all things according to the counsel of his will” (Ephesians 1:11). “Everything” is comprehensive—no exceptions. God works even in those things done against His moral will, to bring them into conformity with His purpose and plan. We can follow Scripture’s lead and embrace the belief that a sovereign God is accomplishing eternal purposes in the midst of painful and even tragic events.

Genuine faith will be tested.

Suffering and life’s difficulties either push us away from God or pull us toward Him. Auschwitz survivor Viktor Frankl wrote in The Unconscious God, “Just as the small fire is extinguished by the storm whereas a large fire is enhanced by it, likewise a weak faith is weakened by predicaments and catastrophes whereas a strong faith is strengthened by them.”

Only when you jettison ungrounded and untrue faith can you replace it with valid faith in the true sovereign God—faith that can pass, and even find strength in, life’s formidable tests.

The devastation of tragedy is certainly real for people whose faith endures suffering. But because they do not place their hope for health, abundance and secure relationships in this life, but in an eternal life to come, their hope remains firm regardless of what happens.

Faith means believing that God is good and that even if we can’t see it today, one day we will look back and see clearly His sovereignty, goodness and kindness.

In our times of doubt, God promises never to leave us.

Paul Tournier said, “Where there is no longer any opportunity for doubt, there is no longer any opportunity for faith.”

Trusting God is a matter of faith. “So faith comes from hearing, and hearing through the word of Christ” (Romans 10:17). We must immerse ourselves in God’s Word. As a solar panel stores sunlight’s energy, faith is established only by regular exposure to the truth and application of that truth to the events we confront in our lives. This is why it’s essential that we attend a church that teaches God’s Word and that we study it daily ourselves. When our beliefs are established on the truth, we are more likely to stand during times when doubts assail us.

We should ask God to deliver us from Satan’s attacks of unbelief and discouragement. We should learn to resist them, in the power of Christ (see James 4:7). Trusting God for the grace to endure adversity is as much an act of faith as trusting Him for deliverance from it.

God promises in Hebrews 13:5 (NIV), “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.” This unusual Greek sentence contains five negatives. Kenneth Wuest translates it, “I will not, I will not cease to sustain and uphold you. I will not, I will not, I will not let you down.” When we languish in the deepest pit and wonder if God even exists, God reminds us that He remains there with us.

We can trust God is refining us through our trials—and one day will bring us into his glorious presence.

The Lord says to us, “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you… When you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you” (Isaiah 43:2).

God’s presence remains with His children whether we recognize it or not. In periods of darkness, God calls us to trust Him until the light returns. “But he knows the way that I take; when he has tried me, I shall come out as gold” (Job 23:10).

In this world of suffering, I have a profound and abiding hope, and faith for the future. Not because I’ve followed a set of religious rules, but because for 40-some years I’ve known a real person, and continue to know him better. Through inconceivable self-sacrifice He has touched me deeply, given me a new heart and utterly transformed my life. To Jesus be the glory, now and forever.

If you’d like to read more related to the subject of suffering, see Randy’s book If God Is Good, as well as the devotional 90 Days of God’s Goodness and book The Goodness of God (a specially focused condensation of If God Is Good, which also includes additional material).

This article originally appeared here.

Let’s Invite All of America Back to Church

By
Brian Orme
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thank you notes for children’s ministry volunteers

National Back to Church Sunday (NBTCS) is coming up this weekend (September 17, 2017). It’s a national campaign that poses an interesting question: What if the church across America laid aside any particular agenda and just invited people to church?

“No matter what they’ve been through. No matter how far they feel from faith. No conditions. No judgment. Just love,” the video below prescribes.

The movement is tapping into a felt need pastors and church-goers across the country feel acutely: In the face of a culture that is increasingly moving away from organized religion, how do we go about inviting people to church?

The answer, according to NBTCS, is simply to ask. No strings attached, no agenda. Just ask. It sounds really simple to say, but harder in practice to actually do, which is why the campaign offers tips and tricks for churches to get started.

It seems as if church decline is a worry on every pastor’s mind these days. Even among pastors whose churches are growing. Often, we see, churches “grow” by members leaving one congregation to join another. It feels as if we’re just swapping sheep instead of witnessing people coming to faith in Christ through our churches. This is one reason the NBTCS campaign is unique. The campaign encourages church members to step outside their comfort zones to reach out to people they might not normally think to invite to church.

This might be the perfect opportunity to invite those “nones” who may have never had a positive experience with the church. It might be an opportunity to reach out to the widow, the orphan, the senior citizen and (yikes!) maybe even a millennial or two.

The strategy is simple. It’s what people used to do for centuries before we became so politically correct and entrenched in denominational lines and statements of faith. The question is what will your church have to offer when people take you up on your invitation?

 

How to Survive and Thrive as a Pastor

By
Daniel Henderson
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thank you notes for children’s ministry volunteers

The Other 50% of Ministry Competency

Shortly after finishing seminary I was riveted by the model of the earliest church leaders. I discovered that they actually delegated the kind of duties that had become most burdensome to me as a young pastor. When an administrative crisis hit the Jerusalem congregation, through the breakdown of the widow feeding program, the leaders refused to personally solve it. Instead, they led the church to find seven other wise and Sprit-filled men to take on the task. Why? Their priorities were clear, “But we will devote ourselves to prayer and to the ministry of the word.” (Acts 6:4)

I have concluded that the devil does not have to destroy church leaders, he simply has to distract them. He is launching “weapons of mass distraction” on every pastor – every week. Without clear, biblical priorities we can dribble our days away trying to accomplish too many tasks and seeking to please too many people. Soon we are exhausted and empty.

The Power of “No”

I’ve learned that “the power of ‘no’ is in a stronger ‘yes’.” The apostle’s resolute “yes” in the best things empowered their “no” in connection with important projects the would have ultimately diluted their spiritual impact. Their example compels us to evaluate our approach to leadership today.

Charles Bridges wrote, “Prayer . . . is one half of our ministry and it gives to the other half all of its power and success.”[i]  Most of us complete our formal training with one-half of our competency fairly honed. We received years of training in homiletics, hermeneutics, hamartiology, soteriology, eschatology, pneumatology and all the other “ologies.” Yet, secretly, we struggle to understand what it means to have a leadership team fully-devoted to the priority of prayer. We feel inept to lead prayer gatherings – at least ones that people actually want to attend. We want our church to be marked by a powerful culture of prayer but usually have no idea how to make it happen. Most us have a sense that we have somehow missed 50% of our core preparation for local church ministry.

Leading (and Praying) with Conviction

At some point in our pastoral journey our mere cooperation with the zealous “prayer warriors” must transition to a real commitment to lead the way from the pastoral office. Our concern for prayer must grow into a conviction that propels us to lead by example, and with enduring competency. When this “Acts 6:4” conviction gripped my heart, everything about my ministry began to change.

In the years to follow, I learned how to pray –- really pray. Prayer actually became a real priority (not just a stated one). It grew to a life-changing delight. Through the school of hard knocks, the Spirit enabled me to learn to lead life-giving prayer experiences. Before long, our staff prayed together several hours each week and our ministry become more fruitful than ever. Eventually, a large percentage of our congregation participated in life-transforming multi-day Prayer Summits. In time, our weekly “scripture-fed, Sprit-led, worship-based” prayer gathering attracted hundreds. Evangelism and missions advanced as the natural overflow of this renewal. An Acts 6:4 conviction led to an Acts 6:7 result where the “word of God spread,” “disciples were multiplying” and many we thought would never get saved were converted.

Conviction Leading to Competency

This profound spiritual advancement was rooted in clear priorities, resolute conviction and a developed competency in leading this kind of prayer-driven renewal.  God knows, we need heavy doses of this if we are going to stem the tide of a secular and hostile culture through a supernatural advancement of the gospel.

A few of the foundational principles that have ignited a culture of prayer in countless churches are:

  1. A Prayer Culture Always Emanates from the Epicenter of Leadership – The single greatest predictor of a praying church is a praying leadership team. When the prayer virus incubates in powerful ways in the leadership core it will spread to every area of the church. We cannot point the way; We must lead the way.
  2. A Prayer Culture Grows through Experience Not Explanation – Teaching on prayer is helpful but does not show people how to pray. While a busy church schedule may not always allow for the addition of multiple prayer meetings we can intentionally “build the sidewalks where the footpaths already exist.” Equipping people at every level to lead life-giving prayer will infuse spiritual passion into multiple areas of church life.
  3. A Prayer Culture is Sustained through the Unshakable Motivation – Prayer efforts prompted by guilt, a need for approval or even a desire for church growth will not last. I have learned that the only enduring motive for prayer is that God is worthy to be sought. This worship-based approach is biblical, eternal and fuels a life-long passion to seek God in prayer.

Embrace the Model, Be the Model

Today, as I coach pastors on the proven principles developing a dynamic prayer culture in the local church a typical question is, “Why didn’t I learn this in seminary?”  While I could propose a handful of reasons, the more important issue is that it is not too late to learn it now. This is an urgent moment for us to think and choose wisely as we sort through the smorgasbord of modern-day pastoral ministry. The Acts 6:4 model is still effective and a focus that God blesses.

In the early days of my journey toward Acts 6:4 priorities, I was deeply challenged by the words of Charles Spurgeon. Known as the “Prince of Preachers” it was said that his preaching was made by the prayers of his people. In his personal life and pastoral leadership, he maintained a conviction about the priority of prayer. He wrote:

The preacher is above all others distinguished as a man of prayer. He prays as an ordinary Christian, else he were a hypocrite. He prays more than the ordinary Christians else he were disqualified for the office which he has under taken… All our libraries and studies are mere emptiness compared with our closets… The minister who does not earnestly pray over his work must surely be a vain and conceited man. He acts as if he thought himself sufficient of himself, and therefore needed not to appeal to God . . . The preacher who neglects to pray much must be very careless about his ministry. He cannot have comprehended his calling. He cannot have computed the value of a soul, or estimated the meaning of eternity. He will surely become a mere superficial talker, best approved where grace is least valued and a vain show most admired. He cannot be one of those who plow deep and reap abundant harvest. He is a mere loiter, not a laborer. As a preacher he has a name to live and is dead. He limps in his life like the lame man in the Proverbs, whose legs were not equal, for his praying is shorter than his preaching.[ii]

Spurgeon reminds us that in our walk of spiritual leadership, equal and functional legs are vital. These legs are clearly described in Acts 6:4.

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After decades of ministry as a Senior Pastor, Daniel Henderson now serves as President of Strategic Renewal International (www.strategicrenewal.com) and National Director of The 6:4 Fellowship (www.64fellowship.com). He is the author of 12 books including, Old Paths, New Power: Awakening Your Church through Prayer and the Ministry of the Word (Moody, 2016). In recent years he has personally coached hundreds of pastors on location and through on-line cohorts. For more information go to http://www.strategicrenewal.com/coaching

[i] Charles Bridges, The Christian Ministry (Carlisle: PA: Banner of Truth, 2009) 147

[ii] C.H. Spurgeon, Lectures to My Students (Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 1954) 42-48

Why Family Ministry Matters Now More Than Ever

By
Sam Luce
-
thank you notes for children’s ministry volunteers

Serving as a family pastor for the past six years and having been a children’s pastor for 14 years and now I have come to see ministry to the families of a church is not a luxury but a necessity. I believe family ministry matters more than anything else the church can do and here is why.

1. A society is as strong as the families that comprise it. Aristotle wrote that the family is nature’s established association for the supply of mankind’s everyday wants. John Paul II further develops this idea.

John Paul II said the following of the link between family and society.

“The family has vital and organic links with society, since it is its foundation and nourishes it continually through its role of service to life: it is from the family that citizens come to birth and it is within the family that they find the first school of the social virtues that are the animating principle of the existence and development of society itself”

Aristotle saw the value of family without being able to see the purpose of family. The purpose of families is to show a watching world the covenant keeping love of Christ through the sacrificial love of husbands and wives for one another. It also through families that the world sees our need for a perfect father through imperfect ones.

2. We must teach our kids to lose their lives to find true life.

We live in a society that values freedom of choice, freedom of everything without constraint and it’s literally killing us. Pastors need to clearly articulate where freedom is found. Oz Guinness in his book A Free People’s Suicide: Sustainable Freedom and the American Future sums up our passionate pursuit of freedom and where it leads.

Life is a project, and self-creation is all. Everything fixed, fated, given or commanded is out. In its place are millions of choices offered to us as freedom, for freedom today is another word for possibility, and the illusion of infinite possibility is conjured out of the magic of endless choice. Call it “doing your own thing,” call it “authenticity,” or call it “following your inner freedom,” but the effect is the same. Gone is everything that comes from the higher and the outside or that is passed down or predetermined by others. What is authentic now is what has been designed, decided, determined by each of us ourselves, acting out of our right to be ourselves and to be let alone. After all, life today is all about each of us. It’s all up to us, it’s all ours to choose, and it’s ours to choose without coercion or interference. As today’s secularists admit wryly, they once thought they were atheists, until they woke up and realized they were god.

Kids need to know that freedom isn’t the highest value in the kingdom of God. It’s accountability and authority. Because we are accountable to a God who made everything, because we belong to him, we have great comfort in the midst of dark and painful days that we are not our own but we belong to him. Kids and families are running from the very thing that brings comfort and peace.

3. The best place to ground the next generation in theology is when they are young. Kids need proper theology because they think thoughts about God all the time. The question is are those thoughts true? Are those thoughts good? Pastors who minister to kids and to youth often lean too much on gimmicks and fun (I’ve been guilty of this myself) when kids are dying to know what is true. Our funny stories must point to something other than our own need for affirmation. They must point to a transcendent God who loves us because he loves us.

The problem with so many kids who are walking away from faith is the stories we tell are not compelling and not grounded in the gospel. Have fun, do crazy things, but every chance you get show them Jesus. Show kids how Jesus is on every page of their Bible. Tell them how he has done amazing things in every season of your life.

4. Give parents the tools, the opportunities, the guidance they need to lead their kids. The best thing a Youth or Kids Pastor can do is disciple parents through their kids. Allow parents to be the spiritual giants in the eyes of their kids by giving them the tools they need to lead their kids., reminding them they have the Holy Spirit of God to guide and lead them in this. When I started helping in youth ministry decades ago the youth pastor was the cool older brother who was way cooler than mom and dad. In fact mom and dad got in the way much of the time. I remember hearing youth pastors say, “Your parents don’t get you but we do.” This could not be further from what is needed. We live in a transient culture. It is a rare thing that people live in the same house, stay in the same town or attend the same church. Parents never were the enemy, and today they have never been more needed as an ally.

The idea of children’s ministry and youth ministry started off as a novel idea in the ’70s and ’80s. It has turned into something that is vital. If we as a church fail to reach our children with the Gospel, we have failed indeed. We live in a complex world where we have to fight for simplicity. I love how Susana Wesley simply describes how God loves us. She said, “He loves us because he loves us.” Not because he needed to or because we deserved it.

That is what our kids and families need to hear over and over again. He loves us because he loves us.

7 Struggles of a Perfectly Imperfect Pastor

By
Kurt Bubna
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thank you notes for children’s ministry volunteers

Long ago, before smart phones, laptops and blogging, I started in ministry as a young 20-something youth pastor at a large and growing church. I had no idea what I was doing. Of course, I thought I knew more than I did, but I was clueless.

Almost 40 years later, I know a bit more, but the longer I serve, the more I realize how much I still don’t know. I’ve invested my life in the study and teaching of the Word, in the pursuit of better leadership, and in the care of people, and the only thing I know for certain is that I’m still a student. Still learning. Still growing. Still far from perfect.

We (and I use the “royal we” meaning, me too) pastors are a curious lot.

Here are seven ways we struggle:

  1. We would take a bullet for our parishioners, lay our lives down for those we serve, painfully aware, however, that the bullet may come from someone we love.
  2. We pour ourselves into the preparation of a weekly message because we believe in the power of the Word to transform lives. Still we realize that maybe half of our congregation will choose something other than church this weekend.
  3. We know God is good, faithful and sovereign, yet we worry too much about numbers, budgets and money.
  4. We do our best to be compassionate and caring. We endeavor to be patient and kind, but sometimes we struggle with the decisions our members make. More than most people understand, we feel the pain of disappointment because we tend to blame ourselves when someone in our care goes sideways. We think, If only I’d done more. If only I were a better pastor.
  5. We work long days and long weeks while struggling to create margin and to find Sabbath rest in our schedules (even when I’m off, I often think about work). But if you asked most of us, we would say, “It is an honor to serve, and what I do is a labor of love.”
  6. We wrestle with insecurity and a tendency to be people-pleasers. Most employees dread or at least worry about annual work evaluations. As pastors, we are evaluated. Every week new people are deciding to return or not, in large part, based on the pastor’s “performance.” Every week our regular attenders and members are evaluating us too, which is why we desire, more than we should, an “atta-boy” or at least a smile from someone as they walk out the church doors.
  7. We are visionaries and dreamers who sometimes struggle with how to get from here to there. We know Jesus is building his church, and we know he has chosen to partner with us, but we regularly wonder, “What’s next?” And we often have no idea.

Despite my struggles, many imperfections and frequent mistakes, given the opportunity for a career do-over, I would take the same path.

As a freshman in college, I made a choice. I chose to set aside my fears about pastoring (as a pastor’s kid, I had some baggage). I chose to overcome my terror of public speaking. I chose to take a path that would never lead me to financial wealth. I chose this life.

And yes, I would choose to be a pastor again.

But in reality, God chose me—a flawed, imperfect and broken vessel—because he delights in showing himself strong through the weak, like me—and you.

How cool. How amazing. How just like our God.

This article originally appeared here.

The Back to School Conversations You Need to Have With Your Kids

By
Jonathan McKee
-
thank you notes for children’s ministry volunteers

Tired of back to school conversations that end with one-word answers from your kids? If your kids aren’t already back to school, they’re headed there. Sure that means new classes, homework and all that goes along with the academic aspects of school…but that also means navigating new and old friendships, trying to fit in and wondering if everyone likes you, not just at school, but also on every app with a like button.

This is where you come in. The typical response from caring adults like parents, grandparents, coaches and youth pastors is to ask these questions for back to school conversations:

How was school today?

How are your classes?

Have any homework?

If you want to see the kids’ perspective on what this parental “checking in” feels like, just watch the first few episodes of Netflix’s 13 Reasons Why. The parents weren’t bad, but they weren’t asking the right questions.

So what are the right questions for back to school conversations?

It’s not always the questions—it’s the attitude behind the questions. When you ask a kid, “How was your day?” what do they hear? Do they hear…

I’m asking about your day because I feel like I probably should ask you something.

Are you doing what you’re supposed to be doing, because if not, then you’re in trouble.

I want to know about your day if you can summarize it in one sentence.

What do you want them to hear from you?

I really want to know about your day because I really care.

I care more about how you feel than how much homework you have.

I’m here to listen…really.

So how can you communicate this?

In one of my parenting workshops, a dad shared a fascinating story about a relationship-changing conversation he had with his daughter. His daughter came in to the kitchen where he was sitting at the table working—doing bills—and she asked him a question. He admitted that his typical response would be to answer without even looking up from his bills…but for some bizarre reason he didn’t do that this time. Instead, he physically took his arm and swept away all the bills from the table in front of him, gave her his full attention and answered her.

This gesture catalyzed an abnormal response from her—perhaps the sliding away of the bills was a subconscious invite of sorts. Apparently she accepted because she sat down and began talking. And they talked like they had never talked before. He said the conversation was truly game-changing in their relationship.

I tried it, and I’ll be honest, it doesn’t work every time. Sometimes your kids will answer, then about-face and leave you there with your bills.

But guess what?

About 1 in 3 times my kids will accept the subconscious invitation.

Try it. Use the Jedi-mind trick when you sit down with your kids. Make everything in your body communicate, “I’m here for you and I really want to listen to you. I don’t want to just have surface conversation.”

Use cheats if you need to…anything to get them talking and you listening. Just make an effort to communicate your desire to know them and listen.

Today’s teens might not always act like it, but they would really love it if they had someone willing to listen.

Will you be that person?

Jonathan McKee is the president of The Source for Youth Ministry, is the author of over twenty books including the brand new If I Had a Parenting Do Over, 52 Ways to Connect with Your Smartphone Obsessed Kid; Sex Matters; The Amazon Best Seller – The Guy’s Guide to God, Girls and the Phone in Your Pocket; and youth ministry books like Ministry By Teenagers; Connect; and the 10-Minute Talks series. He has over 20 years youth ministry experience and speaks to parents and leaders worldwide, all while providing free resources for youth workers and parents on his websites, TheSource4YM.com and TheSource4Parents.com. You can follow Jonathan on his blog, getting a regular dose of youth culture and parenting help. Jonathan, his wife, Lori, and their three kids live in California.

This article about back to school conversations originally appeared here.

5 Good Reasons a Church Should Close

By
Carey Nieuwhof
-
thank you notes for children’s ministry volunteers

None of us likes to hear about a church closing, but it’s no secret that thousands of churches close every year.

Every time I hear of a church closing, my heart sinks. Despite the voices of all of the critics, I really do believe the local church is a beacon of light in a world that’s increasingly dark.

In light of the fact that I have a strong bias toward seeing churches grow and flourish, are there ever reasons a church should close?

Sadly, I think there are.

I began ministry in three little churches that were fairly close to death. One of them maybe had a year left.

By God’s grace, we saw a tremendous turnaround and began to reach new families and see people come to faith.

What was needed in many ways was a heart transplant. It’s not that people didn’t have good hearts, it’s that the church had lost its heart. It no longer had a burning sense of mission.

Once we rediscovered the church’s mission, things began to change dramatically.

That’s my wish for every church. But sadly, it doesn’t happen nearly enough.

So how do you know the end is near? When should a church close?

Good Reasons for a Church Closing

Here are five good reasons a church should throw in the towel and close its doors if it doesn’t want to change.

1. The Real Mission Is Lost

Once you begin to lose momentum as a church, it’s so easy to go into survival mode.

And part of that is understandable. You’re trying to keep the doors open, not lay off staff and preserve the progress you’ve made so far. But it’s also easy to lose focus on the mission in that process.

How to Beat Small Group Burnout

By
Allen White
-
thank you notes for children’s ministry volunteers

Elijah called down fire from Heaven (1 Kings 18).

Moses insisted he was the only one who could serve the people and that the people liked coming to him (Exodus 18:15). Basically, Moses was co-dependent on the people of God. It made him feel good. But one detail from this account shows why it wasn’t good: Moses’ wife, Zipporah, and his sons were living with Jethro. Moses’ busyness for God had separated him from his family. This was not good.

Elijah did exactly what God had directed him to do. With God’s power and direction, Elijah defeated the prophets of Baal. The result was not a big celebration. The outcome was a manhunt, and Elijah was that man. Jezebel wanted his head (1 Kings 19:2). You would think that doing God’s work would be rewarded in better ways. Elijah survived for another day, but he was exhausted, depressed and ready to cash it in. You can avoid burnout in ministry, but you need to start before the fuse has burned to the end.

1. Pass around the leadership. As the small group leader, you can give away the leadership on practically every aspect of your group: leading discussions, opening your home, bringing refreshments, taking prayer requests, following up on new members and absentees, planning social events, pursuing outreach opportunities, recruiting new members—and almost everything else can be given to a member of your group. The only thing a leader can’t give away is the responsibility for the group. It’s up to you to make sure things get done but not to do everything yourself. It might be easier to do it yourself. You might like doing it yourself. But OK, Moses, don’t go there.

2. Balance the other parts of your life. What else are you doing right now? Most of us need to work at a job and/or at home. We raise our kids. Some of us homeschool our kids. Then, there are kids’ sports—boy, that can quickly take over your life.

Beyond activity, you need to consider what changes have taken place? What is new this year: a job, a home, a baby, reduced income, Cub Scouts, a major health issue? We can only tolerate so much change at a time. Fortunately, God made time so everything wouldn’t have to happen all at once. Many things you have absolutely no control over. But if you are feeling the stress of change, then opt out of optional changes for now. That doesn’t mean putting off taking that class or losing weight or buying a new car forever, but put it off for now. Maybe wait a year.

3. A co-leader is a cure. Who really cares about your group? Who’s there every week and calls when they can’t make it? Who has shown the ability to lead? A co-leader can bring some welcomed relief when life gets to be too much. Everyone needs to take a break once in a while. That doesn’t necessarily mean you quit attending your group, but maybe you go through a season when you let your co-leader take the lead. The big key here is communication. Make sure you are on the same page with the direction and focus of the group. That’s not to say your way is the only way, but people joined your group for a certain reason. If your group’s purpose radically changes, then your group might not tolerate it. Shared leadership requires shared vision.

4. Take a Break. If you find yourself at your wit’s end, you need to take a break. If you are burned out, tired, frustrated or experiencing health problems, start by focusing on your physical well-being. Get enough sleep. Eat right. Get a little exercise. Stepping out of your group will allow you two more hours in the week to do these things. If you don’t feel well physically, you won’t feel well emotionally or spiritually either.

Once you feel a little more rested, focus on your emotional health. How’s your attitude? Do you find yourself scowling or laughing? Are you hopeful or hopeless? On a scale of 1 to 10, where is your cynicism these days? Find a way to do some things for yourself. Take a walk. Watch a movie. Invest in your relationships. Hours of television will only slow your recovery. Honest conversations will revive your soul.

Now, this might seem completely backward, but your spiritual health comes last. I used to think: “Lord, I’m doing your work. I’m tired. I’m burned out. I’m frustrated. Give me supernatural strength to rise above the situation I’ve created for myself by too many late nights, poor nutrition and taking on too much. It’s all for you, God. Help me, so I can help you.” God’s response was usually something like, “Oh, give me a break.” God won’t bail you (or me) out and reinforce our bad behavior. Constantly violating God’s design is a sure path to burnout.

God designed us to work hard. God designed us to rest. God designed us for relationship with Him and with others. God designed us for a purpose. God designed us to be fragile (clay pots). Lives are best lived with an ebb and flow. We apply effort and energy, and then we take a break and rest.

The reason you feel physically tired and emotionally negative after a group meeting is your body, your system, is telling you it’s time to get out of group leader/Mr. or Ms. Hospitality mode and relax. It’s not a time to evaluate your performance as a group leader. It’s not a time to consider quitting the group or slitting your wrists. It’s time to rest. Leave behind the mess you can tolerate (more on OCD another day). If another member is hosting, then you can just go home and not worry about it.

I’ve heard ministry leaders say, “I’d rather burn out than rust out.” I don’t think either is a very good option. It’s better for us to wear out gradually.

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