Reactionary parenting is sometimes all we’ve got.
With culture changing SO RAPIDLY all around us, it’s so hard to stay in front of where our children are going.
The snowball rolling down the mountain that is social media isn’t going to slow down. It’s not. And you know what? It’s OK.
You don’t have to know the difference between an Insta and a Finsta.
Our kids are going to understand it better than us in no time.
And many of them do already.
We don’t have to understand the technology better than they do.
We simply have to understand THEM.
Here Are Three Keys to Making Your Kids Feel Better Than a Selfie.
- Be Their First Selfie Like.
Selfies. What a freaking Love/Hate relationship we have with them.
Post a picture of yourself and have the world tell you how beautiful you are…
I do it. But only at the right angle.
Your tween is gonna do it.
Your teen is gonna do it.
Honestly, your 8-year-old is gonna do it cause they see YOU do it.
They are going to pucker their lips or crooked smile.
They want to be beautiful.
So you know what I do?
I HELP my daughter take them.
I take them with her.
I tell her how gorgeous she is.
I tell her when I think a pic may be inappropriate.
I tell her that by making that one face, maybe people will think she is being sexy.
I tell her by making that other face, people will think her smile is gorgeous.
I tell her that she should not be ashamed of how beautiful she is and to make sure that she is using her beauty to make other people feel beautiful.
I tell her that her beauty has the potential to help or hurt the world.
She is responsible to match her outer beauty to her inner one.
And when they do post that inappropriate selfie… DON’T FREAK OUT.
Take them on a date, wrap them in love, and talk to them about it over a scone and latte as opposed to a text message.
- Show Off Their Guts
Use YOUR FEED to talk about how beautiful they are on the INSIDE.
It’s so easy to fill our posts up with beautiful pictures of our kids and their over the top hipster outfits.
We dress Losiah to the nines. It’s OK.
But make sure that when they read your feed, it is not just showing off beautiful pictures of them.
Talk about WHO they are more than WHAT they are.
If your kids can’t read yet…they WILL be able to read.
And when they do…
Let them know how amazing they are INSIDE and out.
- Stop Selfie Shame
We work out so that people compliment our physique.
We wear certain outfits so that people notice our style.
We filter our sunset pictures so that people think it looked better than it actually did.
We have been taking selfies for years…we just weren’t calling them selfies.
Awareness is always the key.
It’s not a stretch to say that most people who have more selfies in their timelines than anything else are seeking to be emotionally filled because they are lacking that in real life.
It’s OBVIOUS people. (I talk about this in my upcoming book.)
When I look at my 2011 Instagram timeline it was OBVIOUS I was in a sad place.
More airport bathroom selfies than a bathroom selfie runway model.
But just because one posts a selfie DOES NOT MEAN THEY ARE SUFFERING FROM A LACK OF SELF-WORTH.
A few here and there are just fine.
For the love, if you feel good, and look good, SHOW ME!
Give your kids a selfie hammer to put up the right images as opposed to a jackhammer to destroy all their images.
It’s better that way…
This article originally appeared here.