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Are We Missing the Point of Suffering?

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What really is the point of suffering?

Cancer is never fair, but it seems especially cruel when it strikes a child. Deborah, a mother, brought her two-year-old son David to Boston’s Massachusetts General Hospital a few years ago. There, a pediatric oncologist named Dr. John Truman informed them that David had leukemia and provided a devastating prognosis: David had “a 50-50 possibility of making it through this.”

After that, there were a lot of visits, with blood tests, scans, shots, and intravenous drugs. Through everything, David won’t ever cry. Even though his “friends” at the clinic had to pierce him with needles and give him painful treatments, David always ran into the clinic before his mother, smiling at the celebrity welcome he always got from the nurses.

David had a spinal tap, which is a painful procedure at any age, but especially when you are three. Deborah advised him, “If it hurts, remember that it is because Dr. Truman loves you and wants you to get better.”

The process was terrible. It took three attendants to keep David still as he hollered, wailed, and battled.

After is was over, the little boy gasped as he looked at his doctor, drenched in tears and sweat and said, “Thank you, Dr. Tooman, for hurting me.” He understood that the pain brought hope and help for his future. He hurt David to care for him.

Are We Missing the Point of Suffering?

Our Perspective on Suffering Matters

One must have a child’s faith and a lion’s strength to overcome difficulties. Whatever suffering God permits in our life, we seldom pivot to say, “Thank you, O Lord, for permitting me torment.” However, Paul and Peter, the apostles, stated that trials reveal our true character (see James 1 or Romans 4). Our faith in God is tested when we suffer: “For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow” (James 1:3).

You probably have a trial coming up right now that you would rather avoid. If not, you either have previously or will fin the future. Life is loaded with conditions that test our endurance and stretch our confidence.

Help Your Creatives Discover Team Greatness

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There are a million books, websites, and conferences out there on how to be a great leader. When it comes to leading creative people, things start to thin out a bit. When dealing with creative teams, some leaders feel the need to be experts in the area they lead, others are convinced that holding high standards is the secret, and still, others think organizational expertise is the key. But the real key is team greatness.

Help Your Creatives Discover Team Greatness

But when it comes to leading great creative teams, let me share a little advice from one of the best: Walt Disney. This quote ran in National Geographic in 1963 in a story called “The Magic Worlds of Walt Disney” – 

“You know, I was stumped one day when a little boy asked, “Do you draw Mickey Mouse?” I had to admit I do not draw anymore. “Then you think up all the jokes and ideas?” “No,” I said. “I don’t do that.” Finally, he looked at me and said, “Mr. Disney, just what do you do?”

“Well,” I said, “sometimes I think of myself as a little bee. I go from one area of the studio to another and gather pollen and sort of stimulate everybody.” I guess that’s the job I do. I certainly don’t consider myself a businessman, and I never did believe I was worth anything as an artist.”

Your #1 job as a leader of creative people is to inspire. Never forget that. It’s not your job to design the logoshoot the videowrite the scriptcompose the music, or micromanage — it’s team greatness.

It’s your job to make everyone better at theirs.

 

This article on team greatness originally appeared here, and is used by permission.

Fired from Youth Ministry: 10 Ways to Get Booted From Your Job

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Are you at risk of getting fired? Is your youth ministry job secure? Here’s a surprising rundown of 10 “sins” that’ll get you the hook.

Losing a job is no fun. Just ask a youth leader or church worker who’s been through it. After years in youth ministry, I’ve seen enough to know what it takes to get fired. Avoid these mistakes, and you’ll have a shot at enjoying a long ride at your church.

You’re Fired! 10 Ways to Lose a Youth Ministry Job

1. Whiffing on the “no-brainer.”

The quickest way to get fired is simple: Don’t do the job the church hired you to do. The search committee (or church staffer) who created the job description has a determined idea of what the church needs in a youth pastor.

So the first thing you should ask in an interview is, “Can I do the job as it’s described?” The second question should be, “Do I want to do the job as it’s described?” If the answer is “yes” to both, then you’ve got a green light until the next intersection.

2. Playing fast and loose with sexual boundaries.

Be fanatically above reproach with all things sexual. A youth pastor friend told me he’d viewed online pornography a few times at work. So he decided to tell his senior pastor about it. As a result, the pastor had a website-reporting service installed on all church computers. Then the two of them shared my friend’s story with the church. He made a public confession and received forgiveness and restoration.

This extraordinary act birthed a ministry to other online-porn addicts. If my friend had tried to hide his problem, he might have been fired. Instead, God used an act of integrity to redeem a bad situation.

The Art of Marital Love

Marital Love
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How do you know when someone loves you? Marriage therapist, Dr. Sue Johnson, views love in intimate relationships through the lens of attachment.

When a relationship is securely attached, you experience the other as “a safe haven” and “a secure base.” These two concepts are traditionally applied to the parent/child relationship. However, Dr. Johnson states that marital love has the same attributes.

This includes pastors and their marriages. As a pastor, when you experience your spouse as a secure base and a safe haven, you can relax and share your innermost self with your spouse. Dr. Johnson states that loving human relationships are the central emotional relationships in most adult lives and the most compelling survival mechanism for men and women because secure love offers emotional protection from life’s ups and downs.

Dr. Johnson observes that adults have the capacity to develop effective dependency—that is the ability to turn to others for emotional support. I Corinthians 13 offers us actions and attitudes that can help us to cultivate secure love for our spouses so that we can mature in effective dependency within our marriages.

Here are five steps to lead us there:

  1. Read 1 Corinthians 13. I Corinthians 13 is a familiar passage to many of us. Identify the actions and attitudes from this passage that characterize the ways in which you feel safe and secure in your marriage. Ask yourself, how can I embody some aspect of 1 Corinthians 13 a little bit more in my marriage? 
  2. Recognize when you are disconnected. Dr. Johnson observes that many of our arguments with people that we love are actually protests over emotional disconnection. If you have the same argument with the one you love repeatedly, chances are that protests about emotional disconnection are at the heart of your fights. How and when can you reach out to the one you love to reconnect instead of pushing one another’s emotional buttons or pushing your spouse away?
  3. Realize that emotional vulnerability includes risk-taking. Rebuilding connection can and does happen, but it feels risky. Take advantage of small moments of intimacy. Name them together. We often hold back in our relationships because we are afraid of being hurt or rejected. What words of assurance and acceptance can you offer to the ones you love even in the midst of an argument?
  4. Reach out for help. Rebuilding and repairing relational disconnection is hard work— especially if you have been disconnected for some time. Many couples need a relationship coach or a marriage and family counselor to help them develop the skills that are needed to create emotional safety in order to build connection. Are you willing to seek the skills of a professional counselor or relationship coach to help you deepen your marital emotional connection?
  5. Repeat what works. When you begin to experience small steps of success in reconnection, explore and examine the factors that made the connection safe and secure again for both of you. If you are daring, you can also begin to list the factors that led up to disconnection. When can you and your spouse set aside time to take a fearless relationship connection inventory?

Civil Lawsuit Over Girl’s Death Names the Rock Church as a Defendant

Rock Church San Diego
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Almost one year after a former elder at Rock Church allegedly murdered her adopted daughter, the San Diego megachurch and one of its employees have been named as a defendant in a civil lawsuit. Other defendants include the San Diego police and fire departments, county Child Welfare Services, the preschool that the girl attended, various employees of those organizations, and numerous family members.

In August 2022, 11-year-old Arabella McCormack died from suspected malnourishment and abuse. Her adoptive mother, Leticia McCormack, and Leticia’s parents, Stanley and Adella Tom, were arrested three months later in connection with the death. Brian McCormack, Leticia’s husband and Arabella’s adoptive father, died by suicide in the presence of deputies during their investigation.

Lawsuit Alleges Church Neglected to Report Suspected Abuse

The suit, filed on behalf of Arabella’s two surviving minor sisters, alleges, among other things, that the various defendants were negligent and failed to perform “mandatory duties”—reporting suspected child neglect and abuse to authorities.

The Rock Church employee named in the civil lawsuit is Kevin Johnstone, who’s also a chaplain for the San Diego Fire Rescue Department. “At some point, the Rock Church Child Abuse Investigator and Safety Operations Manager Kevin Johnstone became involved and visited the McCormacks’ home and the girls on multiple occasions,” the lawsuit reads.

“In fact, Mr. Johnstone visited all three children just the week prior to Arabella’s death…[and] their neglect and abuse was apparent to him. All three girls were severely emaciated, underdeveloped, and the victims of prolonged starvation, isolation, lack of medical care, torture, and abuse.” As part of his duties as a church employee and agent, the lawsuit adds, Johnstone should have “communicated and/or reasonably should have communicated the neglect to the Rock Church leadership.”

According to the lawsuit, “Rock Church (through its volunteers and employees) became aware of issues of child neglect and/or abuse relating to Ms. McCormack,” a former church elder and volunteer. The suit mentions Janet Horvath, a church member who had told her prayer group about the girls’ “fragile,” underdeveloped appearance. To the prayer group, Horvath said, Leticia McCormack described “bad behaviors” by Arabella and “spiritual warfare” within the home.

“Rather than report these troubling observations about the girls and Ms. McCormack to the authorities,” states the lawsuit, “the prayer group kept it within the church and took no action to protect the children.”

‘Can You Believe It?’—Dallas Jenkins Celebrates as ‘The Chosen’ Graces the Cover of TV Guide

The Chosen
(L) Screengrab via Facebook @Dallas Jenkins (R) Photo credit: Jesse T. Jackson

Critically acclaimed Christian series “The Chosen” was featured on the cover of TV Guide‘s July 24-Aug. 13 triple issue edition.

The 70-year-old magazine is a biweekly publication that provides television program listing information and features television news, celebrity interviews, reviews, and crossword puzzles.

This past Sunday (July 16) was the broadcast premiere of season one of “The Chosen” on The CW, a television network that covers over 98% of homes in the United States and is available with free over-the-air capabilities.

RELATED: The Chosen’ Fans Celebrate As Series Granted Exemption From Actors Strike

“The Chosen,” which follows the life and ministry of Jesus, is currently filming its fourth season. The first three seasons of the show are scheduled to air on The CW every Sunday at 8/7c, with the last episode of season three to be shown on Christmas Eve.

“Did you ever imagine a Jesus show would be on the cover of TV Guide? This feels historic,” a post on the show’s official Twitter account read. “Get used to different, indeed. This points people to the airing of all three seasons on Sunday nights on The CW.”

“When I was growing up, I loved TV Guide,” Dallas Jenkins, the show’s creator and director, said in a Facebook post. “I loved reading the recaps, and because I wasn’t allowed to watch most of the shows listed, it was my primary connection to this world of entertainment I was intrigued by.”

“And I remember thinking even back then, ‘Wouldn’t it be cool if there was good stuff in here related to stories of faith?’ But it seemed impossible,” Jenkins added.

RELATED: ‘The Chosen’ Wins K-Love Fan Award; Dallas Jenkins Shares ‘Jesus Is the Only Answer’ in What Appears To Be a Hopeless World

“Now check this out…in the upcoming issue, our little show is on the cover. Can you believe it?” Jenkins continued. “We want this show out there. Everywhere, as easy to find as possible. Like the song says, ‘Hide it under a bushel? No! I’m going to let it shine.’”

‘He Saved My Life’—Boy Helps Pastor out of Car in Flooded Indianapolis Street

George Shepard
Screengrabs via WTHR

When a water main broke beneath a neighborhood on the northeast side of Indianapolis and flooded the entire area, 72-year-old pastor George Shepard suddenly found himself adrift on the street in his car. Thankfully, help was soon on the way.

Shepard told WTHR that he awoke early on Wednesday (July 19) for a doctor’s appointment and was driving through the neighborhood at around 7 a.m. When he turned one corner, he was shocked shocked to see not only that the street was flooded but also that he was floating toward the deepest part of the pond created by the water main break.

“The water just picked up my car and brought it down,” Shepard said. “I had no control over it. It took me right to the middle of the intersection, and it just floated.”

The water rose to Shepard’s car window, leaving him stranded. Thankfully, Aldo Ramirez Villa, a preteen boy who was in the area, noticed Shepard and went out to help the pastor wade his way to higher ground. 

RELATED: Church Group in Texas Barely Escapes Van Before It Goes Up in Flames

“I was terrified. Because when you don’t have control of a vehicle, it’s terrifying,” Shepard said. “But I was able to, with this young man—if it wasn’t for him, I don’t know what would have happened. I really don’t. But he saved my life.”

“He actually helped me out of the automobile,” Shepard said. “I slipped and fell and almost drowned in the water. But to his grace, he helped me out, and I appreciate that.”

Although Villa provided reporters with cell phone footage of the rescue, apparently taken by a family member, he did not remain on the scene to be interviewed and has not sought to take credit for his act of heroism. 

The flood took many in the community by surprise, especially since no rain preceded it. Many residents simply looked out the windows of their homes early on Wednesday morning shocked to see the neighborhood partially underwater. 

“It’s unbelievable,” Lee Driver, a resident of the area, told FOX 59. “I wasn’t expecting to wake up to a whole lake in the middle of my neighborhood, but can’t go to work right now so…[I’m] just trying to make the best of it the best I can.”

RELATED: Police Charge 23-Year-Old With Hate Crime at Historically Black Maryland Church

Driver said he woke up around 8:30 a.m. and saw the church next door underwater.

Christians in Pakistan Flee Homes After Blasphemy Accusation

Pakistan
Mosque announcements to protest alleged blasphemy created large crowds of Muslims in Sargodha, Pakistan, on July 16, 2023. (Sanawar Balam for Morning Star News)

LAHORE, Pakistan (Morning Star News) – A third accusation of blasphemy in less than a month compelled Christians fearful of Islamic retribution to flee their homes in an eastern city in Pakistan this week, sources said.

Muslim crowds including members of Islamic extremist groups blocked the main Sargodha-Faisalabad highway for hours on Sunday (July 16) after mosque announcements urged people in Sargodha to protest posters allegedly bearing derogatory caricatures and comments about Muhammad, the prophet of Islam, and his wife Aisha, that were pasted on mosque walls.

“The situation was already tense in Sargodha after two Christians were arrested and charged with blasphemy, but this incident has put the security of the entire community at risk,” former provincial lawmaker Tahir Naveed Chaudhry told Morning Star News.

RELATED: Christian in Pakistan Charged With Blasphemy for Bible Post

The Christian politician told Morning Star News that the 3,500 to 4,000 Christian families of Maryam Town, a suburb of Sargodha, panicked when they heard the announcements.

“The posters were pasted on a mosque’s wall in Green Town which is adjacent to the Christian settlement,” Chauddhry said. “As word of the alleged blasphemy spread, hundreds of angry Muslims started congregating on the highway raising fears of violence in Maryam Town. Thankfully, the police responded in time, and a large contingent was deployed on all entry and exit points of the colony.”

The handwritten posters also reportedly lauded the desecration of the Koran in Sweden last month and were critical of the Abrahamic tradition of animal sacrifice, he added.

“The mosque announcements accused Christians of being involved in the incident because the posters were purportedly written by ‘an unknown soldier of Maryam Town,’” Chaudhry said.

Hundreds of Muslims blocked traffic and burned tires on the Faisalabad road intersection near Maryam Town at about 10 a.m., threatening to take matters into their own hands if police failed to arrest the unknown offender within 48 hours, he said.

The mobs dispersed after police registered a case under Sections 295-A, 295-B, 295-C, and 298-A against an unknown offender and also formed a committee of religious leaders to investigate the incident in coordination with the administration, Chaudhry said.

Another source told Morning Star News that nearly half of the Christian population in the area fled their homes fearing attacks by Muslims.

“Christian settlements across Sargodha district were alarmed when they heard about the protests near Maryam Town,” said Sanawar Balam, a member of the district’s human rights committee. “Though police were deployed in Christian neighborhoods, many Christian families left their homes due to fears of retribution.”

RELATED: Christian Girl Kidnapped by 60-Year-Old Muslim in Pakistan

He said that at least 15 Christian men were taken into custody on Sunday based only on their identity cards stating Maryam Town as their address.

“Most of these men were picked up from the streets when they were shopping for groceries or going for some work,” Balam told Morning Star News. “They were released after interrogation but then more people were taken into custody on Monday and Tuesday. “I believe there are four or five men still in police custody.”

Both Chaudhry and Balam expressed suspicions of a conspiracy against Sargodha’s Christians.

“This third incident points to a deliberate attempt to spark religious unrest and target Christians,” Chaudhry said.

He added that Christians had not opposed arrests and interrogation of their members, “because we want the real culprit or culprits to be arrested.”

“We told police and Islamic leaders that Christians already live in fear due to the abuse of blasphemy accusations,” Chaudhry told Morning Star News. “It’s highly unlikely that anyone would commit such a heinous crime and put the entire community at risk, so we have no objection to a fair investigation.”

Chaudhry said he and others had urged police to consider all angles in the investigation.

“The first call for protests was made from a mosque in Chak 49 Shumaali village, which is about four kilometers away from Maryam Town and is the same from which mobs were summoned in the Haroon Shahzad case,” he said. “There are two other mosques near the mosque where the blasphemous posters were found, but they did not initiate the call for protests. The police must investigate this aspect.”

Blasphemy allegations have led to mob attacks on Christian settlements, especially in Punjab Province.

On July 8, police arrested Zaki Masih after a Sargodha area Muslim accused him of insulting Islam in a Facebook post. On June 30, tension gripped Chak 49 Shumaali village of Sargodha after a Biblical verse posted on Facebook by Haroon Shahzad was deemed to liken Muslims to pagans and disrespect animal sacrifice.

Church of Pakistan President Azad Marshall condemned the incident and called for protection of Christians living in Sargodha.

“No Christian can think of committing such an act,” Marshall told Morning Star News. “In fact, we have always condemned incidents of Koran desecration and supported efforts for religious harmony and mutual respect for each other’s faiths.”

He recalled previous death and destruction in mob attacks on Christian settlements of Shanti Nagar, Gojra, Koriyan, and Joseph Colony due to blasphemy allegations, saying the provincial government and security agencies must ensure the security of Christian lives and property.

The Lahore-based Center for Social Justice noted that 171 blasphemy cases were reported in 2022, 84 in 2021, 208 in 2020, 36 in 2019 and 61 in 2018. At least 2,120 people were accused of committing blasphemy between 1987 and 2022, and Punjab Province topped the list with more than 75 percent of the cases.

Pakistan ranked seventh on Open Doors’ 2023 World Watch List of the most difficult places to be a Christian, up from eighth the previous year.

If you would like to help persecuted Christians, visit https://morningstarnews.org/resources/aid-agencies/ for a list of organizations that can orient you on how to get involved.  

© 2023 Morning Star News. Articles/photos may be reprinted with credit to Morning Star News. https://morningstarnews.org 

White Texas Couple Leads ‘Let’s Talk Race’ Class To Educate Churchgoers

Let’s Talk Race’ class to educate churchgoers
Let’s Talk Race

(RNS) — For Shelley Park, it was the 2019 killing of Atatiana Jefferson by a Texas police officer that transformed her from a casual observer of U.S. racial history to teaching about it in hopes of fostering cross-racial understanding.

For David Park, it was the need to learn from Black friends how to have “the talk” with both of their children: their biological son, Samuel, and his younger adopted African American brother, Jeremiah, as they grew closer to the age when they could be subject to a traffic stop.

For four years, the white couple from the Dallas suburb of Carrollton has been leading free classes called “Let’s Talk Race: A Beginner’s Guide to Conversations About Race,” in which they aim to teach people — primarily white Christians — the biblical, historical and societal aspects of race in America.

“I had been following all these people of color on Instagram and really learning and reading books,” said Shelley, who grew up as a missionary kid in the Philippines, in an interview with Religion News Service. “Many of them said, ‘We’re just tired,’ and ‘White people, we need you to get your people.’ And it was like the Lord said very clearly, as I was processing Atatiana’s murder, that it was time to do something.”

RELATED: Four Times God Powerfully Subverted Racism in the Bible

The Parks, who are nondenominational Protestants, developed the course, adapting it from a presentation by her father, a retired minister, and continue to offer five weekly hour-and-a-half online classes. Last year they created LTR Ministries Inc., a not-for-profit with a multiracial governing board, to give white people and churches a starting point on racial reconciliation.

“We’re not really helping you across that bridge or down that journey,” said Shelley, during a recent podcast episode of Jemar Tisby’s “Fighting Racism” series done in partnership with RNS. “We’re saying: Hey, you need to go take that journey. You need to go cross that bridge and we’re going to give you some tools to help you do that and do it well.”

They recommend books, movies, videos, podcasts and people to follow on social media to “expand your echo chamber.” Though they note they do not agree with every word written or spoken in their lists of resources, they say “it is good for us to learn to listen to voices who look at and see the world differently than we do.”

Their curriculum has addressed the “Curse of Ham” — a story in the Book of Genesis that some have used to support the idea that some races are subordinate to others — and food deserts that have left communities without nearby grocery stores. They deal with both individual racism, urging their students to leave the course ready to “sit and listen and to believe” their friends of color, and systemic racism, such as redlining, a form of housing discrimination.

They kept the virtual classes small, with about 15-20 people from around the country who heard about them by word-of-mouth, said Shelley, 51, who studied the Civil Rights Movement as a college student.

In 2020, amid COVID-19 shutdowns and protests sparked by the killing of George Floyd by a Minneapolis police officer, they reached more than 300 people through the course, offering as many as four classes a week. As controversies around critical race theory mounted, interest waned but they say registrations have increased more recently and they have five classes set for this fall, to be led by several different facilitators.

David, 52, who recently left a 27-year corporate career to become a seminary student at nearby Abilene Christian University Graduate School of Theology, said most class participants have a positive “aha moment” but a few have gotten angry and given up on the class after a session or two.

The Parks hope people leave the class feeling a responsibility to take action individually and with their churches, and not leave the work up to others, including the Black churches whose leaders have often publicly called for addressing racism. The couple recommend participants move on to interracial groups where they can have discussions and take actions, such as Be the Bridge, a nonprofit that aims to create “anti-racist bridge-builders,” and Threaded, an organization that encourages collaborative community action by a diverse group of churches.

12 Reasons for Pastors To Have an Ongoing Counseling Relationship With a Competent Clinical Therapist

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Like anyone else, pastors can suffer from mental illness and mental health issues, and when they do, they should seek the professional help of a competent Christian clinical therapist. But is there any reason for a pastor to engage the professional services of a clinical therapist if they aren’t suffering from a mental illness or struggling with mental health issues?

Yes.

In fact, there are several positive reasons why pastors might consider having an ongoing relationship – with themselves as client – with a skilled, experienced Christian clinical therapist. The work ministers do deeply impacts the lives of the people they serve, so making sure pastors are mentally and emotionally healthy for their work can directly contribute to how some pastors minister to others. Having a clinical therapist as part of a pastor’s inner circle of personal and professional resources can be beneficial for several reasons, like these 12 …

A safe and helpful person to talk to. Pastors routinely talk about how lonely ministry is. Some churches actually believe a pastor should NOT have personal friends from among his congregants, and some pastors aren’t very good about making personal friendships from among people they serve. Other pastors are afraid to reveal themselves at a deep, personal level to elders, or other church leaders or members, for fear of negative reactions. Having a confidential client-counselor relationship with a professional, Christian clinical therapist provides pastors with a person who is “safe” to talk to about anything, and have professional skills they don’t that can be helpful to them.

An invaluable check on their thinking. Many (most?) people who engage the services of a clinical therapist don’t do so because of mental illness, but because of irrational thinking. So much of our thinking is done on a subconscious level, but we’re often not adequately aware of the overall content of our conscious thoughts or patterns of thinking. Because of that, so much of our thinking is irrational. It’s easy for our thoughts to lean toward the irrational, even to the point of becoming patterns of irrational thoughts, habitual cognitive distortions, irrational attitudes, and even irrational core beliefs, all of which can develop into a practice of “defective systems.” Such thinking negatively infects decision-making and how a pastor thinks about others and serves them. According to research by the top rated online therapy sites, a clinical therapist skilled in Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy can help a pastor identify any patterns or systems of irrational thinking and learn how to more consistently think rationally.

Enhance self-awareness and other-awareness. Most of us are sorely lacking in self-awareness, and we’re even more lacking in other-awareness. A skilled therapist can help a pastor learn how to be more self-aware and other-aware, both of which will benefit leaders in understanding themselves and others better, and how to more effectively minister.

Resolving wounds and deficits. All of us have been wounded by others and have experienced detrimental deficits in our lives. Left unhealed, these open wounds and unresolved deficits can negatively impact our lives and our capacity to minister to others. Seeking counseling idaho falls can help pastors work toward healing and resolving any remaining wounds and deficits in their lives.

Maintenance of personal relationships. A clinical therapist can provide pastors with counsel for their own marriages, families, and other relationships, and support their ongoing health.

A cathartic outlet. A life overflowing with busy and demanding ministry can be stressful and tempting to foster anxious thoughts and behaviors. Meeting with a Christian clinical therapist can provide a catharsis for dealing with the stresses and anxieties of ministry.

Improve communication skills. Some pastors are “master communicators” when it comes to speaking to large groups, but are far less effective at communicating one-on-one. A skilled therapist can help equip pastors with greater interpersonal communication skills.

Improve problem-solving skills. All of the above (making sure thinking is rational, improving self- and other- awareness, etc.) contribute to pastors improving their problem-solving skills, and many therapists can train pastors in assessing issues, resolving conflicts, and rationally resolving problems.

Equipping for their own counseling responsibilities. Wise pastors will take what they learn in counseling and put it to use in their own counseling they conduct with others.

A hedge against burnout. Fully dealing with life’s issues, including mentally and emotionally, helps to provide a hedge against burnout. An insightful counselor can warn pastors against patterns and behaviors that would lead them to experiencing burnout from how they are conducting their ministry.

Deeply personal accountability. Clients share their deepest secrets with therapists they trust, especially knowing their relationship is fully confidential. Experienced therapists know how to be a source of accountability as pastors work on their own personal issues.

An example to the congregation. If a congregation is aware that a pastor has regular visits with a clinical therapist as part of his personal and professional support, it helps to remove the stigma that is still strongly associated with “going to counseling” or getting help from a mental health professional.

I’m not saying in this post that all pastors “need to see” a counselor; I am saying an ongoing relationship with a skilled clinical therapist can be a great resource to have in navigating the challenges and stresses of ministry. Pastors are human beings, and the support a clinical counselor can provide to them can help them with their weaknesses and can support their strengths.

I’m also not saying pastors should see a clinical therapist every week on an ongoing basis. A beneficial, ongoing relationship with a Christian therapist starts with the usual assessment, intake, and initial addressing of anything identified during the assessment process. But then maintaining visits every few months — or whatever the minister and counselor together deem beneficial — can be a great outlet for ministers to foster and maintain robust mental and emotional health for their work, and receive support for peak leadership performance.

A final note for CHURCHES AND CHURCH LEADERS – It could be wise to consider including in your church budget providing for the support of a Christian clinical therapist for your pastoral staff.

This article originally appeared here.

Spiritual Warfare and Small Groups

communicating with the unchurched

Editor’s Note: Spiritual warfare and small groups can be deeply connected because of the close connections leaders have with members of their small groups. This, however, is not a reason to fear—but it is a wake-up call to remember the significance of the role small group leaders play in the spiritual life and well-being of their members. 

The struggle is real.

Spiritual Warfare and Small Groups

When you drop the phrase spiritual warfare into a casual conversations, you often get mixed reactions.

On the one hand, a lot of people are skeptics when it comes to anything invisible or supernatural. In fact, many people will believe in heaven and angels but choose not to believe in hell or demons.

On the other hand, a lot of people can get downright superstitious about the subject. Everything bad that happens is perceived as a demonic attack.

In the middle are most of the pastors I know, who believe rather strongly in the existence and power of heavenly beings—both angels and demons—that exist all around us in a heavenly, spiritual realm hidden to our eyes and human senses.

And this spiritual realm is not, right now, at peace. It’s a war zone.

Don’t misunderstand. It isn’t a battle of God versus Satan or good versus evil. All power and authority, in heaven and in earth, belongs to God alone and has been granted to his kingly Son who rose victoriously from the dead, defeating once and for all the power of sin and death.

But for a season, allowed by the permissive will of God for his own purposes, “The devil…prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour” (1 Peter 5:8 NLT).

Life Formula Is Not the Answer, So Use Wisdom and Discernment

communicating with the unchurched

A life formula doesn’t work in the real world. Why? Consider this: If you’re baking a cake, you can use a formula. If you’re mixing chemicals, I’d recommend a formula. If you want to know how big to make the beams on your floor so the second story won’t collapse, by all means, use a formula.

But once you start planning for college, thinking about marriage, finding a job, or anything involving the variables called “real people and real life,” then dump your life formula. It simply won’t work. You just entered the world of probabilities, and formulas are now all qualified with words like “usually,” “often,” and “most.”

Why a Life Formula Doesn’t Add Up

When we assume we can use a life formula to sculpt the future, we end up with a bucket full of regret. Or we might feel betrayed by the system. I wish I could list the number of formulas I thought would work that did not.

I was all but promised certain things would happen when I blogged consistently, did xyz as a dad or husband, wrote a book, got a bachelors degree, got my M.Div. … and a whole lot more. You name it, each had promises of what it would lead to. But they rarely, and sometimes never, did.

But this truth doesn’t seem to stop people from trying to sell me on their life formula. The other day, someone did it with the “key” to writing. Another guy told me the “key” to getting volunteers.

The Bible Isn’t a Formula Either

Often people try to turn the Bible into a formula too. They see it as an “If you do this, then this will happen…either for good or bad” kind of resource. While Scripture certainly contains some “if/then” truths, it’s also equally true that the Bible isn’t a book of formulas. The most famous of these is the entire book of Proverbs. It’s filled with “if/then” statements that are “wisdom” for living, not formulas you can plug and chug through.

The one that bugs me the most is Proverbs 22:6ish. “Train a child up by [insert your own list of good behaviors and a litany of Christian ideas here] and when they grow old, they will not depart from it.” Right. So you can trace back every kid who goes astray to a failed ingredient in the life formula. Mom didn’t read enough Scripture to them. Dad didn’t come home from work early enough. Their church wasn’t ______ enough … and on and on.

But if you’ve taken a seminary class on Proverbs, then you know that “proverbs are not promises.” They are “wisdom literature filled with probabilities.” Yes, if you hang out with people who do “x,” you’re more likely than not to do “y” with them. Maybe a lot more likely. But we all can cite exceptions because, for better or worse, people are always screwing up a life formula.

In-N-Out Bans Masks for Employees, Notes the ‘Importance of Customer Service’

in-n-out
Raymond Shobe from Hesperia, CA, CC BY-SA 2.0, via Wikimedia Commons

The California-based hamburger chain In-N-Out is known for its “animal style” burger, Double-Double meal, insanely long lines, and its faith-based leadership. The restaurant giant also continues to hit the news for its approach to policies surrounding masks and other COVID-19 pandemic protocols.

A recent employee memo detailed a new policy banning masks for employees. In-N-Out said, “Our goal is to continue to provide save and customer-centric Store and Support environments that balance two things that In-N-Out is known for—exceptional customer service and unmatched standards for health, safety, and quality.”

In-N-Out Burgers Bans Masks for Employees (Unless Medical Note Is Provided)

A recent memo to employees in Arizona, Colorado, Nevada, Texas, and Utah explained a new mask policy, which is effective Aug. 14. The policy does not apply to employees in California and Oregon.

“No masks shall be worn in the Store or Support facility unless an Associate has a valid medical note exempting him or her from this requirement,” the guidelines stated.

The memo began by addressing the company’s pride in customer service. “We are introducing new mask guidelines that emphasize the importance of customer service and the ability to show our Associates’ smiles and other facial features while considering the health and well-being of all individuals.” Details about the guidelines include helping “to promote clear and effective communication” between customers and staff.

Employees who are required to wear job-specific masks—such as in the “patty room” or laboratories—are exempt from this new policy.

All other exemptions, however, will require a “valid medical note.” The company provided further details, stating, “Without disclosing the medical diagnosis or confidential medical information, the medical note should clearly state the reason for the exemption and include the estimated duration, if applicable.”

If an employee of In-N-Out does not follow these new guidelines and wears a mask in the Store or Support environment, he or she can receive disciplinary action, potentially including termination of employment.

While In-N-Out stated that the new policy “will be reviewed periodically” and is “subject to local health authority guidelines,” the public has mixed opinions on the restaurant’s guidelines.

There continues to be a wide range of responses to the pandemic, protocols, and how individuals approach recommendations. Some feel that they’re “the only ones wearing masks” while others are calling for stricter public protocols.

Dr. Lucky Tran, the one who leaked the In-N-Out memo, called for followers to “Please remember to call In-N-Out and tell them that their ban on wearing masks is harmful.” Tran continued, “They are taking calls and sending feedback to management.”

‘It Will Be the Biggest Film in History’—Jim Caviezel Says ‘The Passion of the Christ’ Sequel Could Be 2 Movies

Jim Caviezel
Screengrab via YouTube @Shawn Ryan Show

Actor Jim Caviezel provided an update on the highly anticipated sequel to Mel Gibson’s 2004 film “The Passion of the Christ” during an interview with former Navy SEAL Shawn Ryan earlier this month. Caviezel portrayed Jesus in the film and said he would reprise the role for the sequel.

Discussing how his faith has affected his Hollywood career, Caviezel said, “I’m always a better actor with God.” Caviezel recounted telling fellow actor Sean Penn as much while filming “The Thin Red Line” in 1988, calling it a gift to be able to lead people to Jesus.

Promoting his new film, “Sound of Freedom,” which is based on the true story of United States federal agent Tim Ballard’s fight against human trafficking, Caviezel was asked if he plans on continuing the fight against the human trafficking industry.

“I’ll never stop,” Caviezel replied without hesitation.

RELATED: Jim Caviezel’s ‘Sound of Freedom’ Crushes ‘Indiana Jones’ at the July 4th Box Office

Ryan then asked the actor to share what movie he would be shooting next. Caviezel said it would be “The Passion of the Christ: Resurrection” or “Sound of Freedom 2.”

Ryan asked if production for “Resurrection” was already underway.

“The writing? Yes,” Caviezel said, adding, “I asked [Gibson] if he would be ready to go in January.” Caviezel said that Gibson replied, “Yeah, maybe.”

“How about the end of the fall,” Caviezel recounted asking. “Yeah, maybe,” Gibson replied. “September?” Caviezel asked again, and Gibson gave the same reply: “Yeah, maybe.”

Caviezel said that this is how it was when they were planning to film “The Passion of the Christ.” That is, until Gibson suddenly called up Caviezel and asked him if he was ready to start filming.

RELATED: Rumors ‘The Passion of the Christ’ Sequel Is Shooting in Spring Confirmed To Be False

Gibson is currently working on a movie with Mark Wahlberg, but Caviezel believes Gibson will focus on “The Passion of the Christ: Resurrection” as his next film after that.

Evidence of the Resurrection Is ‘Fascinating,’ Says Baltimore Ravens Coach John Harbaugh

John Harbaugh
Baltimore Raven's head coach, John Harbaugh, takes a photo with a fan during practice at Under Armour Performance Center on Aug. 1, 2022. Maryland GovPics, CC BY 2.0, via Wikimedia Commons

Longtime NFL head coach John Harbaugh is an outspoken Christian, as well as a history buff. On a recent episode of the “Sports Spectrum” podcast, the Baltimore Ravens coach said he’s intrigued by historical proof of Jesus’ resurrection from the dead.

Harbaugh told Jason Romano he’s been listening to an Alistair Begg sermon about the topic, which he finds “just fascinating.” The entire basis of Christianity “basically comes down to the resurrection,” said Harbaugh. “If the resurrection didn’t take place, then Christianity—there’s no point to it.”

Coach John Harbaugh: God Is at Work

Harbaugh pointed to apostles and martyrs in the early Christian church who were eyewitnesses to the resurrection and “held firm” to their belief that Jesus was crucified and then rose again. “Nobody at any point in time recanted,” he added, even when they faced “being executed in the most gruesome ways.” To Harbaugh, the “strong evidence” and “consistency of the accounts” are factors that “I don’t think you can ignore.”

Harbaugh, who said he spends about 30 minutes daily on Scripture reading, devotions, and prayer, urged Christians to study Scripture as well as history. The coach said he has read through the entire Bible “numerous times,” which has helped build his trust in God and in God’s will.

At age 60, Harbaugh said it’s easier now to look back and “see where [God] has brought you.” Looking ahead can be tricky, but “when you look back, there’s a certainty in the road that you’ve traveled,” he said. “And as I get older now, I can really see that more clearly.” The coach added that he strives to put his life into God’s hand and to trust God’s plan.

Ravens Coach Finds Success in Pursuing God’s Purpose

As John Harbaugh prepares to enter his 16th year with the Ravens, the 2019 NFL Coach of the Year emphasized that success comes from pursuing God’s purpose. The “ultimate success” comes not from winning championships and trophies, he said, but from seeking “connection with God.”

God’s knowledge of our true desires is “why he pursues us vigorously,” Harbaugh added. “Before the beginning of time, [God] had a plan for us, and he created us in a way [that] he knows us intimately,” said Harbaugh. “[God] knows what our true desires are, what our purpose is. So trying to find that purpose or connection with God and being connected and filled with the Spirit of God, the Holy Spirit—that is success. That is the ultimate success.”

Virginia Teen Killed, 3 Others Injured in Fiery Car Crash While Returning From Church

Virginia crash
Screengrab via NBC Washington

A teenage girl died and three other teens were seriously injured in a fiery two-car collision in Burke, Virginia, on Tuesday (July 18), according to Fairfax County police.

A family member of the girl told FOX5 that the group of four, which included the deceased’s younger brother, had just left an evening prayer service at church and was planning on going somewhere to eat. 

Bystanders attempted to pull the teenagers from the burning car before firefighters arrived. The teenage girl, who was driving the car, was declared dead at the scene. 

The three other teens involved remain in the hospital. While their condition is unknown, Henry Zarco, uncle to the deceased and her brother, said that his nephew is “fighting for his life.”

“Prayers out to my other nephew, her brother,” Zarco said. “We’d appreciate that very much.” 

RELATED: Pastor Who Survived Plane Crash Speaks Publicly for First Time Since Accident That Claimed 4 Lives

The adult driver in the other vehicle was also injured. Police believe the adult’s vehicle “slammed” head-on into the car carrying the four teens, causing it to catch fire. The driver’s current condition is unknown. There were no other passengers. 

Zarco described his niece as a young girl of faith who had just graduated from high school and was enrolled at George Mason University in Fairfax for this upcoming fall.

Placing a stuffed bear, flowers, and a balloon near the scene of the crash, Zarco told NBC Washington, “She always liked stuffed animals. Thought I would bring her one.”

RELATED: 5 Young People Killed in Crash While Returning From Bible College Visit

“I mean, she always had a smile on her face, and that’s the image that I have in my head,” Zarco said. “She gave her all. She gave her life to God and served. And it’s just the hardest thing ever, you know. I just don’t understand why.”

Chris Sonksen: How To Protect Your Ministry Teams From Being Torn Apart

Chris Sonksen
Photo courtesy of Chris Sonksen

Chris Sonksen and his wife, Laura, are the founding pastors of South Hills Church, a multi-state, multi-campus church based in Southern California. Chris is the founder of Church BOOM, an organization that has provided personal coaching to hundreds of churches, and he is the author of several books. His latest is, “Saving Your Church from Itself: Six Subtle Behaviors That Tear Teams Apart and How to Stop Them.”

Other Ways To Listen to This Podcast With Chris Sonksen

► Listen on Amazon
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► Listen on Spotify
► Listen on YouTube

Key Questions for Chris Sonksen

-What is “leaderdrift” and why do you think it is so common?

-What are some examples of leaderdrift and how should leaders address it?

-What are some consequences of misalignment?

-How do leaders balance welcoming diversity with seeking team alignment?

Key Quotes From Chris Sonksen

“It’s those subtle driftings that tear teams apart. I always say that when the enemy takes a run at your church, he doesn’t do it through those who attend it. He’ll do it through those who lead it.”

“Is there a shifting in the conversations that happen in staff meetings? Is the person starting to come up with a little bit more judgment than they do solutions? Is there a difference in who they’re connecting with? Are they starting to pull away a little bit? Are they starting to become a little bit more critical than they used to be?”

“You have to notice when something is shifting in the relationship between you and the team member.”

“Alignment won’t guarantee success, but misalignment will guarantee failure.”

“Misalignment creates so much damage…And when you look throughout Scripture, it happens to almost everybody.”

“I don’t think there’s any problem disagreeing with someone. I don’t think there’s any problem having a different opinion…What it comes down to is, what do you do with it?”

RELATED: Justin and Lindsey Holcomb: How Pastors Can Stay in Their Lanes While Helping Survivors of Abuse

77 Faith Groups Get Total of $92 Million for Innovative Faith Programs for Children

Children
Photo credit: Ben White/Unsplash

(RNS) — Dozens of Christian groups seeking to instill faith in the nation’s children have been given grants of as much as $1.25 million to help them meet their mission.

Lilly Endowment, through its Christian Parenting and Caregiving Initiative, recently approved a total of $92 million for 77 organizations — including denominations, local congregations and regional districts of national church groups — as they seek to create or expand home-based programs and parent networks that will nurture the spiritual growth of young people.

“We’ve heard from many parents who are seeking to nurture the spiritual lives of their children, especially in their daily activities, and looking to churches and other faith-based organizations for support,” said Christopher L. Coble, Lilly Endowment’s vice president for religion, in a July 5 statement announcing the grants. “These thoughtful, creative and collaborative organizations embrace the important role that families have in shaping the religious development of children and are launching programs to assist parents and caregivers with this task.”

The grant recipients include a range of faith groups that represent people of different branches of Christianity, including from a diversity of racial and ethnic groups, as well as educational institutions. Most of the programs will start later this year, with funding intended to support the first five years of their work.

People participate in an Esperanza seminar. Photo courtesy Rubén Ortiz

People participate in an Esperanza seminar. Photo courtesy of Rubén Ortiz

The initiative seeks innovative ways to engage children in lives of faith, inside and outside of church buildings. During the height of COVID-19, many of the traditional methods of children’s ministry — Sunday school, vacation Bible school, confirmation classes, baptisms — disappeared or were adapted. In the aftermath, parents and church leaders continue to grapple with the best ways forward for spiritually educating children in their homes and congregations.

RELATED: Catechism Use Can Help Parents Develop Their Children’s Faith

In its request for proposals, Lilly Endowment noted the finding of the National Study of Youth and Religion about the outsized role parents have on influencing the religious practices, beliefs and values of their children. The finding “underscores the importance for churches and other Christian organizations to provide support and guidance to interested parents as they navigate the challenges of raising children today,” according to Lilly.

The Rev. Rubén Ortiz, director of national programs for Esperanza, said his Philadelphia-based organization, which seeks to strengthen Hispanic faith-based organizations, will use its $1.25 million grant to expand services to help families and caregivers share their values and faith with their children. It plans to focus on equipping parents by holding “train-the-trainer” events for at least 200 congregational leaders at predominantly Hispanic churches in its region.

“Whether it’s fragmentation, technological advances or spirituality, we need to refresh the traditional approaches to our faith,” Ortiz told Religion News Service. “We spent several months learning more deeply about child and adolescent development, parenting styles, attachment theory, family systems and so on, with an emphasis on faith development.”

Middle Collegiate Church, a New York congregation that received a $1.25 million grant, intends to use books, mealtime “conversation cards” and parental guides to offer biblical and action-oriented stories to engage children and families.

Pioneering Christian Broadcaster Stuart Epperson Dies

Stuart Epperson
Stuart Epperson Sr. co-founded Salem Media. Photo courtesy of Business Wire

(RNS) — Stuart Epperson Sr., who co-founded one of the largest conservative religious radio broadcast outlets, died Monday (July 17) at the age of 86.

His death was announced by Salem Media, which Epperson co-founded in 1986 with his brother-in-law, Edward Atsinger. The two built Salem into a radio powerhouse that became a key communication channel for the religious right and a mainstay of the Republican Party. It helped congeal America’s religious communities into a potent political force.

By 2018, the company was so involved in Republican politics it was pressuring its radio hosts to support then-President Donald Trump.

Epperson was a member and onetime president of the conservative Council for National Policy, an influential group whose members include leaders of anti-abortion organizations, think tanks, CEOs, wealthy donors, pastors, leaders of conservative universities and right-wing pundits.

He twice ran for Congress in the mid-1980s to represent the 5th Congressional District of North Carolina. (He lost to 10-term Democratic Congressman Stephen L. Neal.)

But the for-profit Christian radio empire Epperson built with the aim of offering an alternative to the secularism that he and Atsinger saw as part of America’s moral decay was his singular accomplishment.

Salem owns 101 stations in New York City, San Francisco, Chicago, Dallas and Atlanta. Its eight daily show hosts are name brands in the religious and political right. They include Hugh Hewitt, Mike Gallagher, Dennis Prager, Charlie Kirk, Sebastian Gorka and Eric Metaxas.

The company is also an outlet for Christian rock, through its Salem Music Network, which offers three 24-hour Christian music formats. Salem also owns Townhall, a conservative media site, and Regnery Publishing.

“He was a true believer, who felt he had a mission — to provide an alternative to what he called ‘creeping secular humanism,’” said Adam Piore, an independent journalist who interviewed Epperson. “Whether you agreed with him or not, he helped change Christian radio, and in the end did as much as anyone to build a parallel universe of talk radio geared towards people who didn’t feel like the mainstream media was speaking for them. He was a key player in the religious right, willing to go into big cities and use stations to proselytize.”

Epperson was born to a family of tobacco farmers in the Southern Virginia town called Ararat, named after the final destination of Noah’s Ark.

His older brother Ralph had fallen in love with radio and convinced his parents to get a mail-order Montgomery Ward radio set. Ralph eventually built a radio station on the second floor of their farmhouse that broadcast out into the community.

Stuart’s first radio role may have been to read the 23rd Psalm over the radio when he was 10 years old.

He went on to study broadcasting at Bob Jones University in South Carolina, where he married classmate Nancy Atsinger. Together with Nancy’s brother, Edward, also a Bob Jones alum, the two started a radio business.

They first acquired a radio station in Bakersfield, California, and later KKLA in the greater Los Angeles area. In a handful of years, Salem more than doubled the number of stations it owned.

Critics: Stay Away or Draw Close to Them?

communicating with the unchurched

Criticism hurts, especially the non-constructive kind. We tend to stay away from such critics. But is that the wisest choice? Should we draw close to them instead of pulling away from them? In this post I explore the idea of not shunning your critics.

Murray Bowen, the father of family systems, coined the phrase “non-anxious presence.” He used this term to describe a personal quality that when a leader exhibits it, can keep a family or a group’s overall emotional reactivity and anxiety down. He and others suggest that leaders should not cut off their critics, but should actually stay connected to them in a calm way.

What does a non-anxious leader look like?

  • can truly listen to another, even if he or she is bearing bad news or criticism
  • can hold his emotions in check when in the hot seat
  • seldom gets defensive
  • can acknowledge the emotions of his critic
  • will calmly and courageously respond instead of reacting

Ernest Shackleton, one of the greatest explorers ever, modeled this non-anxious presence with his Antarctica expedition crew as they were marooned for over a year in 1915-1916 after their ship was crushed by the ice. His calm presence and his drawing to difficult crew members allowed him to lead them all to safety. Not one man perished. Here’s what he did.

  • His photographer, Frank Hurley would feel slighted if the crew didn’t pay attention to him and would become difficult to work with. Instead of isolating him, Shackleton gave him a place in his tent and often conferred with him.
  • His physicist, Reginald Jamer, was an introverted academic. Shackleton feared that his personality might invite ridicule that in turn could escalate into a serious issue. He made him a bunkmate as well.
  • When Shackleton selected a crew to take a lifeboat to sail from Elephant Island to South Georgia Island to assemble a rescue party for the entire crew, he selected the carpenter, McNeish. He chose him not only for his skills but also because he was concerned that McNeish could create discontentment with the men who were left.
  • Finally, Shackleton specifically picked two other crewmen because he felt they might cause trouble in his absence. In total, more than half of the group he chose were potential troublemakers.

So, how can we present a non-anxious presence to those who are our critics or to those with whom our personalities rub? I suggest these five ideas.

  1. When criticized, truly try to understand the critic’s perspective. Ask questions. Really listen.
  2. When someone criticizes, thank them for sharing it.
  3. Keep a good sense of humor. Don’t allow the criticism to suck the life from you.
  4. Spend some social time with the critic so he can get to know you. Share some of your personal life story.
  5. Do something thoughtful for your critic, something that he or she would not expect from you.

As counter-intuitive as this may seen, staying calmly connected to your critics can actually help you grow as a leader and move your church or organization forward.

At what point do you believe you should you draw the line with criticism? That is, when should you cut if off before it truly damages you?

This article originally appeared here.

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