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Ebola Deja Vu in Africa

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The Democratic Republic of the Congo is experiencing an Ebola epidemic. My family lived in Zimbabwe in the 1980s when the world was first becoming aware of AIDS. Many Zimbabweans didn’t believe the disease was real. They thought AIDS was an invention of either a government that wanted to control their lives or of Western countries that wanted to control their sexual activity and reduce the birth rate. Only after thousands of deaths did people accept the reality of the disease. By then AIDS was out of control.

Fast forward to the Democratic Republic of the Congo in 2019. The second worst Ebola epidemic in history is taking place in the eastern part of the country. Recently, my husband led an orality and Bible storying seminar for Christian leaders just south of the worst-hit areas. He asked one of the men about Ebola, and the response was that it isn’t a real disease. Sadly, this response reflects the belief of 25 percent of the people in the parts of the DRC most affected by the disease. As was the case in Zimbabwe, this church leader believes the disease has been manufactured by political factions to reduce the population, which would then allow them to exploit the country’s vast mineral wealth.

Despite the efforts of faith leaders to convince their communities that Ebola is real and that there are ways to prevent its spread, the disease has claimed over 1,900 lives in the year since the current outbreak was declared on August 1, 2018. The World Health Organization (WHO) is reporting approximately twelve new cases of Ebola each day in the DRC. The Congolese government says only 50 percent of Ebola cases are being identified.

Download the Ebola fact sheet produced by the Baptist Mission of Uganda.

In mid-July, the Congolese city of Goma reported its first case of Ebola. Goma, with a population of two million, is situated near the borders of Rwanda and Uganda. Because the city is a major transportation hub in the area, there are very real concerns Ebola may become an international problem. Health-care workers in all three countries are being trained extensively, and their governments are cooperating effectively in efforts to contain the disease, but it is a serious and complicated issue, especially in the eastern DRC. In mid-August, cases were reported in a third province in the region.

Decades of political instability, mistrust of government, and preference of traditional remedies over what is offered at medical clinics have caused many people in the affected areas to refuse to seek treatment. Because so many people wait until they are extremely ill to go to a treatment center, and therefore they are likely to die there, the centers have become unfairly thought of as places of death instead of places of recovery. Many who accept the reality of Ebola haven’t had access to medical care because regional conflict and mistrust of health-care workers has led to numerous casualties and the destruction of treatment facilities. The BBC reports there have been over 198 attacks against Ebola treatment facilities and health-care workers this year.

Shortly after the death of the man who had Ebola in Goma, the WHO declared the situation a public health emergency of global concern. This is only the fifth time WHO has taken this action regarding any global health situation. It should help increase the amount of aid being directed to the Ebola epidemic. Already, stepped up production of a very effective vaccine is underway and the production of a second vaccine is in discussion. And in recent days, two drugs have been found to raise the survival rate to 90 percent in patients who receive the drugs when they still have low levels of the virus in their blood.

Fervent Prayer Needed Now During Ebola Outbreak

Dr. Larry Pepper, an IMB medical doctor in neighboring Tanzania who ministered during an Ebola outbreak in Uganda several years ago, suggests some ways we can pray for those in areas affected by Ebola:

  • Pray for the safety and courage of health-care workers.
  • Pray for the sick to heal.
  • Pray for peace among the families who suffer from the stigma of being touched by Ebola in some way.
  • Pray against the lies and schemes of Satan regarding Ebola.
  • Pray for local churches to show Christ’s mercy in their communities through services like food distribution, material aid, and praying with and for health-care workers.

Local churches can also help families by caring for orphans and vulnerable children who are often stigmatized because of the effects of Ebola on their families. Churches can positively impact their communities by spreading truths about Ebola and demonstrating good relations with treatment centers. Two weeks ago Protestant churches in Goma provided hand washing stations at their facilities to promote a preventative measure as simple as this method of good hygiene.

Support Baptists in their Ebola prevention, education, and orphan care efforts.

Now a second man has died of Ebola in Goma, and his wife and one of his ten children have confirmed cases. Many of our friends and ministry partners pass through Goma on their way to other cities. A pastor friend who is there now says the people are afraid. Perhaps their fear signals they accept the reality of Ebola and will take precautions. Pray they do so before it is too late.

This article originally appeared here.

Read about Kent Brantly returning to Africa with the Ebola outbreak happening.

23 1/2 Themes for a Great Theme Night

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You’ve done backwards theme night, crazy hat night, silly sock night and double point night  for your kidmin… now what?

Here are 23 and a half themes for theme night to get those creative brain cells going.

1. Glowstick Theme Night – Play games with glow sticks (in the dark, of course, though do have some light for safety.) Kids stand on a predetermined line and toss their glow sticks into a bucket (line the top with glow sticks).  Or, you could play glow-stick “pick-up-sticks” or glow stick ring toss.  Large Group lesson could be on letting your light shine for Christ. Matthew 5:16

2. Riddles and Giggles Night – Everyone brings a joke to share. Large Group Lesson – a merry heart does us good. Proverbs 17:22

3. Pirate Theme Night – Kids dress as pirates. Play games with gold-covered chocolate coins or have a scavenger hunt. Large Group Lesson – The Bible doesn’t talk about pirates, but we do have an account of Paul’s shipwreck. We also have other verses that talk about treasure. Acts 27/28 or Proverbs 2:3-5

4. Dots and Stripes Night – Kids dress in polka dots or stripes. For every section said, kids get to “dot” their leader with a dot sticker. Large Group Lesson – Joseph and his coat of many colors. Explain that the big deal about the coat was it’s embroidery and the fact that it was longer—not short such as a shepherd’s coat. These were the types of coats given to privileged people who didn’t have to work. (Shorter shepherd’s coats allowed the shepherd to quickly climb over rocks and jump over streams.)  No wonder Joseph’s brothers were jealous. Genesis 37

5. Goofy Glasses Night – Kids wear goofy glasses. Give prizes for the goofiest. Large Group Lesson – Hebrews 12:2  Here we’re told to look to Jesus.

6. Dress Like Your Dad or Mom Night – Kids dress like a parent. Large Group Lesson – Ephesians 6:2 (To help kids get ideas, suggest they model a uniform if their parents wears a uniform to work, or if their parent is an Awana leader. Or they could carry a “tool” of their parents employment: a book if she’s a teacher, a stethoscope if she’s a doctor, etc.)

7. Nickel and Dime Night – Kids bring nickels and dimes for your local Awana missionary or another missionary your church supports. (Let leaders and kids know about this night several weeks beforehand so they can begin saving.)  Play games with the coins: tossing them into a bucket; seeing how many a kid can balance on the end of a spoon etc. Large Group Lesson could be about missions or you could ask your Awana misstionary to speak.

8. Mr. (or Mrs.) Potato Head Night – Children dress as potatoes. Provide material scraps, sequins, etc. and then give them categories. Dress your potato as: an Awana leader, a well-known person, a dog, etc. Give prizes for the most creative. Large Group Lesson – no, there are no potatoes in the Bible, however, you could talk about the variety of food God provides for us and talk about thankfulness for all the good things we have to eat.

9. Town Night – What’s happening in your town right now? Are you having a pumpkin festival, a winter festival, a cheese festival? Is the new mall opening? Is the high school basketball team heading for the state championship? Think of ways you can incorporate that into theme nights. Perhaps you could collect food for a community food bank as part of the theme.

10. Pastor Appreciation Night – Ask the children to write a note of appreciation to the pastor, collect them and give them to your pastor during Pastor Appreciation Week. If your kids don’t know your pastor (or even if they do), invite him to speak that night.

11. Ruler Theme Night – All clubbers bring a ruler. You could start the night to see which team has the longest amount of inches (represented by their rulers). This would be especially fun if some brought yardsticks or tape measures. Give a point for each inch represented. You could have competitions where the result needs to be measured such as throwing a ball or frisbee (or if inside, a cotton ball). Large Group Lesson could be about a ruler such as Solomon or David.  Or it could be about Colossians 3:15 on allowing the peace of God to rule in your heart.

12. Duct Tape Night – Children come with duct tape on their clothes (such as making a hat or bracelet from tape), or have duct tape available in various colors and design and allow the kids to be creative. Large Group Lesson – Proverbs 18:24: A true friend “sticks” closer than a brother.

13.  Time Capsule Theme Night – The first night of club gather together items for a time capsule. If you plan to open the capsule at the end of the year, you could have the children write down two or three goals and simply put those in the capsule. You could also have the kids guess the results of upcoming happenings of the year: How many nights will Awana be called because of snow? How will the local sports team do in the final rankings? Will Leader Katie have a boy or a girl? How many total verses will be said during the year? (Of course, then you do need to keep track.)

Or, you could do a longer capsule, one to be opened when most of the kids are graduating from high school. Include a current event update, goals the kids have, goals you have for your children’s ministry and anything else you would like to put in the capsule.

Large Group Lesson could be about redeeming the time. Ephesians 5:16

14. Souper Bowl Night – Bring soup for a soup kitchen or food pantry. Large Group Lesson on service (many verses you can choose from).

15. Campfire Night – If you’re located in an appropriate climate and have the ability to actually have a campfire, that’s great. Otherwise make one from logs, orange, brown, red crepe/tissue paper and a couple flashlights. Sing campfire choruses. Again, if you can, have s’mores. Large Group Lesson – John 21:9  Talk about the need to follow Christ.

16. King and Queen Night – Children can dress as kings or queens. (Younger girls will especially like this.) Large Group Lesson – Esther or any other Bible event that involves kings and queens.

17. Fashion Disaster Night (good for girls)  Children come dressed as mismatched as they can. Large Group Lesson – 1 Samuel 16:7

18. Cookie Night – Bake a giant cookie (or four giant cookies – one for each team). Count how many chocolate chips you put into the cookie. Each child gets one guess as to how many chips are in the cookie. The one who comes closest gets to take the cookie home (wrapped in plastic wrap) or he/she might choose to break it into pieces and share it with his/her team. Large Group Lesson could be on sharing.

19. Any Country Night – Choose a country to celebrate. This could be one where your church has missionaries or a home country of one of your leaders. Play games from that country, fix food from that country, talk about the culture and the land. Large Group Lesson – a missionary story about that country.

20. Messy Night – Kids wear dirty clothes. This is not only fun, but gives the game director the freedom to play messy games. Large Group Lesson could either be about Jeremiah 17:9 (the deceitful heart) or Isaiah 64:6 (our righteousnessnes are as filthy rags).

21. Obedience Night – Invite a Christian dog trainer to come to club and talk about training dogs. You could play games such as Simon Says. Large Group Lesson – on the importance of obeying God or obeying parents (Ephesians 6:1)

22. Cow Theme Night – Children dress in black and white. Play “Dead cow, sick cow” during Game Time. (A quick web search will provide the rules.) Large Group Lesson – Psalm 50:10 – He owns the cattle on a thousand hills.

23. Ant Night – Invite someone to talk to the group who knows about ants (perhaps they have an ant farm). Have ants on a log for a snack (peanut butter and raisins on celery). Large Group Lesson could be Proverbs 6:6; Proverbs 30:24

And now for the half …

24. Half Night – Halfway through the year have Half Night. Award small prizes to kids who memorize Scripture verses. During game time, kids run halfway around the circle. Have snack time where each clubber receives half a cookie. Large Group Lesson – You could do this one right after King and Queen Night and once again talk about Esther and how the king offered her anything up to half his kingdom.

For more great ideas for your children’s ministry, check out all our articles here. 

The Real Cultural Core Issue: Disconnection

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This post about disconnection was originally posted to my Facebook profile the day after the deadly mass shootings in El Paso, Texas and Dayton, Ohio…

Two mass shootings in twenty four hours. We’re severely broken.

This morning, I’m starting a sermon series about the topic of parenting, family, and influencing the next generation.

In the next week, all kinds of opinions will be shared from both left and right about what legislation should or shouldn’t be passed.

But there’s a core issue…disconnection.

We’re disconnected. We’re divided.

There’s a coldness and a darkness, and on days like today, we feel its presence more because the darkness dominates the news cycle. But it’s there on the days between the acts of violence, festering and brewing.

In a world where God would have us cultivate deeper connections with him, with each other, with people of all ethnicities and backgrounds, we keep isolating, separating, and choosing fear and hate instead of love and compassion.

White supremacy and its sickening ideologies thrive in a culture of fear and anger. People are dying because they’re brown-skinned, or they’re of another religion, or they’re from a different country.

The world around us needs love and light. Withdrawal and isolation isn’t an option. Neither is a spirit of vengeance.

I believe that the church gets to address the core issue of relational connection and the redemption offered by Jesus, who came to rescue a very sin-sick world. You and I get to have a voice that fights against the darkness.

Our hearts break. We pray for the families and communities surrounding the victims. And we also get to share the great hope we have, both now and for eternity, in the redemptive, saving work of King Jesus.

And whether you follow Jesus or not, it’s impossible to ignore the fact that there’s a severe shortage of love, truth, grace, and righteousness around us.

Where do love, connection, truth, grace, and righteousness get cultivated? It starts in homes. In marriages. In families. It filters out to churches, schools, neighborhoods, and hopefully the halls of government, too.

We have to feel the hurt and pain. We have to see the darkness for what it is. And we have to answer it with love and light like never before!

This article about disconnection originally appeared here.

Two Years After Church Massacre, Pastor Runs for Office

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Saying he wants to restore “civility and godliness” to Texas and stop its downward moral spiral, Pastor Frank Pomeroy announced on Sunday that he’s running for state senate. Pomeroy’s church, First Baptist Church Sutherland Springs, was the site of the November 2017 Texas church shooting that claimed 26 lives—including that of Pomeroy’s 14-year-old daughter, Annabelle.

Pomeroy, 53, has no political experience and hasn’t been vocal about politics, but he says the massacre at his church two years ago and in El Paso earlier this month put him on a “trajectory” to seek public office. “This is totally out of my wheelhouse,” he admits, “but I’m totally trusting the Lord to show me how to do the things I need to do.”

‘If Texas falls, the country falls’

Pomeroy filed paperwork for a senate run last week and formally announced his Republican candidacy for District 21 after worship yesterday. “If I can bring civility and godliness and help stymie the downward spiraling of the great state of Texas,” he says, “that’s what I’m choosing to try to do.” The pastor adds that “morality and integrity” are “disappearing rapidly”—especially within the Democratic Party—and that “if Texas falls, the country falls.”

After the massacre at his church, Pomeroy says, he began having more conversations about tough issues such as guns. And after the El Paso shooting, he was upset when some people politicized the tragedy. “There was so much salt poured into that wound, and the wound was tragic enough,” he says. “I feel like something needed to be brought to the conversation, like civility and real intelligent discourse.”

District 21, which extends hundreds of miles from Austin to the U.S.-Mexico border, is solidly Democratic. Pomeroy faces incumbent Democrat Judith Zaffirini, who’s been in office since 1987. After the pastor spoke Sunday about declining morals, Zaffirini said she was “very surprised to hear such a harsh comment coming from a pastor.” She knows Pomeroy as “a man of integrity,” she adds, and plans to engage with him “respectfully,” as she would with any challenger.

‘Faith sustained us,’ After Texas Church Shooting, says Pomeroy 

On Saturday, Pomeroy participated in a panel at a mental health conference in San Antonio, sharing how his congregation survived and thrived after the shooting. “The church was the center of the community in many ways,” he said. “And because of that, the entire community put faith beyond themselves. In the midst of that tragedy, that faith sustained us, and…that faith [is] helping us to grow.” Earlier this year, First Baptist dedicated a new building, declaring that “evil did not win.”

People who are hurting should hope in God, not in others, Pomeroy told conference attendees. “Without hope, there is no life.” The pastor requested continued prayers for all shooting survivors so they know they’re not alone.

His congregation’s goal, Pomeroy says, is to be there for other people. Victim advocate Katy Quinney, a responder in Sutherland Springs, says they’re succeeding. “They are the most faithful people I’ve ever met in my life,” she said Saturday. “That resonates from the inside of that church out into the entire community.”

Bethel Church on Homosexuality: Jesus Showed Us How to Disagree But Love

Changed
Screengrab Facebook @BethelChurch, Redding

Bethel Church in Redding, California is drawing criticism for a series of posts on social media highlighting a new ministry called the Changed Movement. The ministry is geared toward “Christians who are unfulfilled in identifying as LGBTQ+.” Some critics feel the church isn’t taking a clear enough stance on homosexuality while others fear they are edging toward conversion therapy territory.

“We believe God is on a mission to make Himself known. And He is using the most controversial, unlikely and provocative topics—homosexuality and gender identity—to do it,” Changed’s website reads. 

For the past few weeks, Bethel has been posting short testimonies of people who once identified as LGBTQ+ but have since left that lifestyle behind. One such testimony is from Daniel Delgado, who writes:

On a Sunday night in December, when I was 20 years old, I met Jesus in a very experiential way. I surrendered my life to him. I then began to attend a program that ministers to those with gender confusion. So many painful issues in my life were addressed there. Over time, I began to accept myself and be at home in my own skin, as a man. Seeing and knowing other men as human beings instead of sexualizing them has been a life-changing transformation. I am so thankful for the new life God has given me. Today, I enjoy life and get to point others to the hope I have found.

While that particular post drew some critical comments from people concerned that Bethel was giving a testimony about conversion therapy (which has been the topic of several legislative debates in California in particular as well as the broader country), the following post drew even more criticism for the church’s alleged ambiguous stance toward homosexuality. Some in the evangelical church argue one cannot fully know Christ while clinging to a homosexual lifestyle and that to tell someone anything other than this would be leading them astray. 

The slew of comments garnered by this post seem to encapsulate how the broader church in America is grappling with how to address homosexuality in the church. On a scale from affirming to rejecting, churches across the country are having to decide where they fall on the scale and how they will communicate this to their communities. Several denominations have experienced schism over this very topic. 

Responding to a comment on this post, Bethel Church said: “We believe you can love people and disagree with them simultaneously, and that Jesus modeled this for us well.” 

Bethel Attempts to Clarify

Ken Williams and Elizabeth Woning co-founded the Changed Movement. In a video posted to Facebook, Williams explains both he and Woning experienced suicidal feelings when they were living LGBTQ lifestyles. “I stopped having suicidal feelings after I found help and hope through church and through a counselor.” Williams says being accepted into a “safe space” in church happened for him in the late 1980s, but that now, in today’s culture, “it’s much easier now to find a safe space to go into LGBTQ than it is to leave there.” 

Woning says they are trying to create a safe space at Bethel to show people that “Jesus has hope for you.” The group shares testimonies, Woning explains, not to convince people they need to change, but to show that “when you experience the love of Jesus, there’s dramatic impact.” 

Sharing part of his own experience in counseling, Williams explains he experienced God’s “unjudgmental love” that embraces a person with grace before that person takes steps to change his or her lifestyle. Williams says Changed doesn’t use the approach of telling someone what to do, rather they want people to “encounter the same loving Jesus that we did.” 

Woning says the change in her lifestyle was the “serendipitous outcome” of asking Jesus for wholeness and freedom. It wasn’t, she insists, “because I disciplined myself into a certain feeling or a certain belief.” 

Williams and Woning say they “know hundreds” of people who have left an LGBTQ lifestyle behind. They also know “a lot” of people who have not left the lifestyle behind—even people who have come to Bethel for help. Woning says she knows people who have engaged in Bethel’s Sozo ministry, which is an intercessory prayer style developed by the church. They’ve also “soaked” in worship for 72-hours straight and not gotten any help. As a result, these people feel “absolutely rejected by God, absolutely hopeless.” These are the people Williams and Woning say they are trying to help through the Changed community. 

“You’ll never know unconditional love unless you share your condition,” Williams says as he advocates for a “safe space” where people are free to admit they struggle with same-sex attraction. “We come alongside [people who are same-sex attracted] relationally instead of with our directives.” 

‘I Saw a Refugee Crisis’–What Iranian Christians Are Facing Once They Leave

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Editor’s note: This article contains a graphic image of a man who was beaten. We feel it is worth including in order to illustrate Christian persecution in Iran and the European refugee crisis. 


“I saw a refugee crisis going on in the world, and I couldn’t not go.”

 A little over a year ago, Eric Demeter was working in business when he realized God was calling him back to ministry. While he at first pursued that calling by working for a corporate ministry, he realized something was missing. “I knew my heart and my passion was working with people. Put me with the people, put me with the needy…boots on the ground, that’s Eric,” he said in an interview with ChurchLeaders. 

European Refugee Crisis: Working with Iranian Refugees in Greece

Eric already had quite a bit of experience leading missions teams around the world and had been through Athens a couple of times on short-term trips. He knew there were many people who were not Christians in the area: “I saw tens of thousands of people going through Athens, which is a hub, and I wanted to share about Jesus, so what better place to go?” Throughout the past year, he has been working with Iranian refugees in Greece, sharing the gospel, teaching English and Bible classes, and simply living life with people. 

Because of his work, Eric has had an up-close look at the persecution Christians are facing both in Iran and in Greece, and he wants to get the word out to the church about what our Iranian brothers and sisters are going through. “Part of my job is just sharing their stories,” he says, “that we have brothers and sisters in need around the world who need our support, need our help, need our prayers. And the persecution doesn’t stop once they come to Greece. You would think that once they come to Greece everything is fine, but it’s actually not.” 

What Christians Are Facing in Iran 

Iran, which is ruled by Islamic law, was listed ninth in Open Doors’ World Watch List 2019, which ranks the top 50 countries in the world where Christians face the worst persecution. “Christians in Iran are not allowed to share their faith,” says Eric. They are not allowed to gather publicly or to baptize other Iranians. If they do, he says, “They can get threatened, they can get interrogated, they can get put in prison and they can be tortured.” 

He has heard a lot of stories about Iranians running for their lives. Some of the people he has met in Greece left Iran, not because they had been persecuted, but because they didn’t want to live under the oppression of the regime. “Many of them have become Christians after coming to Greece,” he says. 

One of Eric’s friends, whom we’ll call Izad, was imprisoned twice for sharing his faith. While in prison, he shared a 12-square-foot cell with 14 people. Every day, the only food he received was one piece of bread and one potato, which he had to share with three other people. He lost over 100 pounds in less than 90 days. 

Izad was also hung from the ceiling and beaten. His sister-in-law took the picture below right after he was released the second time.  

european refugee crisis

The Iranian government told him if they caught him sharing his faith again, he would die. 

Eric says he asked him, “Was Jesus worth it?” 

“Yes,” Izad responded. “I will experience trouble again for Jesus.” 

More Trouble in Greece

You might think that once Christians escape from Iran, they are free from being persecuted for their faith. This, however, is not the case. Eric says that when Iranian refugees come to Greece, they end up in refugee camps, where the culture is the same as the one they just left: It is majority Muslim and Christians are still persecuted. 

6 Things the Church Should Learn From Chick-Fil-A

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Upon graduating college, Chick-fil-A was not the place I envisioned myself landing. Endless amounts of chicken and the growing infatuation for chicken (plus two pickles) sandwiches seemed less than the bright future anticipated. Thankfully, it was the exact job God planted me in to grow my love for people, not poultry. And there are a few lessons the church should and could learn from Chick-fil-A.

While my time with CFA recently ended, what I gained from the company never will. Forgetting the times I spilt three gallons of sweet tea on the floor and had to remake 150 homemade biscuits…

I’ll pass along the valuable lessons during the past 13 months that we can learn from Chick-fil-A.

1. Learn from Chick-fil-A: It’s my pleasure! Or is it?

Chick-fil-A is known for having the most caring team members around, workers who take pride and pleasure in what they do. While working at my most recent restaurant, many guests posed the question, “Why is everyone here so nice?!”

Here’s the secret: The hiring process for Chick-fil-A is brutal and hard to get through. Operators only hire the cream of the crop in group interviews and stacks of applications. If it’s not going to be their pleasure serving others, then Chick-fil-A is not the company for them. In the words of a former operator, “the paycheck is not the reason they should be applying at this company.”

When considering if a ministry/church volunteer position is for you or someone else, take a close look at the reason why. If serving others isn’t the top reason, it’s not a good fit for the church.

2. Learn from Chick-fil-A: Stop stocking Polynesian.

The first faces of a Chick-fil-A restaurant are the front counter crew. If someone on the frontline isn’t taking an order, their first trained reaction is to clean and their second is to stock.

Know what America’s favorite dipping sauce is? Most guess Chick-fil-A sauce, but it’s surprisingly Polynesian sauce. With a high demand for the beloved, tangy sweet-and-sour sauce, many on the frontline find themselves keeping occupied and being on task by stocking Polynesian when the lines get low.

Unfortunately, if all eyes stay too long on the task, the guests are ignored.

Where are our eyes in the presence of guests? Is it on the church budget, the worship team set up, the attendance … or on the needs of those we have a moment with? There’s a difference in completing a task and actually doing our job.

3. Learn from Chick-fil-A: Treat potential leaders like icebergs.

Ten months into my Chick-fil-A venture, I was transferred from a marketing director to a manager. Initially, I fought the change; while being a leader comes natural for me, running a restaurant does not.

Thankfully, my operator and Chick-fil-A as a whole view leaders as icebergs.

The part of an iceberg above the surface makes up only a rough 10 percent of the icy mass. Ninety percent cannot be seen, for the majority of an iceberg is below the water. If people are like icebergs, the 10 percent most look at represents skills and learned habits—like putting together an ice cream machine and counting registers. Those things can be learned! The larger 90 percent represents the conditions of the heart—humility, character, honesty, integrity, etc.

In the church, how often do we base people’s stature and positions on learned skills, aka the 10 percent? Character and persistence will be what takes a vision farther after volunteers burn out on their own competence and craft.

15 Prayers for Kids in School

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You guys, it’s August 1 and school is literally around the corner. For some of you it’s starting momentarily. And we need prayers for kids in school especially now. I always have mixed feelings about seeing kids go back to school. My hope is they go back to school after a summer of diving deep into Jesus. As someone who spends her summers helping kids encounter and experience God in a way that changes them forever I so badly want them to stick with Jesus all year long. I spend a lot of time praying for these little ones. I know that school can be very tough emotionally and spiritually for so many kids (hence my mixed emotions).

Here are some specific prayers for kids in school from Scripture that I pray for kids throughout the year but especially as they go back to school.

“Jesus, may their roots go down deep into the soil of your marvelous love and please give them the power to understand how long, how wide, how deep, and how high your love for them truly is.” (Ephesians 3:17-18)

“God, help them to remember and really grasp that they are fearfully and wonderfully made, with no mistakes!” (Psalm 139:14)

“Holy Spirit, empower them to see and add value to those who are lonely, left behind, bullied, or forgotten. May they show love to everyone they encounter.” (John 13:34

“God, help them to have be strong and courageous, especially when it’s extra hard.” Joshua 1:9

“Jesus, protect their eyes from things they don’t need to see, their ears from harmful messages, and their hearts from lies that may seek to take root. Help them to dwell only on what is from you.” Philippians 4:8

“God, remind them that you always hear them and are always with them” Psalm 18:6

“Father, when they feel lonely or confused remind them that you are writing their story and you know them by name.” Isaiah 43:1

And here are some prayers for kids in school I pray that are just “Miss Mel” specific.

“Jesus, encourage their heart today. Remind them that weird isn’t bad, it’s unique and you delight in unique.”

“God, may they know deep in their heart that they are worthwhile because they are created in your image.”

“Father, remind them that they have the power to choose their words and their actions.”

“God, may kindness and compassion ooze out of them.”

“Jesus, help them to remember that even though they may not always feel you, you are always with them and you never forget them.”

“God, remind them that even though they won’t always make the right choices you will never stop loving them.”

“Holy Spirit, remind them that with your help they can do hard things and love hard people.”

“God, help them to laugh today. Bring them bits and pieces of joy throughout their day that remind them they are loved by you.”

However you word them, your prayers matter. Before the age of 12 kids are deciding what they believe. They’re hearing, seeing, and doing things that will ultimately shape who they become. When we pray for them we get to be on the frontlines on the battlefield with them. Don’t become weary in your fervent prayers, they matter! Let’s commit to intentionally praying for our littles this school year.

This article about prayers for kids in school originally appeared here.

God Isn’t Trying To Make You Behave Better

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One of the notions a lot of us hold somewhat unconsciously is that God’s commands are mainly about getting us to behave better. We think God has set up some rules and he’ll reward us if we follow them.

I run into this all the time in the training and coaching we do at Gravity Leadership, and in discipling leaders locally through the church plant I co-pastor:

  • “I should know better…”
  • “I know God wants me to be better at this…”
  • “I’m trying hard to do what God wants…”

We imagine God’s commands are an expression of his desire to control us. Some arbitrary rules God has set up for his own mysterious benefit.

Arbitrary rules or best practices?

But what if God’s commands aren’t about getting you to behave better? What if God isn’t trying to control us at all?

What if God’s commands are actually given to us for our flourishing? What if they’re not arbitrary rules but more like “best practices” for being human? What if he’s actually trying to help us become truly human?

This thought is captured well by St. Theophan the Recluse, an Orthodox monk who wrote a series of letters to a woman coming to faith in 19th century Russia:

I think many people do not live as they should, because they think that rules about the worthwhile life are outwardly imposed, and not springing from man’s very nature, and therefore not needed.

Moral performance or mutual participation?

So, for example, I noticed awhile back that every time I read the word “righteousness” in the Bible, that I assumed it basically meant “doing a good job at following God’s arbitrary rules.” I assumed living a righteous life in God’s kingdom was mainly about about moral performance, measuring up, getting it right, behaving better.

But I’m learning that righteousness is less about moral performance for God and more about mutual participation with God.

Here’s what I mean. Take Psalm 15, for example. The Psalmist begins,

Lord, who may dwell in your sacred tent?
Who may live on your holy mountain?

Then we hear the answer:

The one whose walk is blameless,
who does what is righteous,
who speaks the truth from their heart…

Righteousness as moral performance

One way to interpret this passage is to assume that righteousness is about moral performance. It sounds like this:

The righteous person performed in an exemplary way, and his reward is that he gets to dwell in the Lord’s sacred tent, on the holy mountain. God noted his moral performance and said, “Great job! As a reward, you can hang out in here with me!”

Righteousness as mutual participation

But there’s another way to interpret why the righteous person is hanging out in God’s sacred tent. This is the mutual participation interpretation:

The righteous person trusted that God’s way was good, and so she began living into it (speaking the truth, etc). She found as she did so that God was there with her, empowering her to continue to live abundantly.

The more she practiced this new way of life, the more her life could be characterized as a with-God life. The natural result was a life on God’s holy mountain, hanging out in the Lord’s sacred tent.

Dwelling in God’s sacred tent isn’t a reward for good behavior, it’s just the natural result of choosing to flow with grace in God’s kingdom. It’s just what happens when you “practice righteousness.” It’s a natural result, not a reward.

In fact, that’s why God urges us to practice righteousness! Not because he is capricious and controlling, but because he knows that our life will flourish with him and others when we live in this way.

Righteousness is good, but not because God arbitrarily decided it was, or because God finds pleasure in controlling people, but because it’s the best way to bring human flourishing to ourselves and others!

In other words, God isn’t trying to get us to behave better, he’s proclaiming the good news of what we were truly made for, and inviting us to live into it! Speaking the truth, walking in the light, living righteously with our neighbors, etc, are all just best practices for being human.

Training in righteousness

It’s like physical training. If I want to get in shape or lose weight, I engage in practices that will help me advance toward this goal: I go to the gym regularly, I get plenty of sleep, I eat healthy, nutritious food. But why? Do I think the gym gods will reward my performance with a more in-shape body? Of course not.

Losing weight and feeling better aren’t a reward for my good performance, it’s just my body’s natural response to my new practice. It’s a natural result of a certain kind of life, not a “reward.” It’s just what happens.

This is the dynamic in 2 Peter 1:3-11. God’s power gives us everything we need for a godly life, so he urges us to make every effort to add to our faith: goodness, knowledge, self-control, etc. And why?

For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ… if you do these things, you will never stumble, and you will receive a rich welcome into the eternal kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

Being effective and productive, never stumbling, receiving a rich welcome in the kingdom… all natural results of the kind of life that “adds to your faith,” not rewards for good behavior.

In other words, the “righteousness” we are called to practice in this passage is a way for us to mutually participate with God in his kingdom, not a moral performance we complete apart from God and hope he’s pleased.

People who join with God and live the life he shares with us get certain “results” as simple byproducts of living a certain kind of life, because how can we not? We’re sharing in the very life of God!

We’ll never die, because God won’t die. We’ll never stumble, because God is sure-footed. We’ll never be shaken, because God is never shaken. We lack nothing, because God lacks nothing. And we are drawing our very life from our communion with him.

Our flourishing is always a byproduct of our mutual participation, never a reward for our moral performance.

Repentance is just stepping back into the flow

The good news, then, is that God isn’t trying to get you to behave better. At least not for the reasons you might think. He’s simply inviting you to experience life with him in his kingdom, where you’ll never be shaken, never stumble, where you’ll receive a rich welcome.

And any time we notice we’re not experiencing those things, all it means is that we’ve momentarily stepped outside the flow of the kingdom. All we need to do is simply step back in. That’s repentance, just stepping back in to life in the kingdom.

There is no reconnection fee. No lengthy explanation needed. No penance required. God is not frustrated or flustered by it in the least. He is simply there in his sacred tent, waiting for us to step back into the abundant life he offers, warmly welcoming us when we do so.

This article about God isn’t trying to get you to behave better originally appeared here.

How Tim Tebow Stewards His Time

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Time.

Compared to the riches of the world like fancy cars, enormous mansions and gadgets that will do practically anything desired with a few spoken words, time is the most precious, and wasted, of all commodities.

You cannot replace it like a new sofa or a computer. Once the moment has passed, it’s gone and is irreversible.

Time is relentless and is an indefinite progression of existence and events.

It’s valuable. Priceless. We need to make the best of it.

We spend it without thinking and truly knowing the worth of each tick tock on the clock. It’s wasted in front of the television, and on smartphones and social media.

When you donate this personal treasure to a worthy cause, what do you get in return?

My wife and I volunteered at The Night to Shine sponsored by the Tim Tebow Foundation a few months ago. We didn’t anticipate the wonderful emotional and spiritual return on our investment, but we are richer now.

I pulled my tuxedo out of the closet, and my wife donned a beautiful black dress so we could shine shoes for two hours of time to make the attendees look perfect for the special-needs prom in Huntington, West Virginia.

When the night ended, our cups were full, and our hearts shone brighter than the shoes we labored over.

“It’s going to affect you just as much as you are going to affect them,” Tim Tebow recently told me in Columbus, Ohio, before the Syracuse Mets took on the Columbus Clippers. “It’s amazing in God’s economy when we go and serve and give our time, that we are more fulfilled than we would be by doing anything else.”

People in the Huntington community rallied around this event, and hundreds of special guests were treated to a magical night where they walked the red carpet and were made to feel like they were Number One for a few hours.

“It doesn’t always make sense trying to be able to give to and love people that a lot of the world hasn’t loved,” Tim said. “But it does something to us, and that’s why it’s my favorite night of the year, because it’s hundreds of thousands of people coming together to celebrate God’s love for humanity.”

On February 8, 2018, across the nation, 200,000 volunteers made sure that more than 100,000 guests were treated like kings and queens for at least one night.

The goal of Night to Shine is to bring faith, hope and love to brighten the day for these individuals.

Tim has an unusual platform and takes advantage of his celebrity status to help make this program such a success.

“I try not to let it get in the way, because I play hard and compete and work on my craft,” he said. “There are pros and cons that come with it, and I learned that a long time ago.

“I have to answer more questions from the media, and I have demands on my time, and that’s okay because I also get to see kids in hospitals who want to meet me. That is awesome, and it’s something that I would not have without this platform.

“I am grateful that I have a chance to make someone feel special.”

Time.

Tim makes sure his is well spent on playing baseball and making others happy.

“We all have an identity that God gave us, and we are all unique,” he said. “I love seeing the kids smile, and I’m grateful that they want to meet me. They are just as important in God’s eyes as I am to them.”

Consider putting the phone away or thinking twice about watching a movie for the eighth time, and instead, volunteer to help a worthy cause, or visit someone in need. Give your time.

It will be an investment well spent, and you will be more impacted emotionally and spiritually than you ever have been before.

And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: for charity shall cover the multitude of sins (1 Peter 4:8 KJV).

For more information on the Tim Tebow Foundation, visit the website https://www.timtebowfoundation.org/.

This article originally appeared here at Athletes in Action.

Church Communications Isn’t Sexy, But It’s Crucial!

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When I first started dabbling in church communications I developed this dream—a persona of what a full-time gig in communications would look like. The picture I had in my head made it a dreamy hunk of a job.

Wearing hipster sweaters and glasses. Drinking fancy coffees. Fine-tuning sermon series designs so they’re just perfect. Delivering awe as I walked people through our new website design I’d carefully crafted over the span of six months. Accolades from other millennials as I killed the paper bulletin in favor of a dedicated bulletin website. The church communications role of my dreams was sexy.

Communications is now my (almost) full-time job. It is not sexy.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my job, as I’m sure you love yours. But church communications is not sexy. The reality is that there are a lot of things about doing the work of communications in a church that are at best tedious, at worst soul-sucking and frustrating.

Like folding and stuffing all six bajillion bulletins every week because you just can’t kill that sucker. Or not having enough content for your weekly email, much less daily social posts. Like being frustrated that your website still looks like it was built in 1999 but you don’t have time to overhaul it. Or killing yourself and working 70 hours in a week to crunch out the website by the hard deadline you’ve been given. Or explaining to Carol why she can’t announce her sister’s cousin’s second bridal shower from the stage… again.

Church communications is not sexy. Far from it.

But the truth is that the unsexy parts of the job are some of the most important.

It’s the unsexy parts of the job that will help your church share Jesus with your community. It’s your servanthood that will support the work of the ministry that ultimately brings about the Kingdom.

Some of those unsexy parts of your job are the tried and true tools of the trade that will get the message of your church out effectively, and point people to Jesus.

Like that bulletin you loathe. The information in it is critical for someone who is new to your church, and it serves as an object for them to hold onto, making them feel more comfortable as they wait awkwardly for the service to start.

Or like killing yourself to get that beautiful new website up and running. Your website is your first impression. So sacrificing some time, energy, and sanity to get it up to par will have a direct result in how many people walk through your church doors for the first time on a Sunday.

Sometimes that devotional you slapped together for the email at 4:30pm on Friday deeply impacts someone, and they take a step closer to Jesus as a result. Or that mediocre graphic you made in Publisher encourages one of your elderly church members who hasn’t been able to connect on Sunday morning for a while.

Whatever the thorn in your side may be right now in your role, the unsexy part of your job can have an impact if you leverage it for the kingdom. But you have to be willing to see it for what it is, and stick with it despite the way it may grate your skin.

So let go of the picture you have in your mind of what church communications looks like, and figure out how to leverage some of those tried and true methods of communication. Because being an effective communicator isn’t sexy. But being an effective communicator does bring people to Jesus—and that’s totally worth it.

 

This article originally appeared here, and is used by permission.

9 Ways Great Leaders Communicate

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Great leaders are great communicators. Communication certainly includes making a great speech, or for pastors, delivering a compelling sermon. That kind of communication is important, but it’s less so than communicating well one-on-one. I recently finished reading neuroscientist Andrew Newberg’s book, Words Can Change your Brain. His book suggests 12 key neuroscience based communication practices. I’ve included how great leaders communicate in 9 ways.

Nine ways great leaders communicate:

1. Great leaders communicate with a relaxed demeanor.

They’re not tense or frazzled. People pick up on our emotional tone, whether it’s good or bad. It’s called emotional contagion. So when we’re relaxed, it encourages the other person to relax as well.

2. Great leaders communicate by staying fully present for the person they’re talking to.

They’re not in a rush to move on to something or someone else. They don’t look over the other person’s shoulder. Rather, they make genuine eye contact. Eye contact stimulates the social networks of our brains, decreases the stress hormone cortisol, and increases the neurotransmitter oxytocin which has been called the trust chemical, all of which enhance communication.

3. Great leaders communicate by practicing inner stillness and quietness.

This reflects the Psalmists words in Psalm 46.10Be still and know that I am God.

4. Great leaders communicate by paying attention to non-verbal cues in the face and body of the person with whom they’re talking.

Our words seldom fully convey what we really think and feel. However, our eyes, face, and tone communicate much of what we do think and feel. If we don’t pay attention to the non-verbal, communication will suffer.

5. Great leaders communicate by expressing appreciation and gratitude.

People yearn to hear encouragement from their leaders. Authentic praise for a job well done makes huge deposits in the souls of those around us. And, when we give a compliment at the end of a conversation, it’s actually received better than one given at the beginning of a conversation.

6. Great leaders communicate by speaking with a warm tone.

A warm tone can set the stage for effective communication whereas a harsh or negative tone can set up resistance in the other person.

7. Great leaders communicate by speaking slowly.

When we speak slowly, those listening can comprehend us better and it can help calm an anxious person.

8. Great leaders communicate by speaking briefly.

They don’t hog the conversation with their words. Since our brain can only hold so much information at once in our working memory, speaking for shorter lengths of time improves communication by helping the listener retain more of what we say.

9. Great leaders communicate by listening deeply.

To listen deeply means that we don’t let our minds wander but that we give our full attention to the other person speaking.

Try some of these practices the next time you talk to someone and see what difference it can make.

What would you add to this list?

Teaching Your Kids the #1 Thing God Expects of Them

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As a parent, your top priority is teaching your kids the one thing God expects of them. There are many characteristics that I would like to be used to describe my children – responsible, kind, generous, forgiving, etc. However, according to Scripture, there is surprisingly only one characteristic that God prioritizes as a requirement for children –obedient.

While there are many specific things that God has to say to His followers in His Word, there are very few times that God specifically addresses children by name.

But when He does, He makes it very clear what He expects of them, and it always has something to do with their relationship with (guess who?)… their parents.

Ephesians 6:1-2 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right… Honor thy father and mother.

Colossians 3:20  Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well-pleasing unto the Lord.

Did you know that the ONLY THINGS God ever commands children to do in all of the Bible are these two things – Obey & Honor, which is obedience in two forms – outward obedience through actions and inward obedience and respect from the heart.

If the ONE THING in all of the Bible that God commands from children is simple OBEDIENCE, shouldn’t that be a driving force of what parents should be teaching your kids?

Yet in our society today, obedience among children is not on the rise. Sadly, we’re raising a generation of parents who obey their children more than the other way around. (The Bible tells us that disobedience among children will increase as we approach the last days… 2 Tim. 3:1-2.)

So why should parents prioritize teaching your kids to obey? Very simply:

  • Because your child’s obedience to you is a reflection of their obedience to God. Children are commanded to obey their parents “in the Lord.” (Eph. 6:1)
  • Because it will prepare your child for a fruitful and successful life. The Bible promises that “it will be well” with them, and they will enjoy a longer life. (Eph. 6:2-3)
  • Because learning to obey is a part of God’s ultimate plan to save your child’s soul. Learning obedience is a part of “delivering their soul from hell.” (Prov. 23:14)

Many parents will give reminders, or rebukes, or even rewards in hopes that their children will obey, but they will not actually make their children obey. This is a very disturbing trend. Parents should not be afraid to require obedience of their children.

Not only do parents have the right from God to tell their children what to do; they also have the right from God to make them do it.

So why aren’t more parents enforcing the biblical expectation of obedience upon their children? Why aren’t parents requiring obedience of their kids, rather than giving them options to choose from? And how do parents expect their children to one day obey God as adults if they don’t first learn to obey them as children?

Parents, we have been given by God the authority to make our children obey. And we don’t have to be mean, or abusive, or harsh about it. Nor do we have to apologize for it. Don’t hand over your God-given authority due to misbehaving kids, or social pressure, or fear of man. You, as the parent, have been put in charge in your home, so don’t forfeit that. Remember that obedient children are raised by obedient parents.

Telling your children what you expect of them, and then consistently enforcing those expectations does not make you the bad guy, it simply means you’re guilty of good parenting.

It’s time for parents to get back to the basics of simply teaching your kids to obey.

Prov. 23:13  Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die. (Certainly not a politically correct verse, but biblically correct. Children need clear direction and consistent, loving discipline from their parents.)

Notice throughout the book of Proverbs how often Solomon taught obedience to his children. He started the first 5 chapters with this theme of obedience (Proverbs 1:8, 2:1, 3:1, 4:1, 5:1)

As parents, we must teach our children the #1 Thing that God expects of them – Obedience. (Or as we used to sing it as a child: O-B-E-D-I-E-N-C-E).

  • Teach them to obey immediately. Children are to learn to obey what they are told when they are told.
  • Teach them to obey respectfully.  Never allow your children to say no or talk back to you.
  • Teach them to obey spiritually. Remind your children that their obedience to you is a direct reflection of their obedience to God.

I love how simply Ken Blount put it when he said, “There is only one command a child has, obey. Many people struggle in life because they don’t. Teach your kids, in love, to be obedient.”

It’s time we start prioritizing what God has clearly prioritized for our children. Maybe it’s time we sat down with our kids and reminded them of the #1 thing God expects of them. Our homes and their futures depend on it.

This article about teaching your kids originally appeared here.

Introverted Pastor, This Might Hurt—But You Need to Hear It

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I have a strong word of encouragement to the introverted pastor.

Be extroverted on Sunday.

You can do it.

Every time I post about introversion, I hear from pastors and church members who talk about how introversion negatively impacts the ministry of the church.

I get it. I really do. In fact, I am it. On a scale of 1 to 10 of introversion—if there were such a scale—I’m probably a 7 or 8. And, I can be a 9 some days. So, I understand.

But, the interaction we have with people is a key role we play in growing and leading the church. I’ve written in numerous posts that just because I’m introverted doesn’t mean I don’t love people. There may be some pastors who don’t really love people—and I personally don’t see how they can be very successful if that’s the case—but introversion is a personality trait. It’s not an indicator of how deeply a person loves people.

I love people. Really. Especially people who are excited about what God is doing in their life. That motivates me. My introversion, however, if I’m not careful, can keep me from interacting even with people I love.

If you asked most people in the churches where I have served as pastor, other than those who know me really well, they are surprised I am an introvert based on my Sunday interactions with people. I’m very extroverted on Sundays. 

So how do I do it?

Here are a few thoughts for the introverted pastor.

If you are an introverted pastor, you have to be intentional.

You have to work at it. I’m not saying it will be easy, but is anything worthwhile ever easy? I realize that Sunday is coming. I plan my week around it. I have lots of introverted time during my week. For example, I am very careful what I plan for Saturday night because I know I need to be at my best for Sunday. It is rare for me to schedule a large social gathering on Saturday nights, for example. In fact, I’ve found that my and Cheryl’s Saturday date days are the perfect preparation for an extroverted Sunday. (Obviously that’s easier for us now as empty-nesters, but I was equally protective of my Saturday nights when we had children at home.)

If you are an introverted pastor, your family will have to cooperate.

This is the hardest one because it obviously involves other people. The key for us is that my family knows me as I know them. They understand that Sunday takes so much out of me mentally and physically. They realize I need time to recover from a very extroverted Sunday. The ride to the restaurant for Sunday lunch is usually pretty quiet. Over the years, when the boys were home and now that it’s just Cheryl and me, my family has learned that if I have my introverted recovery time, I’m more engaging with them the rest of the day. It is a way they partner with me in ministry. (I sense a need to clarify. My family understands my introversion—but I don’t think they ever feel slighted because of it. That takes intentionality too.)

If you are an introverted pastor, realize it’s for a purpose.

When I taught a very large Sunday school class (over 100 people), every week I’d leave the room as I was praying at the close of my lesson. It seemed the humble thing to do, and I was sincere in that, but honestly, it was the “safest” approach for this introvert. When I came into ministry and was in my first church, I continued this practice. I would “escape” during my prayer to the back of the sanctuary. A dear older deacon pulled me aside one day. He gently, in a very helpful way, said, “Ron, if as you’re praying you’ll walk to the vestibule and be there to shake people’s hands as they leave, they’ll be more likely to return the next week.” I’ve been doing that ever since—and how right he was. One of the most frequent comments I receive from visitors is how they enjoyed meeting the pastor. I can’t imagine it any other way now. It fuels me and them. I remain thankful for the wisdom of that deacon.

If you are an introverted pastor, rely on Holy Spirit help.

The pastor that inspired me most in my spiritual walk when I was a 20-something-year-old trying to figure out my life direction emailed me recently. He had read one of my introversion posts and wanted to echo the sentiments in it. He said he has always marveled at how many introverted pastors he has seen God call to lead in the church—even very large churches. He wrote, “I’ve been an introverted pastor of large churches for 39 years now. Before every service, I’m saying the same thing, ‘God, I can’t do this—now what are you going to do about that?!’” His humble surrender to God’s hand has shaped some powerful ministries under his leadership. I loved being able to email back to one of my mentors that I’ve had a similar prayer every Sunday—for a few less years.

Just as Moses, Gideon and others led through what they felt would handicap them in following God’s call, introverted pastor, you can do this. With God’s help, an understanding family, and some hard, purposeful, intentional work—if God has called you to it, He will equip you. Surrender to His strength and will.

And, the reward is worth it!

Videos, Documents Uncovered Showing Patterson’s Coverup of Abusive Pastor

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Videotapes and letters from almost 30 years ago are providing insights into how a prominent Southern Baptist leader defended and tried to rehabilitate a popular but predatory pastor. In its ongoing investigation into sexual-abuse coverups in America’s largest Protestant denomination, the Houston Chronicle this week described the newly unearthed documents.

According to the paper’s review of letters, interviews, and almost five hours of tapes, former Southern Baptist Convention (SBC) president and seminary president Paige Patterson “personally investigated and downplayed” abuse claims against Darrell Gilyard, a pastor he’d mentored. The items also show how Patterson and others attempted to blame and silence Gilyard’s accusers while maintaining the pastor’s reputation and career.

Patterson Defended Darrell Gilyard as a “spokesman of God” 

Gilyard received national attention when televangelist Jerry Falwell featured his “miracle story”—including a background of homelessness that was later questioned. Though Gilyard lacked pastoral training, his charismatic delivery earned him the title of “the black Dr. Vines,” referring to Jerry Vines, another former SBC president who mentored him.

In the late 1980s and early 1990s, allegations against Gilyard emerged from several SBC churches he served in Texas and Oklahoma. Even after Gilyard confessed to some claims and resigned from Victory Baptist Church near Dallas in 1991, tapes show Patterson defended Gilyard and spoke about “sins” committed by his accusers, who were “not innocent either.”

Patterson hailed Gilyard as “a spokesman of God” and “one of the most brilliant men who has ever stepped into the pulpit.” He asked church members not to publicly discuss the situation—something Patterson also did in 1987, when Gilyard resigned from another Dallas-area Baptist church after 20 women accused him of inappropriate sexual behavior.

In a 1987 letter to E.K. Bailey, pastor of Concord Missionary Baptist Church, Patterson urged Bailey to “forget the past” and keep quiet while Patterson tried to “rehabilitate the gifted young preacher” from “mistakes.” Patterson wrote that Gilyard “is no longer a problem to you” and “is worth salvage,” asking Bailey “not to disparage him any further.”

That year, partly due to recommendations from Patterson, Gilyard was hired at Hilltop Baptist Church in Norman, Oklahoma. More accusations soon arose, and in a 1989 letter, Patterson admitted to Hilltop’s co-pastor, Dan Maxwell, that it had been “unwise” to promote Gilyard until he’d learned “lessons of life that are important.” Patterson also indicated that any allegations against Gilyard needed to be substantiated by two or more witnesses.

Patterson promised to monitor Gilyard, who was directed to see Dallas counselor Don Simpkins in the late ’80s. During a meeting with eight accusers, Gilyard, and Patterson, Simpkins says Patterson focused on the women’s pasts and frightened them out of pressing charges. The counselor called the situation “a dog and pony show,” saying Patterson stopped taking his calls after Simpkins told him Gilyard “needed to be removed from ministry.”

Gilyard Continued Preaching But Eventually Was Convicted

Gilyard continued to gain popularity, however, and preached at the SBC pastors’ conference in 1989 and 1991. At Victory, allegations of sexual misconduct continued. The newly discovered tapes feature comments from Martha Dixius, a social worker at Victory, who describes Gilyard’s accusers as traumatized and “hurting.” Dixius, now deceased, says in the tape: “There is a lot of depression… It is eating [the women] alive.”

After his 1991 resignation, Gilyard headed to Jacksonville, Florida. In 1996, the insurer of Gilyard’s church paid $300,000 to settle sexual misconduct allegations against him.

Patterson eventually cut ties with Gilyard. Vines, who’d once written that Gilyard shouldn’t be leading a church, wrote in his autobiography that he “had no other option but to forgive” Gilyard after the pastor admitted “moral failings” to him about 2003. Five years later, Vines wrote that he saw “the first sign that I had been misled” by Gilyard.

In 2009, Gilyard was convicted of sex crimes against two Florida teenagers and served a three-year prison sentence. He also faced several civil lawsuits. Upon his 2012 release, Gilyard began pastoring another SBC church in Jacksonville after a judge adjusted his sex offender probation terms. When news broke that children had to be kept out of worship services at Christ Tabernacle Missionary Baptist Church, the SBC broke ties with that congregation.

What Is ‘The 1619 Project’ and What Are People Saying About It?

1619 project
©John D. and Catherine T. MacArthur Foundation- used with permission

The New York Times recently published an initiative called “The 1619 Project,” a collection of essays, short fiction and poems that attempts to “reframe” the history of the U.S. by demonstrating that slavery is central to the country’s development and still impacts American lives today. While many have welcomed the project, it has also received pushback from some who feel it is either misguided or promoting a false narrative.

“In August of 1619, a ship appeared on [the] horizon, near Point Comfort, a coastal port in the British colony of Virginia,” reads the project’s opening statement. “It carried more than 20 enslaved Africans, who were sold to the colonists. No aspect of the country that would be formed here has been untouched by the years of slavery that followed. On the 400th anniversary of this fateful moment, it is finally time to tell our story truthfully.”

What Is The 1619 Project?

The 1619 Project is the brainchild of New York Times journalist, Nikole Hannah-Jones. In an interview with Joshua Johnson on NPR’s 1A, Jones explained that the initiative was a “culmination of more than 25 years of me thinking about that date.” She had never been taught in school that slavery had existed in America before the pilgrims arrived at Plymouth Rock, and “I just kept thinking that [the date] was going to pass in most American households, and no one was going to even know that there was an anniversary that we should be commemorating.”

It is Jones’ belief and the thesis of the project that “nothing in modern American society has been left untouched by that decision to buy that first group of 20 to 30 Africans and engage in the institution of slavery.” Isn’t it true, asked Johnson, that Americans already know slavery is significant and has affected our lives and history? Jones said no, but that in reality, we think of slavery as being “marginal” and a product of the South. Rather than being marginal, she believes it was and is central to the American experience.

Jones makes two claims in the interview and in her opening essay for The 1619 Project that some might find controversial. One is that the Constitution, before it was amended, was an inherently undemocratic document. Another is that one of the colonists’ possible motivations for revolting against the English was to protect the institution of slavery (which Britain was moving away from at the time).

“At our founding, we were not a democracy,” Jones told Johnson, because the Constitution denied the right to vote to women, black people, Native Americans, and even white people who did not own property. In her essay, she points out the hypocrisy of the colonists expressing outrage against British subjugation even while many of them owned slaves or at least profited from the insitution of slavery. She wrote, “As Samuel Johnson, an English writer and Tory opposed to American independence, quipped, ‘How is it that we hear the loudest yelps for liberty among the drivers of Negroes?’”

Slavery was key to our founding, said Jones, but “We absolutely don’t think of slavery as foundational. We think of it as kind of a blip, a mistake that we made, but that doesn’t have larger ramifications for everyday American life–and the reaction to this project, I think, is evidence of that.”

What Have the Reactions Been to The 1619 Project?

Responses to Jones’ project have ranged from thankfulness to wonder at why it is necessary to accusations of falsehood. On Fox and Friends, Newt Gingrich called the initiative “a lie” and on Twitter said it was propaganda.

Johnson read a comment by one person who said the project was another example of Democrats hating the U.S, and radio host and blogger Erick Erickson said it minimized what white people did to free slaves. He also criticized the Times for handing the initiative mainly to opinion writers. Jones corrected this statement in a tweet where she said there was only opinion writer on the project and multiple scholars (whom she listed).  

Southern Baptist Convention president J.D. Greear posted a series of tweets highlighting the 1619 anniversary and said, “If the church is to change our nation’s story for the future, we must begin by knowing and owning the story of our past.”

While some responded in support of Greear’s sentiment, quite a few pushed back on it for various reasons. Notably, a recent Barna study found that pastors and church leaders are more likely than other Christians to see slavery as something that still impacts people today.

Many people, black and white, have expressed gratitude for The 1619 Project. Because the initiative emphasizes how black Americans have shaped the U.S. by fighting for democracy, Jones said she has heard from many who have told her they now feel a sense of pride in their heritage instead of shame that they descended from slaves.

She told Johnson, “So many black people who have responded said that this has changed the way that they feel about themselves as Americans, and I think that’s probably the response that has meant that most to me.”

3 Lessons From a Vineyard Farmer About Your Growth

thank you notes for children’s ministry volunteers

Lessons From a Vineyard Farmer: In John 15 when Jesus told His disciples that He is the true vine and they were the branches, He assured them that those who abide in Him would produce fruit because of their connection to Him. Judas, His betrayer, had already departed and thus proved to not really belong to Jesus – to be a branch that was removed. And Jesus promised that those who remained would be pruned.

I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. Every branch in me that does not produce fruit he removes, and he prunes every branch that produces fruit so that it will produce more fruit. [John 15:1-2]

I don’t always like this verse because I don’t particularly like to be pruned. Admittedly, I am often comfortable with my current level of fruit and there have been times where the pruning has felt like too much.

I asked a farmer I know about this passage. He owns a large vineyard and sells to forty different wine companies. I better understand the illustration now.

Here are three lessons from a vineyard farmer about how God grows us spiritually:

Lessons From a Vineyard Farmer #1. Pruning is necessary for this season AND next season.

The farmer told me that pruning causes the branches to bear fruit in the current season and the following season. Future fruit is the result of today’s pruning.

Lessons From a Vineyard Farmer #2. To the untrained eye, the pruning can seem excessive.

The farmer told me that if I showed up and watched the pruning, I would likely think it was too much. It can look like something is being done to the plants, but something is being done for the plants. In the midst of pruning, God is not doing something to us. He is doing something for us.

Lessons From a Vineyard Farmer #3. The grape that suffers the most produces the wine that tastes the best.

In vineyard terms, this is called the “skin to juice ratio,” and to increase that ratio, the farmer puts stress on the branches. Stress is the term he used, and we know that reality well. The premium wines stored in Dunavox Wine Coolers all come from branches that have been stressed. Many times, I prefer to be a cheap bottle of wine but God wants more for me. For you too.

The really good news of this passage is the liberating truth that we don’t make the fruit. The fruit shows in our lives but we are not the ones who cause the fruit. He is. We are merely branches, and the Vine gives us all we need for life and godliness. We simply abide in Him.

This article about lessons from a vineyard farmer originally appeared here.

No Man Fails on Purpose

thank you notes for children’s ministry volunteers

The church—no doubt YOUR church—is engaged in a lot of good, important work. Churches are busy mentoring youth, feeding the poor, visiting the sick, counseling hurting people, preparing couples for marriage, and much more. It’s not difficult to see why ministry to men often takes a back seat to other ministries, especially when you consider that men are often the hardest group to engage. But a recent story shared by one of our female staff members is a vivid reminder of why men’s discipleship is critical work. And it centers on one searing truth: No man fails on purpose. This is her story…

“No man fails on purpose.” I’ve heard Patrick Morley often share this truth many times and it’s always resonated with me—for both its simplicity and its depth. The pain contained in its layers has been known by many wives, daughters, sisters, and mothers. But another victim—”patient zero,” if you will, in this epidemic of disappointment—is the man himself, who had big dreams and good goals and a longing to leave a legacy.

I am one of those daughters, and my dad was one of those men.

My childhood was a whirlwind of fort-building, birthday parties, art projects, softball games, and music, and my dad stood at the center of it all. The woman I am today is a direct result of that whirlwind. I grew up to be confident because of my parents’ endless encouragement. I grew up to be strong-willed because of the freedom they gave me to have my own opinions and desires. Friendly because my dad modeled it daily to strangers. And able to love because I never doubted I was loved.

And it wasn’t just the assurance I was unconditionally loved by them, but that I was unconditionally loved by God. When I look back, I don’t remember ever not knowing about Jesus. I vividly recall the car rides on Sunday mornings to the church on the lake downtown. We’d listen to Casey Kasem’s Top 40 with the windows down—the breeze causing my hair to dance around my face.

I would wonder excitedly what the kids’ lesson was going to be in “big church,” after which we’d run off to children’s church, quarters clutched in our hands that my parents had given us for the offering. There, we’d play and learn and end the morning with cookies and red punch—a close second to salvation in my five-year-old mind. Then we’d meet back up with my parents, my dad often in his suit jacket, smelling like the aftershave I loved.

My favorite church memories are the Christmas Eve and Christmas services, when we’d all dress up and my dad would hold me on his lap so I could see over the grownups’ heads to watch the bell ringers. Then he’d hold my candle for me during Silent Night so that the hot wax wouldn’t drip on my fingers.

But among the memories, I have no recollection of ever seeing my dad with a friend at church. Not once. No recollection of saying goodbye to him as he left for a men’s small group. No recollection of running into the store with him so he could pick up hot dog buns for a cookout. No recollection of pulling on his suit jacket to stop talking so we could go to lunch. No recollection of him praying with another man during a difficult time, like when he struggled through the death of his father, taking long walks at night by himself.

And when he stopped coming with us to church, I have no recollection of anyone asking why or where he was or if he was coming back.

Eventually, my dad did find the community that he’d been missing—at first on volleyball and softball teams. With his teammates, he shared laughs and a sense of purpose and camaraderie. And we would go to his games when we could and cheer him on.

Then his health began to change with age, making it tougher to play sports, and so instead, he found community in the bar of the restaurant next door to his work. For the next two decades, that journey would result in alcohol slowly stripping him of everything that mattered—everything except for the tired love of his family, who knew instinctively, bitterly, achingly: no man fails on purpose.

 This is the part where I’d love to insert an inspirational redemption story for you. A late-in-the-game comeback that leaves us all cheering wildly on our feet. But that isn’t how this one ends. My parents divorced, he took early retirement, his health deteriorated, and he lost his battle with addiction because he tried to do it alone, without men around him, on his terms.

In February of 2017, right after my daughter had fallen asleep, there was a knock on my door. A police officer clumsily told me my dad had been found dead of a heart attack or stroke in his apartment, alone. Family photos and beer cans surrounded him. He was 63 years old.

There’s a lot I’ll never understand. But I do know three things:

  1. My dad loved me like crazy to the best of his imperfect ability.
  2. He didn’t fail on purpose. No, my softball team-coaching, homework-helping, Easter egg-dyeing, bicycle-riding, music-writing father never set out to run his life off the rails.
  3. AND THIS ONE IS IMPORTANT—the church didn’t fail on purpose either. But the church did fail.

That’s why Man in the Mirror exists to help churches disciple every man—every hurting men, every man on the fringe, every man still searching, every exhausted leader. Because this weekend, in churches across your community and mine, men are going to show up for the last time. They are going to sit among hundreds of men without being truly known by one. And they will walk out and away, unseen. They might find the community they crave elsewhere, but it may be at a blackjack table, or in a bar, or a soul-sucking career, or a woman’s arms who isn’t their wife.

For me, men’s discipleship isn’t just a way to get the church parking lot pressure-washed, or a line-item at the bottom of the church budget. It’s much more than an excuse to eat pancakes on Saturday twice a year. It is LIFE SAVING. It is dad saving.  

Sure, no man fails on purpose, but you know what else? No man succeeds by accident either. The Christian man succeeds because he has other men intentionally discipling him and caring enough that when they see their brother playing in speeding traffic, they aren’t too polite to jump up and down and SCREAM at him to get out of the road.  

Today, by God’s grace, my story and my family’s story is being written differently now because my husband has deep, meaningful relationships with other Christian men. But it could have gone the other way.

After a devastating emotional blow in his mid-twenties, my husband isolated himself from his friends and from the church where he’d grown up. He started to turn to other, lesser things in an effort to cope. He often says he doesn’t know if he’d still be walking with Christ today had it not been for a guy friend who wouldn’t let him slip away. This friend spent hours talking with him, praying with him, bringing him to his church, insisting he crash on his couch on tough nights, and showing him grace with no strings attached. Right there, in the midst of the most pain he’d ever known, this friend discipled him.

Eventually, my husband got plugged into a church again, where he could grow with other men and learn to lead his future family—our family—well. Now, when I hear him praying with our daughter in her bed at night, sometimes my thoughts travel back to when I was her age—same brown hair; same big, round eyes; same giggles and soft prayers. Before my dad would leave my room, he wouldn’t tuck me in. No, he’d throw the bed sheet up to the ceiling and let it float down slowly, magically like a parachute, delighting me every time.

He couldn’t have known then, kissing his daughter goodnight, all that his decisions were going to cost him. No man fails on purpose. May we all stand together and be a part of the movement to help men succeed. On purpose, for His purpose, in Jesus’ name.

The BIG IDEA: No man fails on purpose, but no man succeeds by accident either.The Christian man succeeds because he has other men caring enough to intentionally disciple him.

This article about no man fails on purpose originally appeared here.

Cross-Cultural Missions Is Not the Cure for Wanderlust

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Cross-cultural missions is not about travel.

In Beauty and the Beast, Belle dreams of another life, runs up a hill, flings open her arms and sings, “I want adventure in the great, wide somewhere! I want it more than I can tell!” Even as an adult, this scene takes my breath away. I have the J .R. R. Tolkien quote, “Not all who wander are lost,” plastered on one wall and a map with all the places I’ve visited hanging on another.

I admit it. I suffer from chronic wanderlust. However, currently the Lord has called me to the busy yet mostly routine life of a PhD student. When my longings to travel surface, I sometimes face the temptation to view cross-cultural missions as the answer. But cross-cultural missions is not the cure for wanderlust.

Don’t get me wrong. Wanderlust is not inherently bad. I believe that God gives many of us a desire to travel and a passion for other cultures and experiences as part of our callings to mission.  But when considering an cross-cultural missions experience, whether long-term or short-term, we cannot choose to go simply because we are scratching an itch.

“We must go on God’s mission as committed servants compelled by love for God and love for the nations.”

We must go on God’s mission as committed servants compelled by love for God and love for the nations. If wanderlust is our only impetus for missions, we run the risk of throwing in the towel before the job is done. But how do we know if we are treating missions as the cure to wanderlust?

Here are three questions to consider with cross-cultural missions.

How do we respond to the unfavorable or the mundane?

With wanderlust, we are always chasing the next mountaintop experience. We find joy in the newness of the next journey. Although we may revel in the moment while it’s happening, the shine wears off quickly, and we soon start planning our next adventure. Many times, wanderlust is the siren calling us to the new and the exotic, the exciting and the beautiful.

Cross-cultural missions isn’t always breathtakingly beautiful environments or adrenaline-filled adventures. The Lord often leads us to the poverty stricken, smog-filled, and overlooked places that wanderlust would never take us. Instead of buying into the illusion of comfort, we look boldly into the dirty, ugly, sinful parts of our world and take Christ’s message there.

Cross-cultural missions also demands faithfulness in the mundane. While we may move to a new culture and see exotic places, God’s mission asks us to stay when we itch to leave. God calls us to be faithful as we figure out public transportation, the banking system, social cues, how to interact with our neighbors, and how to respond to conflict.

God sometimes puts us in the middle of incredible adventures that clearly illustrate that he is at work. Other times, he asks us to be faithful as we figure out the trash system in our new context. He asks us to persevere, even when we aren’t seeing the results of our labor. God’s mission requires dedication in life’s normal routines.

Whose glory are we seeking?

Social media has compounded wanderlust. We see others travel and we want to travel. We see the beautiful vistas, the crazy foods, and the adventures of others, and we long for our own. But the other side of the equation can be true also. When we travel, we go in search of the perfect picture: the selfie that instills awe and wonder in our friends, the vista that brings twinges of jealousy, or the flawless posed photo that makes even our casual acquaintances wish they were with us. We seek our own glory.

“Missions is not about our glory. It’s about God’s. It’s not about making our names known in the social media world but making his name known among the nations.”

Cross-cultural missions, however, is not about our glory. It’s about God’s. It’s not about making our names known in the social media world but making his name known among the nations. When we go on mission, we join the psalmist and proclaim, “Not to us, Lord, not to us but to your name be the glory, because of your love and faithfulness” (Ps. 115:1 NIV).

How do we view people on the journey?

Our pursuit of wanderlust can lead to subconsciously depersonalizing the people we meet on our journey. Instead of viewing them as image bearers of our Lord, we see them as part of the scenery, oddities to entertain us, or servants expected to make our experience the best it can be.

When we participate in God’s mission, God calls us to see people as innately worthy of our respect and love. We value our taxi driver, not simply because he gets us to our location but because he is created in God’s image and needs to hear the truth of the gospel. We care for the lost and the downtrodden in our new home. We humbly walk alongside national believers from the culture in which we work, valuing their input, allowing them to sharpen our faith, and mutually partnering with them to further the gospel. Instead of demanding service, we love and serve.

Is a desire to travel wrong? Absolutely not. But it cannot be the only motivation for our participation in God’s mission. Instead, we go because we are compelled by our love for God and his glory. We go because we desire to make his name known among those who have never heard. We go because we are captivated by his love for the nations. We go because our Lord commands. And we stay for the same reasons.

This article about cross-cultural missions originally appeared here.

4 Ways to Rally Your Small Group for Fall

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It’s time to rally your small group for fall. For most small groups, the summer is just a different time. Some groups take breaks for the summer months. Others change their meeting schedules to accommodate graduations and vacations. Regardless how your small group has been approaching the summer season, it’s time to start thinking about how you’ll transition back into the fall season.

Here are four tips to rally your small group for fall:

Anticipate Change to rally your small group for fall.

Every year brings new challenges and new schedules. Recognize that this new season is an opportunity to adjust the way your group has been meeting. Mondays may not be the best meeting day for everyone anymore. It’s possible that all of your kids are old enough that you won’t need to arrange for childcare. It’s likely that some people will drop out of your group while others will join. Your group is much more than its meeting day, location, curriculum, or childcare. As you look to the fall, don’t assume everything will be the same as it was. Anticipate changes and start to dream about the new ways your group can engage with one another and experience Jesus this season.

Connect relationally to rally your small group for fall.

The weeks leading up to a new season provide a great chance to check in with each person from your group. This can be as simple as a phone call or a quick conversation before/after a weekend service. Contacting each member directly rather than sending a group text or email communicates the love and care you have for them individually and the value that they bring to the group. This is especially true if you’re coming out of a summer break and haven’t contacted your group for some time.

Set a date to rally your small group for fall.

If you’ve contacted everyone and it seems like the same meeting time and location is still the best option, your first gathering of the season may just be the kick off of your regular meeting schedule for the season. If you’re having a hard time getting everyone on the same page, and it looks like your group will have to make some adjustments, start with a single date on the calendar. Gather as many people from your group as can come and make a plan for the season. Make it fun by throwing a BBQ or dessert potluck and giving everyone a chance to give their input. By doing this, you’ll avoid accommodating everyone’s schedules and needs over phone, email, or facebook. You’ll also gain buy-in from your group as they have the opportunity to speak into the plans for the season.

Invite people to rally your small group for fall!

Each fall, I hear from a number of group leaders: “I’m not sure if our group is meeting this season. We just don’t have enough people.” My response is always encouraging those leaders to build their group the same way they did when they first began. Invite neighbors, friends, and co-workers. Look for people sitting alone at a weekend service and ask if they’ve found a group. Fall is a season of beginnings. Utilize that momentum to build your group and give more people a space to be known and cared for.

This article about how to rally your small group for fall originally appeared here.

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