Too Good to Be True

January 24, 2019

The word rolls off our tongue so easily.

Good.

“Wow, this cereal is so good!”
“We had a good time at the park.”
“Let me tell you where to get a good cup of coffee.”
“Sam is a really good husband.”

It’s become such a familiar and mundane word in our vocabulary that our mind doesn’t take the time to consider the content. So when we read that God is good, what’s meant to happen inside our soul doesn’t always happen.

“Truly God is good to Israel” – Psalm 73:1. When you read the words “God is good,” your heart should be filled with many things: wonder, amazement, gratitude and humility, to name a few.

But I am convinced that many of us live day after day with no wonderment whatsoever. We exist for weeks, maybe even months, without being amazed. We walk through life without an overwhelming sense of gratitude. We handle our situations, locations and relationships with an attitude of entitlement.

This is the opposite of the way we were created to live. We were meant to live with eyes gazing upward and outward. We were designed to live with hearts that are searching and hungry (and being satisfied in God).

Every word we speak, every action we take, every decision we make, and every desire we entertain was meant to be influenced by our awe of God’s goodness.

But because of sin, few things impress us anymore. Or, at least, the wrong things are the ones that make the biggest impression.

When sin takes your amazement away, you’ll look for ways to fill the void. And if you’re not getting your sense of wonder vertically from the Creator, you will look for it somewhere in the creation.

Has it happened to you? Are you shopping for the buzz of wonder where it simply won’t be found?

That new restaurant will blow your taste buds away, but it won’t introduce you to the soul-satisfying wonder of God. That new car will transport you in luxury for a while, but it has no capacity whatsoever to transport your soul to a place of peace. Your new job title might impress your friends and family at first, but it cannot supply you with the glory that you’re seeking.

Asaph, the Psalmist, uncovers what we’re all looking for in a single word:

“Good”

We’re looking for pure, unadulterated, imperishable, unending and unfailing good. Good that only God can provide. Good that we want and need.

Truly, God is good in every possible way. Good in:

Righteousness
Power
Grace
Faithfulness
Provision
Mercy
Holiness
Justice
Anger
Sovereignty

All his words are good. All his actions are good. When he gives, he is good. When he takes, he is good.

Nothing in creation is like him. Everything around us is flawed in some way. Even before the Fall, no glory in creation compared to the beauty of the Creator.

No, it’s not too good to be true: God is good all the time and in every way.

That should amaze you every single day!

This article originally appeared here.

11 Ways to Know You’ve Settled for a Mediocre Marriage

Josh Reich

January 24, 2019

It is so sad when I meet a couple that is unhappy. Whether it is stress, finances, kids, in-laws or sin, too many couples simply settle for a mediocre marriage. They carry around this look that says, “I’m not happy, but this is as good as it will get.”

I’m sorry, but if I’m going to be in a relationship for the rest of my life, I want it to be better than a sigh followed by, “This is as good as it will get.”

So, how do you know if you are in a mediocre marriage?

Here are 11 ways to know if you have a mediocre marriage or are on your way to one:

1. Your marriage and life revolve around your kids.

I’ve written before about how to know if your kids are more important than your marriage, but if you can answer any of these, you are in trouble.

2. It’s been over a year since you read a book on marriage.

The best way to grow in your marriage is to get around a couple who has a better marriage or read a book on it. You should read at least one book on marriage a year. It’s a great way to create conversation and push issues to the surface in your marriage.

3. Roles in marriage feel like a trap instead of freedom.

Headship and submission are tricky things and controversial. They are meant to bring us freedom, not to be a trap. When they feel like a trap, there is sin under it. Whether in how it is playing out or how our heart feels about it.

4. You can’t remember the last date night you had.

I can’t tell you how important date night is. It doesn’t have to be grand or expensive, but as a couple, you need to have at least one time a week where it is just the two of you (no phone, no TV, no computer, no kids) to talk about building into your relationship.

5. You have sex less than two times a week.

I realize this isn’t a hard and fast rule. Pregnancy, health, age, travel, deployment, etc. all can get in the way of this. That being said, sex is a great barometer of your marriage. In every situation when I talk to a couple struggling in their marriage, sex is the first thing to go. It reveals past hurts, addictions, abuses, etc. Every study also says the same thing, a healthy marriage has a healthy sex life.

6. You nit pick at your spouse.

I talked in more detail about this here, but disrespecting your spouse, making fun of them, being sarcastic is one of the fastest ways to move from a good marriage to mediocre to miserable or divorced.

7. You consistently talk about how much you love your spouse on Facebook.

I’m sure you’ll disagree, but every time I read something incredibly awesome on Facebook, my first thought is, “That’s probably the exact opposite of the truth.” I can’t tell you how many times I have counseled a couple who seemed on the verge of divorce and the next day posted on Facebook, “I love my wife.” Or, “My husband is incredible.” The charade of Facebook reveals a lot.

8. When you are alone with your spouse, you have nothing to talk about.

Whenever Katie and I go out to eat and see a couple just sitting there, our hearts break. That’s so sad. It means a couple has stopped growing. Yes silence is great sometimes and needed, but when it is a consistent pattern, that’s a mediocre marriage. You know if this is you.

9. There are things in your past your spouse does not know.

Your spouse should know everything about you. That doesn’t mean you need to tell your spouse how many sexual partners you’ve had or how much porn you saw as a teenager. That isn’t helpful. They should know about addictions, hurts, abuse against you. No one on the planet should know more about you than your spouse.

10. You fantasize about being married to someone else.

Our imaginations are powerful, our memories are powerful. Often, we will think back to high school or college and wonder where someone is or what life would have been like if we married someone else. When that happens, we disengage from our marriage.

11. A friend knows more about your marriage than your spouse does.

Are you honest with your spouse? Do you talk about what bothers you or do you sweep it under the rug? Do you know how to fight well in your marriage? Do you talk more to a friend more than you do to your spouse about your marriage or kids? If so, well you get it by now.

This article originally appeared here.

3 Resources to Help You in Ministry

Matt Morgan

January 24, 2019

As a new ministry year begins, many of us are looking for ways to be more effective in our mission. From shopping lists for kids ministry to important meetings with church leadership, we are like jugglers with a million things in the air. I’ve come to realize that Children’s Ministry leaders are some of the most productive people in the world, but I also know we can become tired and overwhelmed with all there is to do. With that in mind, I wanted to share three resources to help you in ministry.

Church Metrics

Church Metrics is a free tool from Life Church to help with tracking the important measurables in ministry. You can use this tool to track anything, but it comes preloaded with tracking of attendance, salvations, giving and volunteers. It compiles the data and gives a really helpful dashboard to see all the data you’ve inputted.

Our ministry has found this tool valuable for tracking kids’ attendance and new families across all campuses. We can generate charts and graphs to see trends in our kids’ attendance or seasons when guest attendance is higher. These charts help us to schedule our volunteers and plan our ministry to be more prepared and more effective in reaching families and kids.

Mosaico

We all know the struggle to get volunteers and parents to read our emails. Mosaico is a free responsive email template builder. In English, this means a tool for making boring text emails more stylish with graphics, buttons and customized layouts. After you create the email template, it’s easily copied as HTML code and embedded into almost any email client or church database system.

With Mosaico, you can add your ministry logo to an important parent email. You can add screenshots of lessons or photos of crafts to a volunteer email. And most important, you can design the email to highlight the most important information that catches the reader’s eye.

Evernote

Anyone who has ever been in a meeting with me knows that I’m a huge fan of Evernote. Plain and simple, Evernote is a note-taking app, but it’s really much, much more. Evernote helps to organize notes, to-do lists, projects and more by creating separate “notebooks” and allowing you to search for keywords in any note.

For example, I remember having a discussion about photo booth ideas, but I couldn’t remember when that meeting happened, who was in that meeting, or what exactly were the ideas. I just remember that we did talk about it sometime and somewhere! So, I opened Evernote, searched for notes with “photo booth” anywhere in the note, and viola! I found the note with all the ideas, a date when the meeting was held, and who else as with me in the meeting!

Evernote has a free version, but I’m so in love that I use a paid version that allows me to create a new note just by emailing myself, sharing notebooks with others, and turning my notes directly into a super clean, easy-to-use presentation. If you work with a big team, I suggest the Business Plan that allows everyone to have an account and collaborate shared notebooks.

Bonus Resources:
These are resources that I’ve used in the past or am currently attempting to use. They are worth mentioning and may be great tools for what you need!

Task Management: Trello, Asana
Social Media: Buffer, Hootsuite, IFTTT (IF-This-Then-That)
Focus/Productivity: Cold Turkey (Guaranteed to help you focus after you get over the initial shock of being locked out of Facebook!)

This article originally appeared here.

Worship Preferences: When Musical Taste Is a Precondition for Worship

Tim Gough

January 24, 2019

Worship Preferences: When Musical Taste Is A Precondition for Worship

The time of musical worship can be a nightmare to crack! With so many worship preferences, tastes and values in the room it’s amazing that we ever get through it without broken teeth, flying drumsticks or choral tantrums.

Part of the issue is we’re just so darn picky!

I, for instance, am really cynical about ’90s-’00s contemporary worship music. I find it simplistic, boring, messy, boring, poorly written, boring, rubbish to play, boring and theologically…quirky. Is this a fair assessment of all worship music from that era? Probably not. Does it summarize all of that era’s worship? Definitely not! Does it tell me something about my heart? Very yes!

And here’s our problem. The straight line we draw from ‘does this please me’ to ‘does it please God’ is logically absurd!

Our worship should reach in three directions:

Upward. We’re to love and honor God.
Outward. We’re to serve and uplift each other.
Inward. We’re to encourage our silly hearts and tired minds to respond.

Then problem is we tend to add a fourth step, which is, ‘we’re to like the music.’ This totally reverses the process, which ends up looking a little like this:

Double Inward: Am I properly entertained by, and comfortable with, the music provided?
Inward: Do I feel like I can now respond to God?
Outward: Do I feel like I can encourage others to get stuck in?
Upward: Do I feel like God likes what I’m doing?

The problem here is that every stage is now governed by ‘do I feel…?’ which makes worship self-serving rather than God-serving. This is a huge problem when you consider that worship in the Bible always included sacrifice and making ourselves lower.

It’s not entirely this straight forward, but you can see the problem. If our ability to worship is governed by our acceptance of the music provided, then everything stops working.

Put another way: If worship must first reach our conditions, then we won’t be worshipping when they do.

If the music fits us so perfectly that we ‘switch on’ our worship mode, then it’s likely that it isn’t worship that we’re doing. It’s not that you can’t worship to your music preference (of course you can), the problem is making your worship and adoration of God conditional on your music preference. Our love for God shouldn’t be conditional upon anything but His love for us.

How many times have you heard (or thought!) something like:

I can’t worship to an organ.
The music is too loud to worship.
I can’t focus on God because the singer was off-key.
God can’t get through to me though a guitar solo.

etc.

For me—I always lose it if a drummer goes out of time!

Now some of this is simple human distraction—worked on with time and patience. However, these things can be heart issues. It’s a heart issue when we won’t try to worship if our preferences aren’t met.

This article originally appeared here.

Are You Enabling Mindless Worship?

David Manner

January 24, 2019

Are You Enabling Mindless Worship?

If our church services give the impression that worship starts when we start it and ends when we end it; if all worship resources and energies are spent preparing for and presenting a single hour on Sunday; if we aren’t exhorting our congregation and modeling for them how to worship not only when they gather but also when they leave…then we are enabling mindless worship.

In Teaching a Stone to Talk, Annie Dillard wrote, “Why do we people in churches seem like cheerful, brainless tourists on a packaged tour of the Absolute? The tourists are having coffee and doughnuts on Deck C. Presumably someone is minding the ship, correcting the course, avoiding icebergs and shoals, fueling the engines, watching the radar screen, noting weather reports radioed from shore. No one would dream of asking the tourists to do these things.”[1]

Jesus’ greatest commandment was to love God with all our heart, soul, mind and strength, and also love our neighbor as ourselves (Mark 12:30-31). Paul’s exhortation to the church at Philippi was whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy or worth our worship…we should think about such things (Phil 4:8).

Worshiping with our minds allows us to approach worship with knowledge, insight, reason, memory, creativity, inquiry, imagination and even doubt. So if we offer our prayers superficially; if we read and listen to Scripture texts mindlessly; if we gather at the Lord’s Supper Table hastily; and if we only sing our songs emotionally, the end result is often mindless worship.

We could learn a lot from the Jews who believe the Sabbath begins at sundown. Then the activities and things with which we fill our minds the night before we gather could better frame our worship attitudes on the Sabbath.

My daughter was five years old the first time our family vacationed at Disney World. After months of planning and days of travel, the final preparations for and anticipation of the first day at Magic Kingdom was almost too much excitement for her to contain.

Like a firefighter, she selected and laid out her clothes the night before so she could jump into them the next morning. Sleep eluded her with the anticipation of what was to come. She awakened early, quickly dressed and inhaled breakfast so she would be ready to depart hours before the park even opened.

All conversation traveling from our resort to the park entrance centered on what she would observe, experience, eat, participate in, enjoy and then take home at the end of the day. She had been thinking about it, dreaming of it, planning, preparing and longing for it. Her mind was so filled with it she couldn’t contain the anticipation.

Empowering instead of enabling worshipers encourages them to think, behave or take action autonomously. It gives them the permission to take ownership in their own worship responses to God’s revelation at the moment in which it occurs. Worship empowerment arises from the shallowness of dependency and leads to the full conscious, active and continuous participation of each worshiper.

Worship that doesn’t require us to think is superficial. Worship or love of God and others must be continuous or it becomes self-serving. And it can’t be continuous unless we think about it, consider it, process it, meditate on it, study it and learn how to get better at it in order to better teach others how to do it. So until we move beyond just waiting for the song set to enable us to worship, we’ll never encourage deep calling unto deep worship that also engages our minds.

[1] Annie Dillard, Teaching A Stone to Talk (New York: Harper Perennial, 2008), 52.

This article originally appeared here.

7 Common Group Frustrations

Ron Edmondson

January 24, 2019

7 Common Group Frustrations

With every team or organization I have led there have been people who get frustrated with someone else on the team. In full disclosure, sometimes others have been frustrated with me.

Frustration is common among relationships. It happens within the healthiest of families—and the healthiest of teams. We certainly shouldn’t strive to frustrate others, but we shouldn’t be surprised when we do.

I have learned there are some actions that can frustrate people faster than others. This might be a good time to do some self-reflection. As you read these, don’t be quick to think of others—although certainly there will be some of this too—but consider your own actions when you (or I) may frustrate people on your team.

Here are seven ways we frustrate other team members:

Promising to do something and not following through.

One of the quickest ways to frustrate people is to make a commitment and then not do what was promised. People are depending on each other on a team. When one person “drops the ball”—especially consistently—it impacts everyone. The Scripture says it something like this: “Let your yes be yes and your no be no.” It’s better to commit to less and complete them than to take on assignments and never see them to the end.

Saying one thing to one person and something different to another.

Healthy teams are built on trust. Trust is developed with time and consistency. No one likes a people-pleaser. This person is often popular for a time, but they lose favor as soon as they’re found out to be two-sided in their opinions.

Never being serious.

This is the person who embarrasses you by making awkward comments and includes you in them like you are part of it. Teams should be fun, but this person makes everything a joke—and other people are often the brunt of them. They delay meetings with their constant antics. It can be funny for a while, but it wears thin quickly, as it begins to delay progress toward a goal.

Having an excuse for everything.

This is the person who can’t complete the task, but doesn’t want to admit fault, so they blame it on something else—or someone else. They refuse to ever admit fault. There is always a reason. They actually may become frustrated with you if you dare challenge one of their excuses. They expect you to just keep believing them.

Always having a trump story.

You know the type. You went on an exciting adventure—it was a great vacation—and the person who, often before you finish, has to share with you their vacation which was far better than yours. Or, what they accomplished at work is always far superior to what you accomplished. They can’t let anyone receive recognition grander than they receive.

Complaining consistently.

You may be just as frustrated with things at work as everyone else, but the one person who always complains sucks even the slightest joy from the room. They sew negativity into the team and try to bring everyone down to the pit of despair with them. They don’t like the vision, the plan of action or those charged with leading them. They are naysayers. They overreact to everything and blow it out of proportion. These people weigh heavily on the morale of the team.

Only looking out for themselves.

This person really isn’t on the team, because the very definition of team involves shared progress toward a goal. They may be on the team by position, but in actions they are very much independent of others. They look out for themselves first. If they can take advantage of an opportunity—they will—even to the detriment of others.

Let’s build better teams!

Those are just some of the more frequent ones I’ve observed. Have you ever been frustrated by anyone on your team with one of these? Have you been the cause of any of these frustrations?

What are other frustrations you’ve seen people bring to a team?

This article originally appeared here.

Harvest Bible Chapel Elders Admit ‘Failures’ and ‘Shortcomings’

Megan Briggs

January 24, 2019

The elder board of Harvest Bible Chapel addressed the ongoing controversy surrounding the church and its founder, James MacDonald, from the pulpit on Sunday. In a shaky voice, a spokesman for the leadership team announced it was “getting low before the Lord.”

Additionally, the board announced MacDonald agrees “it is wise for him to remain out of all leadership involvement of Harvest Bible Chapel—including preaching at any campus.” This position appears to be an adjustment from a January 16 announcement which said MacDonald may preach at the Naples campus during his “indefinite sabbatical.”

The group of men gathered on stage behind its spokesman, Dan George, and made the announcement to its Chicago-area campuses, but its Naples, Florida, campus did not receive the message, according to journalist Julie Roys. Instead, according to a Naples campus church member who spoke to Roys, “Elder Fred Ananias simply told the congregation that it had been a tough week and that there was a bit of a crisis.”

Roys reported that John Secrest, the Naples campus pastor who was fired last week, allegedly over his voicing concern over MacDonald preaching at his campus, sent an email to Naples members commenting on the lack of communication coming from the leadership at Harvest. “The silence from church leaders has left many confused,” he wrote.

Despite the silence from leaders in Naples, though, the elder announcement to the Chicago campuses made the situation seem like more than “a bit” of a crisis. The elders mentioned several “shortcomings” and “failures” they were now prepared to acknowledge. They articulated a handful of areas in particular that made the group aware they needed to review the decision-making process of the elder board and church leadership in general.

Harvest Bible Chapel Lawsuit, Relational Conflicts, Naples Conflict Addressed

The two areas the board emphasized it is committed to reviewing are as follows:

“Through years of ministry, there have been relational hurts that have not been fully addressed. We desire strongly for reconciliation wherever there are broken relationships in or around our church. We are committed to a process that brings healing.”
“…Reviewing the structure and decision-making process of the elder board, the executive committee and our church leadership. Circumstances surrounding the fallout of Harvest Bible Fellowship, the recent defamation lawsuit, and the termination of the lead pastor of the Naples campus have each revealed shortcomings in the decision-making process of the elder board and church leadership… We will build a team of people to review our current structure.”

The team that will review the leadership structure of Harvest will include “elders, staff, church members and experienced outside counsel” that the group is convinced “will help us move forward in a healthy way.”

The elders are calling the church to pray every week for a month and they are “confident the church will come out stronger.”

In Naples, Secrest has also asked that congregation to pray. “Please be in earnest prayer today and in the coming days, calling on the Lord to bring peace and healing, repentance and reconciliation for His glory. Let us be together on our knees praying for unity,” he asked.

Lauren Daigle Tops Charts, Helps Those in Need

Jessica Lea

January 24, 2019

Lauren Daigle is making headlines again, this time not for saying anything controversial, but for setting records with her music. This week, her hit single, “You Say,” has been at the top of Billboard’s Hot Christian Songs chart for the 26th week in a row. This means that Daigle has tied with Carrie Underwood for being a woman with the longest running single on that particular chart.

“A segment of our audience is familiar with Lauren Daigle from Christian radio, but whether they know her or not, the song connected quickly,” said an assistant radio program director in Minneapolis, according to Billboard.

Growing Success and Giving Back

Daigle has achieved significant success (she’s garnered several Grammy nominations) since her 2015 breakout album, How Can It Be. But it’s really her most recent album, Look Up Child, that has brought her into the national limelight. One way Daigle is using her new-found fame is to help those in need. She has chosen to support Bob Goff’s organization, Love Does, which works to defend human rights and educate children in conflict zones.

In a video Daigle posted on her social media accounts, she says,

When we hit a million followers on Instagram, I had the thought, let’s give back to the community, let’s give back to everybody at large….And at the top of the year, we are giving to Love Does, one of my favorite organizations. I think it’s amazing, the work that they do around the globe.

Daigle has created a poster from pictures on her Instagram account and will donate all the proceeds to Love Does.

Topping the Hot Christian Songs list is not the only record Daigle is setting. “You Say” has crossed over into adult pop radio and broken into the top 40 songs on Billboard’s Hot 100 list. Daigle also came in third on Shazam’s top 10 most shazamed artists for the week of January 14th, beating out Ellie Goulding and Meek Mill.

It’s “A Hit”

What is the reason for her single’s mainstream success? It’s possible Daigle was aided by having vocals that remind listeners of Adele. But there’s no question that people simply like her song. According to Billboard, KHMX Houston’s Program Director, Chase Murphy, said,

We put ‘You Say’ into research to see if our audience was aware of it, since only the Christian station in town was playing it and we share very little audience. Research confirmed that this was a song we needed to embrace sooner rather than later.

Another program director says, “Programmers who are ignoring the song because ‘it came from Christian radio’ are being silly and short-sighted…‘You Say’ sounds great on the air. Quite simply, it has all of the signs of a hit.”

8 Indicators That Your Ministry May Be Drowning You

Charles Stone

January 24, 2019

In the 1992 presidential race Ross Perot coined the phrase “giant sucking sound” to describe his concern that a proposed treaty would cause American jobs to go overseas. I believe it aptly describes how ministry can sometimes feel to church leaders. Every day church ministry demands that we sooth someone’s hurt feelings, solve a ministry problem, seek new ways to grow our churches, or satisfy what seems to be some church members’ increasing expectations. Ministry does feel like a “giant sucking sound” that can suck the life out of us. How do we know if our ministry is drowning us?

Major crises can certainly increase our stress as church leaders. But often lots of small stresses converge at once that unless we see the warning signs, we can end up casualties of ministry. Several years ago several church issues converged at once and I found myself not liking ministry, feeling stressed and not being a very nice person to be around. I had to step back to re-calibrate my life. My first step was to take inventory and define reality.

I’ve listed below what I saw happen to me as I got sucked into ministry stress. As you read these, ask yourself if you can identify with any.

I felt like I was skimming my most important tasks as the senior pastor in an attempt to get to everything else that was screaming for my attention.

I felt so tired when I got home that I wanted to go to bed at 8:30 every night. Sometimes I did.

I easily began to do mind-numbing stuff like check Twitter every hour.

When I went home all I seemed to talk about were the problems at church.

What I’ve always enjoyed doing (looking and dreaming ahead about new ministry ventures) I now had little internal drive and motivation to do.

My daily devotions suffered.

I felt achy all the time.

I felt anger floating just beneath the surface ready to quickly surface when faced with another stress. If you hear that “great sucking sound” in your ministry, I suggest you take inventory as I did as a first step in gaining a healthy balance in ministry.

What have been indicators of that “great sucking sound” in your ministry?

This article originally appeared here.

7 Things Every Leader Needs to Quit Immediately

Ron Edmondson

January 23, 2019

I’ve often wished I could say something to every leader. Some things I’ve learned the hard way through leadership mistakes. I often share things leadership should do, but today I thought I’d share some things not to do.

Some things to quit.

Here are 7 things every leader needs to quit:

Measuring success compared to another’s success.

Your leadership will not be like someone else’s leadership. It’s not designed to be. You’ll likely be successful in ways other leaders aren’t. Some of those may be visible and measurable – some may not be. The goal should be to be the best leader you can be and measure your success by your obedience to being the leader God has designed you to be.

Pretending to have all the answers.

There’s an unfair expectation many leaders face to be the person with the answer in every situation. Seriously, how’s this working for you? The sooner you admit you don’t have all the answers, the quicker your team will be willing to fill in your gaps. And, surrendering is something God values in His followers.

Trying to be popular.

If you want to be popular, be a celebrity. If you want to be a leader, be willing to do the hard tasks to take people where they need (and probably want to go), but may be resistant along the way. Leadership can be lonely at times. Be prepared.

Leading alone.

Just because leadership can be lonely, doesn’t mean you have to lead alone. Good leaders surround themselves with people who care, people who can hold them accountable, and sharpen their character and their faith. If you have a tendency to separate yourself from others, stop now and reach out to someone. Take a bold risk of being vulnerable and release some of the weight of responsibility you feel.

Acting like it doesn’t hurt.

When people you trust betray you it hurts. Be honest about it. When people rebel against your leadership it hurts. On days where it seems you have more enemies than friends it hurts. Don’t pretend it doesn’t. You won’t lead well if you’re a cry baby, but you should have some outlets where you can share your pain.

Trying to control every outcome.

Three reasons not to: 1) It doesn’t work. 2) It limits others. 3) It’s not right. Leadership is not about control. It’s about relational influence. When you control others you limit people to your abilities. When you empower people you limit people to their combined abilities as a team – and – keep in mind, there’s strength in numbers.

Ignoring the warning signs of burnout.

At some point in your leadership, if you really are leading through the deep waters of change, relational differences, or simply the stress of wearing the leader hat, you’ll face burnout. When you start to have more negative thoughts than positive thoughts, when the pressure of leadership is unbearable for a long period of time, or when your leadership starts to negatively impact your physical or emotional health or your relationships, it’s time to seek help.

When Busy Becomes Too Busy: The Essential Business of Staying Connected to Your Heart

Justin Rizzo

January 23, 2019

A few weeks ago, as I was talking with one of my mentors, my answer to a question she asked me left me in pain.

Her question wasn’t new or profound, but my response shocked me.

“Where is your heart in this season?” she asked.

Now, as a “well-trained” pastor’s kid, I immediately opened my mouth to respond with one of the five answers that I typically have ready in my “right-answer” arsenal.

But my heart felt pain because the pat answer wasn’t satisfying. I blurted out the only honest response I could give in that moment: “I don’t know.”

“You don’t know?” she asked.

As she probed further, I began to discover why I gave that answer.

I had gotten too busy.

When Busy Becomes Too Busy: The Essential Business of Staying Connected to Your Heart

I honestly didn’t know what my heart was feeling because I hadn’t taken the time to stop and figure it out. My reasons are probably a lot like yours: busyness with work, school, relationships, pursuing dreams, figuring out finances, spending time and emotional energy putting out fires, and on and on. Charles Hummel appropriately called it “the tyranny of the urgent.”

I knew I had gotten off track and needed to make a change.

I thought about the character trait that had gotten me to this place of excessive busyness. I am a builder. I mean, I love building. Give me an idea and I immediately start thinking about the 10 steps it will take to build it and the structure it will take to sustain it. So while I wanted to celebrate this strength, I also realized (yet again) that it comes with a challenge. My vision, energy and passion to create needed to be reigned in and given boundaries in which to operate.

Something had to go, or at least be moved to the back burner.

So I began to ask myself, What are my negotiables and non-negotiables?

Some of your non-negotiables (things you are committed to no matter what) are probably like mine: your spiritual life, family and work. However, one item I didn’t have as a priority in my life was “me” time. Time for Justin to just sit and figure out what he is even thinking or feeling in that moment.

I talked to a leader in the body of Christ recently who told me that he takes two to three hours a day for “me” time. This is time when he has no scheduled tasks to complete, not necessarily even reading his Bible or doing “spiritual things,” but just being. Thinking. Going out into the woods to walk, staring at a mountain, journaling.

This was missing in my life.

I think the challenge for many of us is giving ourselves permission to take this time for ourselves. It sounds extravagant, like a luxury we can’t afford when there is so much to be done. But I’m learning that it’s actually essential to being healthy, balanced and grounded. No matter how much I’m accomplishing and how many projects I’m checking off my to-do list, without time to navigate through the traffic in my mind, wade through my emotions, and process my thoughts, I am going to be missing out on the peace and satisfaction that come from being connected to my own heart.

I am so grateful to my mentor for asking this question and realizing again the importance of taking the time to pause, to dwell and to feel. I want to learn how to withdraw from the burden of busyness and tune my ear to the whispers of my heart, mind and emotions so that the next time someone asks, “Where’s your heart?” I will have a response that is both informed and genuine.

I would love to hear from you. Are you intentional about taking time for yourself? What do you do and how does it help you?

This article originally appeared here.

7 Churches That Are Often Tough to Pastor

Chuck Lawless

January 23, 2019

Over the years, I’ve worked with a lot of pastors in difficult churches to lead. They’re not impossible—because nothing’s impossible for God (Matt. 19:26)—but they’re still tough to pastor:

7 Churches That Are Often Tough to Pastor

A church led by an entrenched family. They’re on every committee. Their philosophy is simple: “This is our church. We were here before you got here, and we’ll be here when you’re gone.”
A church most recently pastored by a long-term beloved pastor. It’s just hard to walk in the footsteps of a hero. In many cases, the pastor following a hero becomes a de facto interim pastor.
A church unwilling to change as its community changes around them. They ignore their immediate mission field—sometimes even fearing it. Their building becomes a place to retreat from the change rather than a place of renewal to reach the changing world around them.
A church that has been reduced to only a few remaining senior adults. They’re usually loving, godly, sacrificial church members who deeply love their church. It’s tough, though, to bring in needed young families when the church lacks any in the first place.
A church with a history of running off pastors. In some cases, it seems almost tradition to see how long the “new guy” will make it. The church gains a reputation in the community, and they usually live up to it.
A church that never got over its big “split.” Frankly, I’m amazed by how long some church people can hold a grudge. Hit the right nerve in them, and it’s as if they’re right in the middle of the controversy again.
A church with seemingly more committees than attenders. By the time the church approves a decision on something, the question is often no longer relevant. Sometimes, church bureaucracy can get in the way of the spread of the gospel.

So, do we give up on these churches? I don’t think so, for God really can restore them to health. If you’re leading one of these churches, though, don’t walk your road alone. You need the prayerful support of others as you pastor in a hard place.

This article originally appeared here.

Teach Them to Serve Like Jesus

Courtney Kirk

January 23, 2019

As I prayed and reflected on 2018 in children’s ministry, I could not stop thinking, “Jesus came to serve, to teach and to show us the power of God.” Can you imagine a world filled with servant hearts? Am I teaching kids to be like Jesus?

It hit me that, yes, I am teaching them to know their awesome God and to see His power, but I’m not teaching them to serve. Why not? Well, kids do not want to serve, and I am trying to get them through the doors of the church building. Let me say that if this is you, there is nothing wrong with this. In fact, I would start again by making Bible class fun so kids learn best, retain more and want to bring their friends. A few years down the road and I am ready to help my kids grow through service, growing in spirit.

I do not know how this will go. It may be a complete bust, but I am ready to try. With God all things are possible, and I have to believe God will bless a work that trains his children to be his hands and feet. Of course, combining service work with some fun and reminding them of the value in what they are doing should help…I think.

I brainstormed some ways my kindergarten through fifth graders can serve. Here are some ideas I have come up with:

Package meals to take to our sick
Make cards, small gifts or take flowers to shut ins
Package items needed at children’s homes, homeless shelters or others
Invite kids from a children’s home for pizza and games
Cards or care packages for missionaries
Clean the sanctuary
Paint happy stones with a Bible verse on one side and leave along a nature trail during our Spring Break nature walk
Surprise staff, elders and teachers with treats (even for school teachers with a verse for encouragement)

This service work will be outside of Bible classes. I still believe kids need to learn who God is and what he expects of his people. Studying to know God is scriptural. Take the biblical account of King Josiah, for instance. While cleaning up and repairing the temple, the Book of Law that was given to Moses was found. When Josiah heard the words, he knew they had not kept the commandments. He had the words read aloud to the nation so they would know what God expected of them. They had been living in sin, apart from God, because they had poor leadership and did not know the word. We need to be strong leaders for our kids and share God’s amazing plan for us with them.

Please share your ideas, things you have tried or even just thought about. I would love to see a generation grow as servants of Christ. Kids growing up not thinking about how God would want them to “feel,” rather, kids choosing to live like Jesus. Wow!

This article originally appeared here.

How to Motivate Your Small Group Members

Roger Carr

January 23, 2019

How to Motivate Your Small Group Members

Do you find it difficult to motivate your small group members?

You can’t motivate them!

Getting to a High Motivation

According to Susan Fowler, in Why Motivating People Doesn’t Work…and What Does: The New Science of Leading, Energizing and Engaging,your members are always motivated. But the quality of their motivation is what matters. Their quality of motivation can range from being disinterested to having a high level of engagement.

Since your group members are already motivated, can you still have some influence on them reaching a high state of motivation?

Absolutely yes!

The question to ask yourself isn’t whether your members are motivated. The question to ask is WHY their motivation is at the current level.

What Is Needed to Thrive?

Your group members want to thrive. This is the part of motivation we are discussing in this post. In order to thrive, your members need three things:

Autonomy
Relatedness
Competence

This is great news, because small groups typically encourage these things. Your part as a leader is to ensure the group operates in a way that the small group experience fills your members’ needs in each of these areas.

Autonomy

“Autonomy can be defined as the ability to make choices according to one’s own free will. (Whether or not that will is free isn’t relevant here—only that it feels free.) If we feel coerced by even an internal pressure like guilt or shame—to say nothing of external pressures like other people—our feeling of autonomy vanishes.”
Alex Lickerman, M.D., The Desire for Autonomy

Small groups are a terrific venue to support autonomy. Members are encouraged to have authentic conversations. This can only happen when the rest of the group doesn’t try to “fix” them or judge them when they are open and honest.

Discussions that include different perspectives are great. But each individual member must be allowed to make their own choices without others trying to force or threaten to get a different result.

Does your small group operate in a way that supports autonomy?

Relatedness

Your group members need to feel loved and cared for, while at the same time they can do the same for others. This isn’t just a good idea. Experiencing love as both a giver and receiver is needed for your group members to flourish.

What You Need to Know About New York’s New Late-Term Abortion Law

Jessica Lea

January 23, 2019

In a landmark decision, the state of New York has passed the Reproductive Health Act (RHA). The law allows medical practitioners to perform abortions up to the day of the birth, provided “there is an absence of fetal viability, or the abortion is necessary to protect the patient’s life or health.” According to the new law,

Every individual who becomes pregnant has the fundamental right to choose to carry the pregnancy to term, to give birth to a child, or to have an abortion.

What Is Different?

According to the Times Union, under New York’s previous, 49-year-old law, illegal abortions that took place within the third trimester of pregnancy were categorized as felonies. Those who committed one could receive up to seven years in prison. The Buffalo News reports that, under the old law, late-term abortions were only permitted if they were necessary to save the life of the mother. The new law, however, allows abortions after 24 weeks if they are deemed necessary, not merely to save the mother’s life but also to protect her health.

The RHA gets rid of any definition of abortion as a criminal act, categorizing it instead within public health law. The bill also removes some limits on who can perform an abortion. In addition to licensed physicians, now other medical professionals, such as nurse practitioners, physician assistants and certified nurse midwives, can perform one.

According to the new law, these professionals will rely on their “reasonable and good faith professional judgment based on the facts of the patient’s case” in order to decide whether to perform an abortion.

Another notable aspect of the new bill is that in its explanation of homicide, a “person” is defined as “a human being who has been born and is alive.”

This is not the first time New York has attempted to pass the Reproductive Health Act. The bill has failed in the past because it always died in the Republican-controlled Senate. But, says the Times Union, after last year’s midterm elections, Democrats gained a majority, giving them the votes needed to pass the RHA. Driving this newest attempt to pass the bill was fear that Roe v. Wade would be overturned because of President Trump’s recent pro-life appointees to the Supreme Court.

Said Governor Andrew Cuomo, “With the signing of this bill, we are sending a clear message that whatever happens in Washington, women in New York will always have the fundamental right to control their own body.”

The Law’s Impact

Opponents of the bill have a number grave concerns about it, says the Buffalo News. The primary one is that people will broadly interpret the term “health” to include mental and emotional health, significantly increasing the number of late-term abortions in New York.

Another concern is that the new law lessens the consequences for perpetrators of domestic violence who cause pregnant women to lose their babies. State Senator Catharine Young calls the new law’s language “an assault on a woman’s fundamental right to pregnancy.”

A crucial argument for justifying the RHA is that late-term abortions can be necessary in order to protect the life or health of a mother. While this might be true at times, obstetrician and gynecologist Dr. Anthony Levatino says that in nine years of helping women with high-risk, late-term pregnancies, he has saved hundreds of lives, not by performing abortions, but by delivering babies.

While working at Albany Medical Center in Albany, New York, Dr. Levatino saw pregnant women who had conditions such as cancer, heart disease, intractable diabetes and toxemia. It is, he says, much more efficient and effective to attempt to deliver a baby via C-section rather than to perform a late-term abortion, which requires dilating the cervix. That process can take hours or even days, prolonging the danger the mother is in. Says Dr. Levatino, “In all of those years, the number of babies…that I was obligated to deliberately kill in the process was zero, none.”

It remains to be seen how people will interpret and apply the new law. While advocates think it long overdue, State Senator Chris Jacobs sees it as fear-driven and extreme. According to The Buffalo News, he said, “I believe even pro-choice people, if they knew what was in this bill, would not be supportive of it.”

Korean Cult Actively Recruiting in the U.S., Churches Warn

Stephanie Martin

January 23, 2019

As a South Korean cult works to expand its overseas membership, Christians in that country are raising awareness about the dangerous group. Man Hee Lee, also known as the Promised Pastor, or Chairman, founded Shincheonji Church of Jesus—the Temple of the Tabernacle of the Testimony (SCJ) in the 1980s. Since then, the group (sometimes spelled Shinchonji) has used different names and front organizations to recruit members.

Christians in South Korea say that SCJ, faced with declining membership at home, is now using the K-pop music fad to recruit overseas. “Public awareness campaigns launched by Christian groups helped SCJ lose its ground at home,” says the Rev. Shin Hyeon-uk, director of Guri Cult Counseling Center. “But people outside [South Korea] don’t know who they are. Last year alone, [SCJ] was able to recruit 6,000 new members overseas.”

According to estimates, SCJ has more than 200,000 members, about 10 percent of whom are from outside South Korea. Countries with recent waves of SCJ recruitment include China, South Africa, the United States and Germany.

“We’ve seen many people who were victimized by SCJ,” says Pastor Shin. Some former members have sought help from his counseling center, including a “missionary” sent to Turkey. The man was instructed to recruit members by running a Korean cosmetics business, a cultural-exchange café and Korean language classes.

Christians aren’t the only ones in South Korea launching anti-SCJ task forces. Newspapers and TV stations use the Internet and social media to warn people about being indoctrinated by the cult.

The Background and Beliefs of SCJ

Shincheonji is a combination of the Korean words for “new,” “heaven” and “earth.” As a false messiah, Lee claims to supersede Jesus and to be the only one who can explain Revelation. The 82-year-old, who’s previously been accused of tax evasion and sexual harassment, also says he’s immortal. Before starting SCJ, Lee was involved with several other apocalyptic organizations.

SCJ denies the Trinity and claims all humans are angels. In free Bible classes, the group teaches that salvation requires faith in Lee, not Jesus. The Bible is presented as a compilation of metaphors that only Lee can interpret correctly.

After studying Scripture for six months, “students have a clear understanding of God’s will,” SCJ claims. A recent post on the group’s website proclaims: “As evidenced by the 1,032 graduates in Los Angeles and Germany, Shincheonji Church is growing throughout the world.”

Group members are advised against following the news and are taught that any evidence they encounter against their faith is merely testing it. Critics accuse the secretive group of breaking up hundreds of families throughout South Korea.

The cult’s many social events and volunteer efforts, including a large sports festival, contribute to its recruitment success. The organization also goes by many names, adding to confusion about what people are actually joining. Front groups include World Peace, Restoration of Light, Mannam Volunteer Association and Heavenly Culture (HWPL).

SCJ’s Presence in the United States

In America, the epicenter of SCJ is Orange County, California, where the cult often recruits on college campuses. Students warn that people calling themselves Christian invite you to take a survey or trivia quiz. “The leaders obviously know Scripture very well, and they’re very friendly,” an anonymous person posted on Reddit.

Zion Korean Church in Bellflower, California, is one of the largest SCJ churches in America. “Zion” is one of the names the cult uses in this country, as well as New Song and Light Ministries.

When Lee visits the United States, his talks are billed as peace-related. “Internationally acclaimed religious leader brings anti-war movement to L.A.,” proclaimed one newspaper about Lee’s 2013 stop at USC.

Lee’s 2012 speech at the Crystal Cathedral angered many members of the Garden Grove, California, church. A spokesman later said the cathedral would be more careful when renting out its space in the future.

Kent Annan: What You Should Know About Refugees and Immigrants

Jason Daye

January 23, 2019

Kent Annan is director of humanitarian and disaster leadership at Wheaton College’s Humanitarian Disaster Institute and cofounder of Haiti Partners, a nonprofit focused on education in Haiti. He also serves on the board of directors of the Equitas Group, a philanthropic foundation focused on ending child exploitation in Haiti and Southeast Asia. Kent received his MDiv from Princeton Theological Seminary. He has written a handful of books, including You Welcomed Me. He speaks regularly around the country and lives in Florida with his wife and two children.

Key Questions for Kent Annan

– What are the common fears you observe in the United States concerning refugees and immigrants?
– What lessons can we learn from other countries that have received more refugees than we have?
– From your research, do refugees and immigrants help or hurt the nations that welcome them?
– What can the local church do to help the big picture of immigration?

Key Quotes from Kent Annan

“Our fear is being stoked about the foreigner.”

“The Refugee Act was passed in 1980 and since 1980 there’s not been a single terrorist attack by a refugee that resulted in American life lost.”

“Neighborhoods where there’s a large immigrant population actually have less crime statistically throughout the country than neighborhoods that don’t have any immigrant in them.”

“I think security can become a kind of idol.”

“If we build up walls and protections around us to keep the stranger out, then I think, according to what Jesus says, we’re keeping Jesus out [Matthew 25].”

“When we welcome refugees, when we use a system that’s been put in place by our government, it actually has a really positive impact on our own government. So, for instance, on a national scale in the past decade, refugees brought in 63 billion dollars more in government revenues than they cost.”

“It is not an easy path [for refugees and immigrants]. It’s a path that, for the most part, they feel forced into for the sake of their families and for the sake of trying to make a future for their children.”

“Someone who’s paying a price, willing to work hard, and then making our communities better and helping out their own families–those are the kind of people I want as neighbors, and I’m excited to see when they have a chance to thrive.”

“I’d rather be a little too generous and say ‘oh we need to pull back, that’s too much and our country can’t handle that so we need to pull back and find the right balance” vs. saying ‘let’s not have anyone come in because there might, somewhere in the future be a danger in some way.’”

“I think one of the problems we’re seeing…is people other than the church are discipling normal people’s day-to-day view of immigrants and refugees. And we don’t want that discipleship to be turned over to news, on either side of the aisle.”

“This is a discipleship issue.”

“[When we welcome refugees] We’re not just entering into a political discussion. I think we’re giving people a beautiful vision of life.”

Mentioned in the Show:

You Welcomed Me: Loving Refugees and Immigrants Because God First Loved Us

Welcoming the Stranger by Matt Soerens and Jenny Yang

YouWelcomedMe.org [Family Toolkit and Church Curriculum]

Parents: Do These Blinders Prevent You From Protecting Your Child?

Jen Oshman

January 22, 2019

You know by now that Larry Nasser, the former Team USA gymnastics doctor who molested at least 160 girls, has been sentenced to life in prison. Last week he was confronted by many of his victims in court. A 40-minute address by Rachael Denhollander, who was abused 16 years ago, was especially powerful as she shared the weight of both God’s truth and grace with her abuser.

This avalanche season of abuse allegations and confirmations is a good time for us parents to revisit how we’re doing in terms of keeping our kids safe. I know this topic can be tiresome, but here are three areas where I think we parents are prone to putting our kids at risk unintentionally. In other words, I think we can accidentally wear blinders, which put our children in harm’s way.

Three Blinders Parents May Unknowingly Wear

1. Trusting in Titles

A person’s title does not automatically qualify him or her to be entrusted with our children. We’ve seen coaches, doctors, teachers, pastors, well-loved actors, respected journalists and others found guilty in recent months of abusing children and women. We parents must not assume that because someone has a degree, or years of experience with kids, or is well-respected in the community, that they are not a potential danger to our little ones. Titles do not equal trustworthy.

2. Our Children’s Potential Success

When we moved back from overseas two years ago a new neighbor said to me, “Everyone here treats their kids like they’re the next NBA star.” That may be overstating it a bit, but his point was that we live in an age when it is commonplace and even considered good parenting to provide our children with every opportunity to succeed in any sport or activity. As a result, families commit immense time, money and resources to training their young ones to be exceptional in a given area. This drive can result in parents being singularly focused. We are prone to thinking, “I have to send my daughter to that camp/practice/trainer’s clinic because she is so close to achieving the next level.” Our passion for their success can blind us to potential pitfalls.

3. Peer Pressure

As my neighbor alluded to, in our current cultural setting parents are committed to providing the best opportunities for their children. In our active suburban setting it is understood that good parents put their children in several sports from a young age. It is normal for kids to be on multiple teams at once, even a travel team, and be away from home most nights of the week. The cultural tide can easily sweep parents away as they sense that this is what good parents do. In wanting to provide the best, or in wanting to keep up with the Joneses, or in wanting to simply behave normally, it’s easy for parents to go with the flow and not even consider their child’s safety. Just because everyone’s doing it, doesn’t mean it’s wise.

Let’s Not Exchange One Idol for Another

Our drive to see our kids succeed can lead to us wearing the above blinders. As we potentially idolize our kids’ achievements, we can accidentally—but easily—forsake their innocence for their success. But let’s not trade in a singular focus on their success for a singular focus on their safety.

The abuse stories are heartbreaking and haunting. It’s our reflex to ask, “What do I need to do to make sure that doesn’t happen to my kid?” Helicopter parents abound in the name of safety. But safety is also an unworthy god. Like success, it is never satisfied and we will never be able to do enough to make sure that either goal is fully realized.

At the end of the day, my encouragement to you and to me is to:

Pray for wisdom
Equip our children with tools to identify a bad situation and to seek help
Be willing to make counter-cultural decisions for each child, according to the wisdom that God gives
Trust God’s sovereignty and goodness at all times
Know that you’ve done all that you can and that God is indeed enough for you and for your child if something ever does happen to them—know that he will bring healing

The State of Apatheism

James Emery White

January 22, 2019

In the first ever “State of Theology” survey conducted in the U.K., adults were asked what they believed about God, Jesus Christ and more. The headline? A third of all surveyed responded “I don’t know” to many of the questions.

For example, to the statement “There is one true God in three persons: God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit,” 29 percent agreed, 39 percent disagreed and 32 percent replied “don’t know.”

Or consider this: “Biblical accounts of the physical (bodily) resurrection of Jesus are completely accurate. This event actually occurred.” Only 20 percent agreed, 46 percent disagreed and, again, 34 percent didn’t know.

Even more, 36 percent didn’t know whether to agree or disagree with the statement “God counts a person as righteous not because of one’s own works, but only because of one’s faith in Jesus Christ.”

In fact, an article on the study concluded that “‘I don’t know’ was the top response to numerous questions about Jesus, sin, the Bible, salvation and other rudimentary theological concepts.”

“It’s actually tragic when you look at the survey and you see so many saying ‘I don’t know,’” Stephen Nichols, chief academic officer of Ligonier Ministries and president of Reformation Bible College, told Premier Christian Radio. “These aren’t just matters of life and death; these are matters of eternal life and eternal death. There can’t be any more consequential questions than the questions on this survey and so these ‘I don’t knows’ are really troubling.”

Yes, they are.

There are several responses that could be made to the seeming shrug of the shoulders toward theology. The most hopeful is, “Well, if they don’t know, let’s go tell them!” Yes, that would be the place to start. But it might be helpful to realize that there is more than mere ignorance at play. What if their “I don’t know” actually betrays a lack of interest, and not simply a lack of certainty? My sense is this would be the more accurate assessment.

There was an article in the Atlantic Monthly in which the author was describing his spiritual condition. Someone asked him about his religion. He was about to say “Atheist” when it dawned on him that this wasn’t quite accurate.

“I used to call myself an atheist,” he ended up responding, “and I still don’t believe in God, but the larger truth is that it has been years since I really cared one way or another. I’m (and this was when it hit him) an…apatheist!”

He then went on to describe his state as a “disinclination to care all that much about one’s own religion, and an even stronger disinclination to care about other people’s.”

But it’s what he wrote next that haunted me.

“I have Christian friends who organize their lives around an intense and personal relationship with God, but who betray no sign of caring that I am an unrepentantly atheistic Jewish homosexual. They are exponents, at least, of the second, more important part of apatheism: the part that doesn’t mind what other people think about God.”

And sadly, this seems an accurate reflection of our day. In a U.S. version of the same “State of Theology” study, to the statement, “It is very important for me personally to encourage non-Christians to trust Jesus Christ as their Savior,” a mere 38 percent of American evangelicals strongly agreed.

So while there was widespread lament to the “I don’t know” headline of the survey, the greater lament should surround the greater headline, true of believers and non-believers alike:

“I don’t care.”

Sources

“The State of Theology,” TheStateofTheology.com, read online.

Griffin Paul Jackson, “Brits’ Top Response to Theology Questions? ‘Don’t Know.’” Christianity Today, November 23, 2018, re ad online.

Jonathan Rauch, “Let It Be,” The Atlantic Monthly, May 2003 Issue, rea d online.

This article originally appeared here.

Death by Church Meetings: Five Considerations

Thom Rainer

January 22, 2019

He calls it “the most painful problem in business.”

Patrick Lencioni, in his book Death by Meeting, looks at one of the greatest resource wastes in businesses: too much time in meetings.

I have worked with churches for over 30 years. It’s even more painfully true in congregations.

Here is one real example. I worked with a church of 250 in attendance that had a monthly business meeting that lasted at least two hours; weekly deacon meetings that lasted at least two hours; and 13 committee meetings that met at least one hour each month (yes, you read that right—13 committee meetings).

The business meeting averaged about 75 in attendance. The deacon meetings had 11 in attendance, including staff. Each committee had an average of five in attendance.

Oh, I almost forgot. The ministry staff of four met two hours each week for a staff meeting.

Do the math. The total person hours in meetings each month for the church was 335 hours. The total person hours in meetings in a year was 4,020 hours.

Wouldn’t you love to have over 4,000 hours in Great Commission activity each year?

Death by Church Meetings: Five Considerations

Many of our churches are dying to death due to meetings. While I would not recommend the total eradication of meetings, I do recommend churches conduct a meeting audit. Most churches are in meetings as much as five to 10 times more than they need to be.

So, what can we do in our churches to reduce the time in meetings? What can we do to get more time in ministry from our members? Here are five considerations.

If you have a monthly business meeting, stop it! Consider a quarterly, semi-annual or even an annual meeting. You can keep the congregation informed on such matters as finances and ministries through digital newsletters. And you can always call a special meeting if you need one.
Change most of your committees to task forces. Once the task force completes its work, it ceases to exist. One of the greatest miracles in our churches today is the multiplication of committees. By the way, you don’t need a flower committee; you just need someone to take care of the flowers, real or dusty plastic.
Change your longer weekly staff meeting to a 15- to 20-minute stand-up staff meeting. You don’t need a two- to three-hour staff meeting every week. Limit the longer meetings to monthly meetings.
Communicate with modern technology. Not every meeting needs to take place. Much of that time can be replaced with emails, texts and communication through software like Slack and Asana.
If you must have a meeting, have a clear agenda with a specific time. I am a part of a homeowners’ association that will not cover any items unless they are placed on the agenda. The chairperson sets a time limit for each item with a visible stopwatch. Maybe such rigor is not for churches, but congregations can still follow basic committee time management principles.

How many person hours does your church meet every year? You might be surprised if you did an honest audit. And you might understand more fully why your members don’t have time to do real ministry.

This article originally appeared here.

Here are 11 ways to know if you have a mediocre marriage or are on your way to one:

1. Your marriage and life revolve around your kids.

2. It’s been over a year since you read a book on marriage.

3. Roles in marriage feel like a trap instead of freedom.

4. You can’t remember the last date night you had.

5. You have sex less than two times a week.

6. You nit pick at your spouse.

7. You consistently talk about how much you love your spouse on Facebook.

8. When you are alone with your spouse, you have nothing to talk about.

9. There are things in your past your spouse does not know.

10. You fantasize about being married to someone else.

11. A friend knows more about your marriage than your spouse does.

Worship Preferences: When Musical Taste Is A Precondition for Worship

Are You Enabling Mindless Worship?

7 Common Group Frustrations

Here are seven ways we frustrate other team members:

Harvest Bible Chapel Lawsuit, Relational Conflicts, Naples Conflict Addressed

Growing Success and Giving Back

It’s “A Hit”

Here are 7 things every leader needs to quit:

When Busy Becomes Too Busy: The Essential Business of Staying Connected to Your Heart

7 Churches That Are Often Tough to Pastor

How to Motivate Your Small Group Members

Getting to a High Motivation

What Is Needed to Thrive?

Autonomy

Relatedness

What Is Different?

The Law’s Impact

The Background and Beliefs of SCJ

SCJ’s Presence in the United States

Key Questions for Kent Annan

Key Quotes from Kent Annan

Mentioned in the Show:

Three Blinders Parents May Unknowingly Wear

Let’s Not Exchange One Idol for Another

Death by Church Meetings: Five Considerations

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