Canadian Church Hosts Assisted Suicide Service for Member

April 18, 2022

Churchill Park United Church is a progressive, affirming Canadian church located in Winnipeg, Manitoba, whose leadership says “is a church that makes you feel at home.” So much at home that it even provides its sanctuary as a place members can feel welcome to bring their lives to an end. On March 9, 2022, 86-year-old Betty Sanguin did just that in an assisted suicide ceremony.

Last spring, Sanguin was diagnosed with Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis (ALS), or better known as Lou Gehrig’s disease, named for the famous baseball player who was diagnosed with it. According to the Mayo Clinic, ALS “is a progressive nervous system disease that affects nerve cells in the brain and spinal cord, causing loss of muscle control.” The disease currently has no cure.

Sanguin’s daughter, Renée, said Sanguin’s health rapidly declined and “within a very short period of time, (the doctors) were talking about a feeding tube, because she couldn’t eat and swallow anymore.”

“My mom saw other people that were further along in their (ALS) diagnosis and all she knew is that she didn’t want that. That’s what my mom struggled with the most,” Sanguin’s other daughter, Lynda, shared.

“As the sun streamed through the stained glass windows in the music-filled sanctuary,” Sanguin’s obituary reads, the mother and grandmother was surrounded by her children, grandchildren, and close friends during her planned death.

The assisted suicide, which is legal in Canada, was called a “simple Crossing Over Ceremony” where Sanguin was able to “let go of her hold on this life.”

Sanguin visited with her family and friends during the ceremony hosted at the church. The lethal injection started at 1PM. An hour later, she was no longer present on earth. At 4PM, the funeral home arrived to take her body.

Sanguin was described as someone with a servant’s heart and an inspiration to others. Her ALS diagnosis came as shock to her family, and after the passing of her husband, she began to rapidly decline. Sanguin leaves behind six children, twelve grandchildren, and eleven great-grandchildren.

In May 2017, Churchill Park United Church’s denomination passed a resolution that allows for a “case-by-case approach to medical assistance in dying.”

“We are not opposed in principle to the legislation allowing assistance in dying and to such assistance being the informed, free choice of terminally ill patients,” The resolution reads. “There are occasions where unrelenting suffering and what we know about the effect of pain on the human body can make Medical Assistance in Dying a preferable option. However, we urge a cautious approach by legislators and medical professionals implementing these laws, as well as by individuals, families and communities of faith who are considering making use of this new legislative option. To this end, we advocate community-focused and theologically robust discernment on a case-by-case basis that also ensures the protection and care of those potentially made vulnerable by this new law and others like it.”

Daffodils Amid Destruction: Pastor Who Lost House in Colo. Fire Shares Easter Hope

Stephanie Martin

April 18, 2022

bill stephens — Pastor Bill Stephens gives the message on Easter Sunday, April 17. Screenshot from Facebook / @ascentcommunity

When the Marshall Fire destroyed more than 1,000 homes in Boulder County, Colo., last December, 26 of those belonged to families who attend Louisville’s Ascent Community Church. That includes the home of Lead Pastor Bill Stephens, who’s spent the past few months coming to terms with the losses.

As the congregation gathered for worship yesterday, Stephens said Easter provides the hope and the victory “that a lot of us need” right now. He also used striking visuals from the fire to show how Easter represents new life amid a backdrop of earthly pain.

Bill Stephens: Easter Means Death Won’t Win

When wind-whipped flames swept through 6,000+ acres on December 30, 2021, the Stephens family was out of state and unable to save any possessions. (On Facebook afterward, the pastor wrote, “As it turns out, if you buy a fire safe a couple months before a fire, you should actually put things in it.”)

For the past few months, Bill Stephens and other families in the church and community who lost everything have tried to pick up the pieces. Being “buried” beneath debris and insurance claims has felt overwhelming, the pastor admitted. “If there was ever a year that I have needed life out of death and hope out of being buried, it’s this year,” he said.

During his sermon, Stephens showed an image of daffodils springing up amid the burned remnants of his house. Like those flowers, the Easter message represents hope, rebirth, and new life, he said, even though destruction is still visible in the background. “Death is not gonna win,” he said. “That is Easter.”

Stephens also rolled out a wheelbarrow of debris he’d recently collected from his property. Included were remnants of his family’s 12-foot Christmas tree, which once held about 250 treasured ornaments. Seeing all that loss and sadness in the backdrop of hope is painful, the pastor said, just as Jesus endured the cross and the weight of the world’s sins. But because God so loved the world, we have victory and new life through our Savior—even when day-to-day life “isn’t all daffodils.”

Bill Stephen: God Grants Joy ‘In the Heart of Pain’

Stephens decided that Easter would mark a much-needed turning point in his disaster-recovery process. He had been frequently revisiting the loss—both mentally and physically—but “the other day, I just finally said, ‘You know what Bill? Enough.’”

‘God Gives Us Access to a Greater Story’: Hillsong Atlanta Relaunches As Story Church

Dale Chamberlain

April 18, 2022

Story Church Hillsong Atlanta Sam Collier — Screengrabs from Facebook.

On Easter Sunday (April 17), Story Church in Atlanta, Ga., held its first service. The church has taken the place of Hillsong Atlanta after that congregation disbanded in the wake of the resignation of its lead pastor, Sam Collier. Collier cited scandals within the Hillsong global church as the reason for his departure.

Collier, who had been Hillsong Church’s first African American pastor to lead a congregation, announced on March 27 that Hillsong Atlanta would dissolve. The announcement came less than a week after the resignation not only of Collier, but also Hillsong Church’s global senior pastor Brian Houston. Houston resigned the church he planted nearly four decades ago after it was revealed that he had acted inappropriately toward two women in separate incidents.

During the announcement regarding Hillsong Atlanta’s dissolution, Collier announced the launch of Story Church, which has retained much of Hillsong Atlanta’s leadership team with Collier as the lead pastor.

The launch of Story Church in place of Hillsong Atlanta came with the blessing of Hillsong Church’s leadership, as interim global senior pastor Phil Dooley expressed his hope that Story Church would flourish via video message to Hillsong Atlanta on its final Sunday gathering.

“We want to be a Spirit-filled environment,” Collier said as he invited Story Church into a time of worship through music on Sunday. “Which just simply means this: we believe that God is still alive, and He’s still moving throughout our midst.”

“We are praying for revival in this city and in this nation: an outpouring of God’s Spirit on every person. That every person that walks the earth that doesn’t know Christ would experience him in a transcendent moment,” Collier went on to say. “And in that moment, past all of the confusion and past all of the doubts and past all of the worries, the revelation of who God is would push through. That it would cut through and all would know that God is real. That Jesus is real. That we have access to Him that gives us the ability to overcome.”

Later in the service, Collier brought some members of the Story Church staff onto the stage to introduce them. He also invited those in attendance to a “family meeting” that will take place next week. During that meeting, Collier said that all the staff and board members will be introduced and congregants will be able to ask questions about the church.

“One of the things I want to point out is you’ll notice that we have women in leadership here,” Collier said as the church cheered and applauded. “Which, at some churches, is not a thing. But it will be true here. Women will find freedom and be empowered in this church.”

“Obviously, the men will as well,” Collier added, “but that really hasn’t been the issue, has it?” After some laughter from the congregation, Collier went on to reiterate that diversity is a core pillar for Story Church and that he hopes the church will be a place that “uplifts both women and men.”

Grand Rapids Pastors Mobilize in Wake of Fatal Shooting of Patrick Lyoya

Kathryn Post

April 18, 2022

(RNS) — Pastors in Grand Rapids, Michigan, are taking action as the city reels in the aftermath of the fatal shooting of 26-year-old Patrick Lyoya by a Grand Rapids police officer on April 4. Video footage of the shooting was released on Wednesday (April 13), sparking protests outside the city’s police department.

Lyoya, who is Black, was pulled over last week for a mismatched license plate. Video footage shows a white officer shooting Lyoya in the head after a brief scuffle. Lyoya and his family arrived from the Democratic Republic of the Congo in 2014 as refugees, and he leaves behind his parents, two young daughters and five siblings.

In the days since Lyoya’s death, a group of Black pastors in Grand Rapids, called the Black Clergy Coalition, has been organizing community events to promote dialogue, healing and justice.

“We think that our faith perspective is critical in this hour, to not just discuss policy change, which is necessary, but to also discuss the spiritual and faith dynamic,” said Pastor Jathan K. Austin of Bethel Empowerment Church in Grand Rapids. “We must continue to keep our trust in the Father so that people don’t lose trust in this time because of the heartache, the pain.”

On Sunday (April 10), the group helped organize a forum for community discussion in response to Lyoya’s death. The discussion took place at Renaissance Church of God in Christ in Grand Rapids — the location was intentional, according to the church’s senior pastor, Bishop Dennis J. McMurray, who noted the wider church’s historic role in guiding civil rights movements and said the Black Clergy Coalition is drawing on that legacy.

“It was unreal, the level of cooperative dialogue and understanding that took place,” McMurray told Religion News Service. “If these conversations would have started almost anywhere else, the volatility that could be associated to something as devastating as what we’re facing could have been a bomb that goes off that would cause so many other issues.”

The group also helped host a Thursday press conference at the Renaissance Church of God in Christ and a noon Good Friday service at the church, where they took up a collection for the Lyoya family.

The Rev. Khary Bridgewater, who lives in Grand Rapids, said the city’s racial and religious landscape informs how local leaders are responding to Lyoya’s death. Grand Rapids has a population that’s over 65% white and about 18% Black. It’s also the headquarters for the Christian Reformed Church, a small, historically Dutch Reformed denomination, and is home to over 40 CRC churches. According to Bridgewater, leaders shaped by the CRC’s reformed theology are often more likely to advocate for change within existing systems.

According to Bridgewater, “It’s very hard for most CRC churches to look at a system and say, ‘This is wrong, we’re going to act as activists to push the system into a different state.’ They’re more inclined to say, ‘Hey, let’s sit down and have a conversation with the leaders and try to do things differently.’” Bridgewater says this theology can bump up against the Black church’s prophetic tradition of change-making. For this reason, he said, Christian groups in Grand Rapids need to have theological discussions around topics like justice and citizenship.

Nik Smith, a Grand Rapids activist and member of Defund the GRPD, agrees the city’s religious culture is shaping local leaders’ responses.

“The nonprofits are run by Christian folk who are just waiting for Jesus to come, not realizing not only was he here already, but he’s given us things to live by,” said Smith. “So we have to be seeking justice actively in our community. We can’t just say, let’s pray. Prayer is not going to bring Patrick back.”

For Many, Easter Sunday Marks a Return to in-Person Worship

Steve LeBlanc, Giovanna Dell'Orto and Deepa Bharath

April 18, 2022

in-person worship — The faithful packed St. Peter Claver church in St. Paul, Minn., for the first indoor, in-person Easter Sunday service since the pandemic hit, on Sunday, April 17, 2022. The Catholic Archdiocese of Saint Paul and Minneapolis rescinded all pandemic restrictions on April 1, while encouraging parishes and congregants to follow their own pace in loosening COVID-19 protocols. (AP Photo/Giovanna Dell'Orto)

BOSTON (AP) — For many U.S. Christians, this weekend marked the first time since 2019 that they gathered in person on Easter Sunday, a welcome chance to celebrate one of the year’s holiest days side by side with fellow congregants.

Notable events included a 6 a.m. sunrise Mass outdoors near the waterfront in South Boston, and a joyous, hug-filled service at St. Peter Claver, a historically Black congregation in St. Paul, Minnesota.

Another mostly Black congregation, Watson Grove Baptist Church in Nashville, Tennessee, had hoped for an outdoors service at a downtown park. But rain forced a last-minute change of plans, and about 700 mask-wearing worshippers met instead in the church’s sanctuary for what senior pastor John Faison said was by far their biggest indoor gathering during the pandemic.

“We hadn’t seen a crowd like this for two years,” Faison said. “Eyes were lighting up. People just felt good.”

The pandemic erupted in the country in March 2020, just ahead of Easter, forcing many churches to resort to online or televised worship. Many continued to hold virtual services last spring after a deadly winter wave of the coronavirus and as vaccination campaigns were still ramping up. But this year more churches opened their doors for Easter services with few COVID-19 restrictions, in line with broader societal trends.

Among them were Catholic parishes in the Archdiocese of Boston, which since last June has once again required most churchgoers to attend Mass in person — though those with health risks may still watch remotely, and pastors have been asked to make space for social distancing in churches.

MC Sullivan, chief health care ethicist for the archdiocese, said celebrating Mass communally is important to how Catholics profess their faith. Church attendance has been trending upward, and parishioners are excited to gather again to commemorate Christ’s resurrection.

“It has been quite wonderful to see how well-attended Mass is right now. … It seems to have brought a lot of people back to the idea of what’s important to them,” she said.

At St. Peter Claver in St. Paul, there was whooping, applause and exultant pounding on the wooden pews when the Rev. Joseph Gifford told more than 200 faithful that the church’s usual sign of the peace was back – no more pandemic-era nodding or mild handshakes.

“The place just explodes,” said longtime parishioner Lynette Graham. “When he said we could do it, people were all over the church,” hugging each other.

Another highlight of the service: the first performance by its Cameroonian choir – with its spirited drumming and West African melodies – since the pandemic hit.

“We’re back and He’s risen and it’s huge,” choir director Brendan Banteh said. “The ministry in our culture is very celebratory, being one in church – the choir, the priest, the people. Not being able to come to church had created a disconnect that we had never experienced before.”

Pope Makes Easter Plea for Ukraine Peace, Cites Nuclear Risk

Frances D'Emilio

April 18, 2022

VATICAN CITY (AP) — On what is supposed to be Christianity’s most joyful day, Pope Francis made an anguished Easter Sunday plea for peace in the “senseless” war in Ukraine and in other armed conflicts raging in the world, and voiced worry about the risk of nuclear warfare.

“May there be peace for war-torn Ukraine, so sorely tried by the violence and destruction of this cruel and senseless war into which it was dragged,” Francis said, speaking from the central balcony of St. Peter’s Square.

The pontiff had just finished celebrating Easter Mass in the square packed by faithful for the holiday for the first time since the pandemic began in early 2020. Applause erupted from many of the crowd, estimated by the Vatican to number 100,000 in the square and on a nearby avenue, when he mentioned Ukraine.

“Please, please, let us not get used to war,” Francis pleaded, after denouncing ”the flexing of muscles while people are suffering.” Yet again, the pontiff didn’t cite Russian President Vladimir Putin for the decision to launch the invasion and attacks against Ukraine on Feb. 24.

People’s hearts are filled with “fear and anguish, as so many of our brothers and sisters have had to lock themselves away in order to be safe from bombing,” the pontiff said.

“Let us all commit ourselves to imploring peace, from our balconies and in our streets,” Francis said. ”May the leaders of nations hear people’s plea for peace.”

In a clear reference to the threat of nuclear warfare, Francis quoted from a noted declaration of 1955: “’Shall we put an end to the human race, or shall mankind renounce war?'”

He was quoting from a manifesto written by philosopher Bertrand Russell and physicist Albert Einstein. The manifesto’s text, sounding a grim warning against the consequences of nuclear warfare, was issued a few months after Einstein died.

Meanwhile, in Britain, the leader of the Anglican church, Archbishop of Canterbury Justin Welby, called for Russia to declare a cease-fire and withdraw from Ukraine.

Noting that in the Eastern Orthodox church followed by many in Russia and Ukraine Sunday marks the start of Holy Week — with Easter coming on April 24 — Welby exhorted Russia to withdraw from Ukraine and commit to talks.

Francis also drew attention to other wars in the speech known by its Latin name “Urbi et Orbi” — to the city and to the world.

“May the conflict in Europe also make us more concerned about other situations of conflict, suffering and sorrow, situations that affect all too many areas of our world, situations that we cannot overlook and do not want to forget,” Francis said.

Two days after Palestinians and Israeli police clashed in Jerusalem, Francis prayed that “Israelis, Palestinians and all the inhabitants of the Holy City, together with pilgrims, experience the beauty of peace, of living in brotherhood and of accessing Holy Places” in reciprocal respect.

He called for peace and reconciliation for the peoples of Lebanon, Syria, Iraq and Libya.

Francis spoke plaintively about Yemen, “which suffers from a conflict forgotten by all, with continuous victims.” He expressed hope that a recent truce would restore hope to that country’s people.

Virtual Bathtub Baptisms Help Maryland Megachurch Gain Online Members During Pandemic

Adelle M Banks

April 18, 2022

baptisms — The Rev. Maurice Winn, left, congratulates Amina Massai Jefferson-Motley, right, and her mother, Brandi Jefferson, following Amina's virtual baptism in February 2021. Video screen grab courtesy of RNS

(RNS) — In February 2021, Amina Massai Jefferson-Motley dressed in a white shirt and pants for her baptism.

Her mother stood nearby as an associate minister of First Baptist Church of Glenarden asked the little girl about her Christian beliefs.

But the officiant of the Maryland megachurch was states away. Amina was in the bathtub of her Georgia home, becoming the first online campus member of the Maryland megachurch to be baptized virtually.

“I’ve been wanting to get baptized for years now and I finally got to do it,” said the now 11-year-old in an interview during Holy Week, when Christians say their baptism symbolizes their belief in Jesus’ crucifixion, death and resurrection.

“After I got baptized, I just felt so grateful that I was saved, and the Holy Spirit was with me.”

Brandi Jefferson, who assisted her daughter’s immersion in the bathtub, said the virtual baptism was an answer to her prayers. The mother and daughter had been watching the congregation’s services online after they moved away from Maryland. But Jefferson didn’t know how to fulfill her daughter’s request for baptism when they were physically distant from her church of almost 20 years.

Fourteen months after the fifth-grader took part in the ritual, the church has held 91 virtual baptisms. It is planning to start in-person baptisms on Tuesday, but the bathtub variety will still be offered to online campus congregants.

“We’re getting people baptized and being obedient to Christ all over the world,” said Pastor John K. Jenkins Sr., the leader of the predominantly Black church in the suburbs of Washington, D.C.

“This pandemic has pushed me to understand that there are things that I never thought we could do that we can do.”

The megachurch is not the first to expand the tradition from the sanctuary to the screen — requiring for each ceremony for a baptismal candidate someone to assist with the baptizing, and someone to hold the camera as the online officiant declares the public act of faith “in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit.”

There are online videos of such ceremonies dating to the 2000s, including one in a Georgia bathtub where the officiant was in Florida. Another was in a swimming pool in Alabama when the local pastor was away at a conference in Indiana. John Dyer cited these instances in his blog about technology and theology in 2020, adding that the woman who requested the pool baptism had been ill and died four days after the ceremony.

Dyer, a vice president at Dallas Theological Seminary, wrote that a church’s decision to engage in virtual baptism “may depend on how your community understands the meaning of baptism.” For those who make that choice, he recommended using “physical water,” including the declaration “I baptize you in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit,” and being baptized by another Christian.

The Rev. Keshia Dixon, online campus minister at First Baptist Glenarden — which recently added “International” to the end of its name — said her church has determined that the baptism assistant does not have to share the faith of the baptized.

“The power is in the profession of faith that you’re making and the power is in the work of the Holy Spirit in that moment,” she said. “So it doesn’t matter who helps you go under the water. It’s what it symbolizes. And it’s the presence of the Holy Spirit that’s important in that moment.”

Dixon notes in an instructional video she created for baptismal candidates that there are options if a bathtub is too small or not available. She suggested a jacuzzi — “but make sure the water isn’t too hot” — a swimming pool or a public body of water. Alternatively, the assistant can pour a warm pitcher of water over the head of a baptismal candidate sitting on a chair in a tub or shower stall.

Alicia Cameron, the first international online campus member to be baptized, started watching the church’s services early in 2021.

The beaches in her location in Arima, Trinidad — where ocean baptisms are traditionally common — were closed to the public due to the COVID-19 pandemic, and she didn’t have a bathtub. So, after the “blown away moment” when she learned virtual baptism was possible through First Baptist Glenarden, she also discovered she could use her shower for the ritual.

“This is really working out for me,” she recalled thinking ahead of her Aug. 28 baptism. “God is just opening pathway after pathway to make this possible

Now, Easter has new meaning for Cameron, 45, a senior manager at an educational institution who used to consider Christmas the more prominent holiday.

“This time around, for me, Easter takes on a new significance now that I’m reevaluating what Christ really did around this time and what that meant for me as a child of God,” she said.

“I’m going to use it to be very introspective, very reflective of the true meaning of what Easter is all about.”

This article originally appeared here.

A Christian Response to ‘Don’t Say Gay’

James Emery White

April 18, 2022

Gov. Ron DeSantis of Florida recently signed legislation that prohibits classroom instruction and discussion about sexual orientation and gender identity in elementary schools, specifically kindergarten-third grade.

The cultural divide can be seen in how the bill is referenced. While the law is officially titled “Parental Rights in Education,” it has drawn national criticism from LGBTQ groups who refer to is as the “Don’t Say Gay” law.

When signing the bill, DeSantis made his convictions clear: “We will make sure that parents can send their kids to school to get an education, not an indoctrination.”

Opponents fear a chilling effect among teachers and young students, coupled with a concern that the law censors and excludes a community of people from public schools. Reaction from critics has been swift: because the company’s chief executive did not take a stronger stand against the legislation, LGBTQ workers and their sympathizers at Disney staged walkouts in protest. During the Oscars, hosts Amy Schumer, Regina Hall and Wanda Sykes chanted “gay, gay, gay.” President Biden called the legislation “hateful.”

Sentiment against the legislation seems to rest on the rejection of any situation or context where there isn’t the freedom to introduce, discuss and teach on issues related to sexual orientation and gender identity—even to very young children independent of a parent’s consent. Somehow, if not allowed, that is a blow to the legitimation of the LGBTQ community.

But why, precisely, would sexual orientation or gender identity need to be discussed or taught in a kindergarten class to protect the LGBTQ community? There is no reason, and none have been offered. Nor is there is a reason, nor one being offered, as to why a teacher needs to be set free to engage potential conversations – if asked – by a kindergartner on such matters. For children of that age, that is for the parent to engage.

And if a child asks an unprompted question on the matter, again, any discussions at such a young age should be between a child and their parent, not a child and their teacher. And to the “chilling” effect this has on the classroom? I’m not feeling the temperature drop. In the 0.00001% chance a child does ask a teacher an unprovoked question related to such advanced topics, the teacher can simply say, “That is a very good question, and it’s one you should ask your parents about when you get home. Now let’s get back to our ABCs.”

Whether you think the legislation was needed or not – meaning political grandstanding or authentic concern – the legislation itself simply says, again, that sexual orientation and gender identity issues have no place in kindergarten-third grade. And it’s true. They don’t.

To be enraged that such common-sensical thinking be put in writing is non-sensical.

The only other argument against the legislation that is suggested is that it harms children who may not have anywhere else to turn. But that is precisely the point of the legislation. It is not the role of a public-school teacher to become the parent of a child. To say that a child would have “nowhere else to turn” insinuates that if a child wants to turn away from a parent’s authority or influence, they should be able to.

What Will It Be Like to Step Into Heaven and Come Face to Face With Jesus?

Randy Alcorn

April 18, 2022

Many of you have asked about Nanci’s memorial service. It will be held Sunday, May 15 at 3:30 p.m. at our home church, Good Shepherd Community Church, 28986 SE Haley Rd, Boring, OR 97009. A live stream will be available, and the video will also be available at that web address after the service.

Thanks so much for your continued prayers for our family. We would also appreciate your prayers that the service will be honoring to Nanci and above all honoring to her beloved Jesus.

Contemplating Heaven is where my heart is at right now. In this excerpt from my novel Deception, I picture one of the characters entering Heaven:

One moment Carly Woods was awake in a world of pain. The next moment she felt herself falling to sleep. A rush of sound and light awakened her.

At first she thought she was walking through a glowing passageway. Then she realized she was being carried, effortlessly, in mighty arms.

Behind her was a ruined paradise, a wasteland waiting to be reclaimed. Ahead of her was a world of substance and light, overflowing with color. The place beckoned her to come dive into it, to lose herself and find herself in something greater than she’d ever known. In one moment, Carly Woods had moved from midnight to sunrise.

“Awesome!” she said.

“Yes,” said a deep, resonant voice above her. She turned and looked up at the rock-chiseled face of a great creature, a shining warrior, looking like a man, yet different. She’d never seen anything like him. Yet somehow she thought she’d known him for years. She sensed he was rescuing her, that his job was to carry the wounded to where they’d be made well.

“I am Tor-el, servant of Elyon, God Most High. I have served Him by watching over you each day of your life in the Shadowlands.”

“I never knew.”

“Elyon knew,” he said, the edges of his lips turning barely upward. “That is all that matters.”

She turned to look where she was going. With every step the warrior took, she saw more color, detail, and activity. She could taste and smell life. The place reached out to her, pulling her in, as a magnet pulls iron filings.

“I’m getting stronger,” Carly said, recognizing her voice, but realizing it was much fuller. She’d never liked the sound of her voice. Now she did.

“I thought my life was over. It feels like it’s just begun.”

The voice above her spoke again. “The end is behind you, little one. This is the beginning that has no end.”

People crowded against a beautiful white fence, reaching their arms toward her. She heard their applause and an enchanting laughter. The warrior put her down.

She turned and said, “Thank you, Tor-el. For everything. I… I’d like to talk more.”

8 Spiritual Growth Questions to Ask Small Group Members

Peter Mannering

April 18, 2022

You love surveys most likely if you need the information and despise them if you have to fill it out.

As a small group leader or point person, you have a vested interest in spiritual growth. Some leaders tend to value metrics, and others desire more qualitative information like stories.

No matter where you find yourself, we want to know that individuals in small groups are pursuing spiritual growth as critical leaders.

Recently, I found myself in a leadership conversation about spiritual growth and surveys. Browncroft, the church I serve, utilizes Church Community Builder (CCB) as its Church Management Software (CMS). This platform provides us with crucial insights like small group attendance, serving, and giving.

Two problems emerge in our discussion about spiritual growth. First, prayer and Bible engagement metrics need more context (as with every spiritual growth area) than a checkbox. Secondly, surveys and reports can diminish the value of these discussions in small groups.

Small groups are the central location for conversations about spiritual growth. Leaders like yourself provide pastors and elders with far more insight into the spiritual temperature of the church.

Don’t get me wrong, I see tremendous value in CMS reporting and surveys, but small groups create a safe atmosphere to process spiritual next steps. If we all committed to normalizing these conversations, I wonder if we could help individuals grow spiritually through encouragement and accountability.

8 Spiritual Growth Questions to Ask Small Group Members

1. What are you reading in the Bible, and how is it challenging you to grow?

Often, we want to know how often people engage the Bible. A better starting place comes from individuals identifying how God’s Word influences their life. This question helps individuals articulate that, and then you can check on regularity. Also, it’s helpful to know if people find themselves in a desert season of engagement. Now, the small group can support and encourage someone in that season.

2. What have you been praying about, and how is God working your life through prayer?

The content of our prayers reveals our worries, fears, hopes, and dreams. Taking a moment to delve into our prayers’ content will help individuals see where God is working. Consider this – when was the last time someone asked you that question? Getting in the habit of spiritual growth questions challenges us to more in-depth conversations about what God is doing in our lives.

3. When did you get baptized? If you have not been baptized, what’s challenging for you to pursue it?

As a church leader, do you know if every person in your group has gotten baptized? Again, this question does not come as a checkbox but as a way to prompt spiritual growth. Often, I have found people have fears about baptism. I wonder how much of that would change if they knew their small group supported them publicly declaring their faith.

4. What are your spiritual gifts? How are you using the gifts God gave you to serve others?

Imagine what would happen at the church you serve if people knew and recognized their spiritual gifts. People sit on the sidelines because they fear failure or even wonder if they can make a difference. Even before offering a serve opportunity, you as a leader can help start the discussion with individuals on their spiritual gifts. That discussion could even lead to someone moving out of a serving role to a better position. That could also mean individuals serving more in the small group.

5. Who are you sharing your faith with and what’s the biggest challenge you face?

A key outgrowth of someone maturing in following Jesus becomes sharing their faith. Sometimes, we find ourselves embarrassed to share. These questions delve deep so that we can normalize our fear and anxiety. Regularly asking this question helps individuals strategically think about who God has placed in their life to experience the gospel.

6. How are you financially giving and investing in the church?

You probably have heard it said that Jesus talked about money more than any other topic. One of my friends Tom Melzoni often says, “Giving is something God wants for you, not from you.” In some ways, this question is less about giving and more about how individuals might need help with budgeting. Yes, it could become a messy conversation, but if we can’t talk about money in small groups, where can we? No matter where a person is on the continuum of giving, God challenges us to have faith and look for ways to invest in His kingdom. Our bank statement reflects our values.

7. When did you become a church member? If you have not pursued membership, what’s challenging you to pursue it?

Not all the churches represented in this network have membership. If you do, you will want to clarify the value with senior leadership. The membership discussion reflects a commitment to the church. This practice has changed generationally, but the more extensive discussion helps people see their essential participation in the Body of Christ.

8. What’s your spiritual next step?

None of us have arrived spiritually. Small groups that ask this question help individuals take risks and get outside their comfort zones. I wonder how many people find themselves second-guessing an opportunity because they have not felt the support of their small group. Let’s normalize this question and celebrate it.

We can become tempted to go on autopilot in our small groups. I believe these questions provide clarity and can spark spiritual growth in individuals. They also provide context more than data.

This article originally appeared on smallgroupnetwork.com

The Secret to Writing a Great Youth Ministry Talk

Aaron Helman

April 18, 2022

What’s the single biggest difference between the top speakers and the average ones?

The answer will surprise you.

It’s not wild creativity or better jokes or cool clothes and haircuts.

It’s not presentation skills or voice quality or rehearsed hand gestures.

So what is it? What’s the secret sauce that top speakers have that the rest of us don’t?

The secret to a great talk is in the editing, not the writing.

A top-notch director might shoot 45-80 hours of video to put out a 90-minute feature film.

What do we do before youth group?

We show up with 18 minutes of prepared material and try to stretch it into 20.

I’m not nearly optimistic enough to pretend like every idea I’ve ever had is good enough to see the light of day.

Are you?

Here’s the thing about those top speakers. It’s not that they always have only great ideas. It’s this:

Great speakers have plenty of bad ideas. They’re just good at squashing those ideas before they get used.

Sometimes this means resisting the temptation to share everything.

Other times it means cutting out your most hilarious story because it just doesn’t fit that well.

But in every case, it means preparing enough material that you can cut some of it and still have plenty of message left over at the end.

Prepare more than you need.

If you know you need to speak for 15 minutes, your first draft should run 20 minutes.

Don’t stop when you think you’re done, write more and then write some more. Add another illustration. If you’re a funny person, write a few more jokes. Find even more Bible verses that support your point.

If you found a great video, find another one.

Collect more good ideas than you can possibly use, and don’t worry, we’ll do something with all of those real soon.

Edit like a pro.

I always shoot to cut as much as a third of my message between first draft and final presentation. You can do that too, but first a word of warning.

Don’t try to draw a line between good and bad ideas. After all, there’s an excellent chance that all of your ideas are pretty good ideas.

Instead, you’re looking for best ideas and ideas that aren’t quite to that level. What do I do with all of those ideas?

Best ideas stay in the message.

Good ideas are cut from the message and filed away for another day.

Bad ideas are expunged without pity and I don’t like to talk about them.

Ruthless editing in practice.

If you want to become a better speaker, here’s how you can put this into practice by tomorrow.

1. Prepare 20 percent more material than you usually do.

2. Plan on speaking 20 percent less than you usually do.

So if you usually speak for 15 minutes, plan on writing 18 minutes of material and speaking for 12.

Yes, it’s extra work, but then you didn’t think you’d become a better speaker without extra work, did you?

If you’re down to become a ruthless editor and a better speaker, let me know about it.

5 Leadership Lessons From Will Smith’s Slap Heard Round the World

Brian Dodd

April 16, 2022

During the Oscars, Will Smith and Chris Rock were part of one of the most uncomfortable, disturbing, and talked-about moments ever witnessed on national television.

As is the tradition in these type of events, Rock was roasting many of the members in the audience. This happens annually at the Oscars, Golden Globes, ESPYs, Grammys, and for that matter, every late night talk show and Bill Maher. But Rock’s statement to Smith’s wife, Jada Pinkett-Smith, apparently crossed a line when he said, “‘G.I. Jane 2,’ can’t wait to see it.” The following video shows what ensued.

Will Smith initially laughed at the joke but then came on stage and slapped Rock in the face. For those who do not know, Smith’s wife suffers from alopecia, an auto-immune condition that causes hair loss. Afterwards, from his seat in the first row, he twice shouted, “Keep my wife’s name out of your [expletive] mouth.” The audience was stunned. Twitter exploded. As a result, this issue has been examined from every possible angle.

I will now give my thoughts.

5 Leadership Lessons From Will Smith’s Slap Heard Round The World

We Live In A Lawless Land

Will Smith should have been arrested. Period. Assault is generally defined as “intentionally putting another person in reasonable apprehension of an imminent harmful or offensive contact. Physical injury is not required.” I think Smith’s slap obviously was offensive contact and put Rock in a reasonable apprehension of harmful contact.

Notice the legal definition does not state anything about whether the act was justified or not.

I am still confused as to why Smith was allowed to return to his seat and less than an hour later win an award, get a standing ovation, and then say, “I’m being called on in my life to love people and to protect people. And to be a river to my people.” This action would indicate Smith’s river is polluted with hypocrisy and lawlessness.

Never Get Fun At Someone Else’s Expense

I am also confused at to what Smith was expecting. He was the presumptive winner of Best Actor for his portrayal of Richard Williams in King Richard. Smith was seated in the front row. Once again, comedians with a history of roasting people were employed to be the show’s hosts. Traditionally, “poking fun” at the stars is what happens at these events.

But we were reminded of a basic form of respect and human decency which is to never get fun at someone else’s expense. Dignity is the imprint of God on every human soul. “I was just kidding” is never an excuse for degrading comments. Degrading a person and hurting their dignity for the purposes of increasing our own self-worth or public standing is unadvisable and just plain wrong.

Maybe this will be the start of ending the “roasting” and degradation of people and the start of building others up.

Angry People Are Foolish People

The only difference between anger and danger is a “D”. Since Smith said in his acceptance speech, “I am overwhelmed by what God is calling on me to do and be in this world,” allow me to share with you what God says about angry people. I could have gone on for dozens and dozens verses more but will stop at 15.

Christian Witness to China Camp Horrors Now in U.S.

Tom Strode

April 15, 2022

WASHINGTON (BP) – A Christian who was imprisoned for 10 months in western China is now in the United States as a witness to the notorious “re-education” camps being operated by the Communist regime of the world’s most populous country.

Ovalbek Turdakun, his wife and son arrived in the United States April 8 after a lengthy, successful effort to avoid deportation back to China that was aided by allies in the United States and other countries. Ovalbek is the first Christian to speak out about his detention in the camps in Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Region, according to Axios, a news website that first reported on his arrival April 12.

The Chinese Communist Party (CCP) has primarily targeted the Uyghurs, a primarily Muslim group in Xinjiang, in a genocidal campaign, but other ethnic groups also have been included in its suppression. The CCP’s tactics have included widespread detention in “re-education” camps, forced labor and a coercive population control program of abortion and sterilization. The State Department under both Presidents Trump and Biden has determined China is guilty of genocide in Xinjiang.

Messengers to the Southern Baptist Convention’s 2021 meeting resoundingly adopted a resolution that condemned the CCP’s oppression of the Uyghurs and called for the U.S. government to take “concrete actions” to end the genocide. The SBC reportedly became the first Christian faith group to denounce China’s campaign against the Uyghurs as genocide.

In a Washington, D.C., news conference Wednesday (April 13), Ovalbek described a 10-month detention by the Chinese government that included torture and forced injections. He was under house arrest for another eight months after his release from the camp in December 2018. An ethnic Kyrgyz, Ovalbek and his family walked across the border into Kyrgyzstan in December 2019 and eventually received aid in reaching the United States.

“I thank God that He brought me and my family safely here,” Turdakun said at the news conference through an interpreter. “I thank the American government.” He also thanked two members of the audience who were instrumental in his family’s arrival in this country.

Chelsea Sobolik, director of public policy for the Southern Baptist Ethics & Religious Liberty Commission (ERLC), said, “The Chinese Communist Party has continued to wage a heinous, systematic war against Christians, Uyghurs, and other ethnic and religious minorities. Mr. Ovalbek, the first Christian detained who has been able to flee Xinjiang and come forward publicly about his experience, courageously shines a light on the genocide being committed by the CCP.

“Christians across the globe must continue to speak up in the face of this atrocity, and the ERLC will continue advocating for the religious freedom of all people in China,” she told Baptist Press in written comments.

Speakers at the news conference said they expect Ovalbek’s testimony will be invaluable in American and international efforts to hold the CCP accountable.

Rep. Chris Smith, R-N.J., told Ovalbek at the news conference, “We are inspired … by your courage, by your faith, by your commitment to human rights, and by your very powerful and very keen powers of observation.

“[Y]our information, your leadership is critical,” Smith told him. While the focus is now on Russia’s assault on Ukraine, “we can’t take our focus off what is happening every single day in the concentrations camps in Xinjiang.”

Rodney Dixon, a British lawyer specializing in international law, told the news conference audience Ovalbek “is going to be vital in providing more first-hand, inside information on what is happening in China and in neighboring countries.”

Dixon’s legal team has urged the International Criminal Court to investigate Tajikistan, which borders Xinjiang, about the disappearance of Uyghurs, apparently back to China. A report will be submitted soon requesting an investigation and prosecution of China, he said.

Abortion Ban After 15 Weeks Signed Into Law in Florida

Anthony Izaguirre

April 15, 2022

TALLAHASSEE, Fla. (AP) — Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis signed a 15-week abortion ban into law Thursday as the state joined a growing conservative push to restrict access to the procedure ahead of a U.S. Supreme Court decision that could roll back abortion rights in America.

“This will represent the most significant protections for life that have been enacted in this state in a generation,” DeSantis said as he signed the bill at an evangelical church in the city of Kissimmee.

Republicans nationwide have moved to place new restrictions on abortion after the U.S. Supreme Court signaled it would uphold a Mississippi law banning abortions after 15 weeks. The high court’s decision, expected this summer, could potentially weaken or overturn Roe v. Wade, the landmark 1973 decision that established a nationwide right to abortion.

The law DeSantis signed Thursday also deals a blow to overall abortion access in the South, where Florida has provided wider access to the procedure than its regional neighbors.

The new law, which takes effect July 1, contains exceptions if the abortion is necessary to save a mother’s life, prevent serious injury or if the fetus has a fatal abnormality. It does not allow for exemptions in cases where pregnancies were caused by rape, incest or human trafficking, despite several Democratic attempts to amend the bill. Under current law, Florida allows abortions up to 24 weeks.

Debate over the proposal grew deeply personal and revealing inside the legislature, as lawmakers recalled their own abortions and experiences with sexual assault in often tearful speeches on the House and Senate floors. Republicans have repeatedly called the 15-week ban reasonable.

A federal Centers for Disease Control and Prevention report said about 2% of the nearly 72,000 abortions reported in Florida in 2019 were performed after 15 weeks. That same year, 2,256 out-of-state residents got abortions in Florida, with the majority, or about 1,200 coming, from Georgia and more than 300 from Alabama, according to the CDC. The origin of the remaining patients was not clear.

Democrats were quick to criticize the new law after the signing.

“Politicians have no business getting between a patient and her doctor,” House Democratic Leader Evan Jenne said. “This 15-week abortion ban takes away every woman’s right to make personal decisions that should only be made by themselves, with their family, their doctor, and their faith.”

The legislation came a few months after the U.S. Supreme Court’s conservative majority indicated it would uphold Mississippi’s 15-week ban. There also has been substantial support among the conservative justices for getting rid of Roe altogether.

If Roe is overturned, 26 states are certain or likely to quickly ban or severely restrict abortion, according to the Guttmacher Institute, a think tank that supports abortion rights. During the debate over the Florida legislation, as well as at the bill’s signing ceremony, Republicans said they want the state to be well placed to limit access to abortions if the Supreme Court upholds Mississippi’s law.

“The reality of the Roe decision is that men on the Supreme Court proclaimed that women, in order to achieve equality with men, must be able to kill their own children,” said Republican Rep. Erin Grall, the bill’s sponsor. “As a woman, I refuse to accept such a perverse version of equality.”

Elsewhere in the U.S., Republican lawmakers have introduced new abortion restrictions, some similar to a Texas law that bans abortion after roughly six weeks and leaves enforcement up to private citizens.

Oklahoma Republican Gov. Kevin Stitt recently signed a bill to make it a felony to perform an abortion, punishable by up to a decade in prison. Arizona Republican Gov. Doug Ducey in March signed legislation to outlaw abortion after 15 weeks if the U.S. Supreme Court leaves Mississippi’s law in place.

___

AP writer Adriana Gomez Licon contributed from Miami.

This article originally appeared here.

Easter Holiday Bus Crash in Eastern Zimbabwe Takes 35 Lives

Farai Mutsaka

April 15, 2022

Bus Crash — Photo via Unsplash.com @Aaron Burden

MUTARE, Zimbabwe (AP) — A bus carrying worshipers traveling to an Easter pilgrimage in mountainous eastern Zimbabwe plunged into a gorge, killing 35 people in the early hours of Friday.

The bus was overloaded with 106 passengers and veered off the winding road near Chimanimani and hurtled into a deep ravine, police said. The crash happened near the Chipinge district of Zimbabwe‘s eastern Manicaland province, state broadcaster ZBC reported.

The bus was carrying members of the Zion Christian Church, a local denomination known for holding regular pilgrimages attended by thousands of people.

Bus accidents are frequent in the southern African country, where some drivers overload their vehicles and exceed the speed limit. The poor condition of Zimbabwe’s roads has also been blamed for contributing to crashes.

Zimbabwe’s roads are particularly busy during the Easter period which is a major holiday in this largely Christian country as people embark on hazardous trips in dilapidated buses and trucks to gather for days.

This article originally appeared here.

How Big of an Easter Group Launch in 2022?

Allen White

April 15, 2022

Easter 2022 is an interesting moment. With most of the country easing their COVID restrictions, will people feel free to worship in-person for Easter? Or have two years worth of people watching online sunk in deep? And, considering these mixed feelings going into Easter, how big should the Easter 2022 group launch be? Or should there even be one? Let’s work this out.

Easter is Normally the #3 Group Launch of the Year

Easter is the Trip, Tracy, Trace of group launches. The biggest group launch by far is the fall launch in most places. The second biggest is the New Year. The third is Easter. Now, there are reasons not to launch groups after Easter, but Easter is also the biggest Sunday of the year. Easter is when everybody who calls your church “my church” will be there along with a handful of visitors. Why would you ignore the biggest Sunday of the year when it comes to launching groups? If everybody is there, wouldn’t it be a good idea to start something?

Easter 2022 Is Still Not Normal

Just when we thought that COVID had disappeared, we must acknowledge that COVID has still made everything weird. Pastors in states that just removed their mask mandates are saying that people who were comfortable attending with a mask are now staying home. Maskless worship seems a little too risky for some right now. They’ll be back, but not for a while.

Some people have become comfortable worshipping at home. While I’m a big proponent of digital discipleship, why isn’t the in-person service drawing them in? Why do people feel they don’t need the community of an in-person service? Will they come for Easter or will they stay home?

You may get some first time guests who are not “first time guests.” They’ve never been to your church. They’ve been watching online for a while. Since Easter is a big deal, this just might be the first time they decide to attend in-person. But, here’s the deal, when they show up, they are not technically first time guests. Some have been with you for quite a while. When they show up, they are ready for a next step. They are ready for a small group. They are ready to start growth track. You have to offer them something.

But, there’s another dynamic at play. Similar to the Roaring 20’s that followed the Spanish Influenza, after Easter people will be gone. They have been cooped up too long. The weather is getting warmer. AirBnB is calling. Soccer is kicking off. Baseball is in full swing. Track is…okay, I’ll stop. People are ready to get out. According to the Gauge Group, people will be traveling widely and just won’t be around. So, what does all of this mean for your spring group launch?

Plan an Easter Group Launch, but Lower Your Expectations

As I said before, traditionally an Easter launch is the smallest of the year. But, this Easter you will have some dedicated online worshippers showing up for the first time looking for a next step. Offer them a group. And, while many people will be headed out to enjoy the warm weather, not everyone will be on vacation from Easter until Labor Day. Offer them something too. Even if your groups focus more on group life than group meetings, it’s still worth offering something. But, keep your expectations low. Your Easter launch will not be as far up and to the right as you’d prefer. And, that’s okay. Any progress is progress these days.

Plan for the Fall Small Group Boom

Depending on where you live, your people have experienced various levels of restrictions, freedoms, and fears related to COVID. Some churches are seeing worship attendance equal to or even exceeding their pre-COVID numbers. Most churches are sitting around 50% in worship. Some churches have dramatically declined. COVID accelerated much of what was unfortunately inevitable for some.

How Many Children’s Ministry Staff Members Should You Have?

Dale Hudson

April 15, 2022

As I consult with churches across the country, there is one question that often comes up.

Do we have enough staff members for our children’s ministry?

Before I answer that question, I want to give you some reasons why you should have an adequate number of children’s ministry staff.

Children will bring God’s blessings on your church. Check out what this verse says.

Anyone who welcomes a little child like this on my behalf welcomes me, and anyone who welcomes me welcomes not only me but also my Father who sent me. (Mark 9:37)

Churches that minimize children’s ministry are minimizing Jesus’ blessings on their ministry. But churches that maximize children’s ministry will maximize the blessings of Jesus.

Children’s ministry is important to Jesus. You know the story. Some parents tried bringing their children to Jesus so He could bless them. The disciples saw the children as a bother and tried to deny them access to Jesus. But Jesus saw the children as a blessing. He welcomed them and took time to minister to them. Children’s ministry was a priority to Jesus.

Children’s ministry is one of the biggest growth engines your church can have. Churches that are growing have dynamic children’s ministries. When you reach children, you will often reach their entire family.

Children are the greatest mission field. Children are open and receptive to the Gospel. We have a short window of time to reach them.

Apart from the Pastor, no one influences a broader range of people in the church. Children’s ministry leaders influence adults, children, grandparents, students and parents.

You can see the need for adequate leadership in this important area of the church.

So what should the ratio for staff members to children be?

Ideally…you need to have 1 full time staff member for every 115-125 children. You also have to factor in the number of volunteers that it takes to care for that number of children. Managing that number of volunteers takes lots of effort and time.

This is a good standard to arrange your staffing by. If you have less than this ratio for your ministry, it may be time to have a discussion with your leadership. Bring the above reasons to share with your leadership when you start the conversation of hiring more staff. This will help you present why you need more staff.

When a children’s ministry is short on staff, it can become a lid that hinders growth.

This article originally appeared here and is used by permission.

5 Misconceptions About Pastors’ Wives

Lauren Chandler

April 15, 2022

There are 5 misconceptions about pastors’ wives that each of us should know.

Misconception #1 About Pastors’ Wives

You have it all together. You’ve worked through all your issues. Sure, you may struggle, but not with anything major (whatever that may be).

Oh, sister, may I encourage you? On this side of heaven, we will always have battle to do with our flesh. Will he give relief at times? Yes! But “if we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us” (1 John 1:8). We are off the hook—not to sin so that grace may abound—but to freely live a life pleasing to God that was bought by the perfect blood of Christ, not our own blood, sweat and tears to “get it right.”

Three years into Matt’s position as pastor of The Village Church, I entered a 12-step program. Let me quell the questions: It wasn’t because he became a pastor that I “worked the steps.” I needed to recover from the addiction of being a good girl, of performing my way into God’s good graces. I would have said with my lips that salvation is by grace through faith alone. I even thought I believed this at my core. But in my heart of hearts, I functioned as if it all depended on me. With my life, I said, “God, thanks for saving me but I’ve got it from here.”

On a Thursday night, in front of people who only knew me as their pastor’s wife, I stood up with others to say, “There’s something the Lord is asking me to surrender.” The weight of what people would think of me nearly glued me to my seat, preventing me from standing.

But guess what I felt the moment I rose to my feet? Weightlessness. Relief. And tears. Lots and lots of tears. In all my worry about what the people of The Village would think of me—the gasps I imagined, the whispers—what I found instead was fellowship. I wasn’t the untouchable and unrelatable. I became real to them.

Really in need of a real Savior.

Misconception #2 About Pastors’ Wives

Your gifting should match your husband’s.

Although you and your husband are one flesh, you are not the same person. The way God made you is different than how he made your husband. God knew what he was doing in putting the two of you together. He doesn’t make mistakes.

By God’s grace, be the best “you” you can be. Do you enjoy hosting people in your home? Do you love to teach? Do you come alive when you just get to sit across from another woman pouring out her heart?

Matt is an exceptional preacher and teacher. I have received and accepted multiple invitations to speak and teach, but it is not a burning desire within me. I find myself saying “no” more often than “yes.” To lead worship, on the other hand, is something I eagerly desire to do. It excites me to lead 500 people in song. Matt loves to sing, but, trust me, you don’t want him leading worship in song.

I am not him and he is not me, praise Jesus.

Misconception #3 About Pastors’ Wives

You can kiss having close friends goodbye.

There is wisdom in carefully choosing to whom you disclose your hopes, desires and struggles, especially when doing so sheds light on your husband’s flaws. Not everyone can handle such information with grace and maturity. Don’t buy the lie, though, that you can have no close friends. This will only isolate you and your husband from good fellowship with other believers. Everyone in your church should know that you and your husband are sinners, not because you blatantly participate in sinful acts but because of 1 John 1:8.

My closest friends for the past 12 years have all either been married to staff, on staff or covenant members of our church. I have dear friends who are also in ministry in other cities, states and even countries, but there is something special to having day-in, day-out friends. They see the inconsistencies in my life and are able to speak into it.

Have there been awkward seasons and disagreements? Yes! But God’s steadfast love has shone the most brilliantly when we addressed the awkward and generously forgave and loved one another in the middle of the mess.

Misconception #4 About Pastors’ Wives

You must be friends with everyone.

How is this working for you? Even if you’re not a pastor’s or minister’s wife, how deeply are you able to know everyone with whom you come into contact? It’s impossible to be the same kind of friend to everyone. You can try it, but most—if not all—of your relationships will be an inch deep. We are limited! It’s a practice in humility to acknowledge that we can’t be everyone’s close friend and must trust the Lord to meet that need in us and them.

That being said, if your friend circle is so tight that it hasn’t changed in years, do some examination. Is your group of friends hospitable or alienating? You can’t control what others think, but you can be warm, amiable and willing to be flexible, guarding against trading depth for width.

Misconception #5 About Pastors’ Wives

Your kids are the most sanctified in your church.

Our faith is not an inheritable trait. Although our homes should model what Scripture outlines for a family, our children are individuals with their own faiths. As my husband often says, we can gather all the kindling we can find around their hearts: family devotions, talking of Scripture as we go, modeling forgiveness by asking for it and giving it freely, expressing our own need for the Savior, and praying for their salvation. But, it takes a movement of the Holy Spirit to ignite the flame of faith.

Our kids are like anyone else’s. They are going to fail. They will choose poorly. My kids are at church a lot. They know all the nooks and crannies, all the stashes of mints and crackers. The staff knows them and they know the staff. This comfort factor can often get them in trouble. Unlike most of the non-staff kids at church, they let their guards down. They don’t feel the need to be on their best behavior. Although we train them to be respectful, they have their moments—as we all do. They’re in need of Jesus as much as the next kid.

Resources on Understanding Issues of Race

Sam Luce

April 15, 2022

Growing up in Norwegian middle America without television, I don’t remember even seeing a person of color until I was around 11 years old. I was always a reader and always loved history. I read about issues of race and the awful treatment of persons of color in our country. It broke my heart then and it breaks my heart still.

Coming to a greater realization of race being a broader issue rather than only a personal one has been and continues to be a journey. One that we all need to be on together.

I enjoy social media (most of the time). For me, it’s more of a hobby and a way to hear what’s happening in the world without having to watch the news (something I never do). I have learned over the past twelve years to take social media with a grain of salt and extend grace to those on it because we don’t always say things the right way. I prefer long-form content like blog posts and books. I enjoy reading, and the journey I have been on to see the world through someone else’s eyes has been a long, meandering unexpected journey. It has taught me as most good books do that I have much to learn.

The first book I read on race was the story of William Wilberforce and his fight to abolish the slave trade. It was that book that leads me to read the theology and biographies of John Newton. John’s story is a wild story of a young man who grew up with slaves, became enslaved himself, came to faith, and then became a slave ship captain as a Christian. He eventually became the catalyst for the abolition of the slave trade in England and the West Indies.

The next book that came across my path was a result of a personal curiosity with why people of color refer to other people of color as “Uncle Toms.” I have my children read classic works of literature over the summers so two years ago I read Uncle Tom’s Cabin with my oldest boy. I cried through much of it and marveled at the faith and Christ-likeness of many of the African characters.

As a result of reading Uncle Tom’s Cabin, I resolved to start reading more books about people of color written by persons of color. I have done this for a while with female authors but decided to start reading books about how our country has treated Africans and African Americans through their eyes.

I will be honest. It has not been easy. There is so much growing up in a sea of white that I missed. There is so much that I didn’t see, not because I closed my eyes but because I turned my head.

The books I am looking to read are ones that are truth-telling and redemptive. This doesn’t mean that the ink spilled on the pages of books doesn’t accurately describe the horrors of the blood that cries out from the ground against our country. The difference is what is the worldview of the author, what is their teleological framework.

I started with The Color of Compromise: The Truth About the American Church’s Complicity in Racism by Jamar Tisby. I love the church. I’ve worked at the same church for 23 years. This book was hard to read. To read how so many of my brothers have been tortured and killed in the name of God is not a light subject but is necessary. We can’t heal what we don’t name. Racism is not just evil it’s a sin.

I am a huge Malcolm Gladwell fan. I listen to all his podcasts and have read every one of his books and always read his new book as soon as it comes out. In God’s providence, Malcolm’s new book was Talking to Strangers: What We Should Know About the People We Don’t Know (I recommend the Audiobook version). In this book, Gladwell talks about the issues of race and sexual abuse that were hard to hear. The story he tells of Sandra Bland it is gut-wrenching. Gladwell has a way of communicating that connects with how I learn. What he has to say in this book profoundly stuck me.

As I read each of these books, I was moved to tears, and I am not a book crier. I was moved because I realized what I did with the issues of race was turn my head. I did what I do with all the sad things; I know they are real but pretend they aren’t true. I used to tell myself that people who had died were still alive somewhere in the world because I couldn’t bear to deal with the loss. In God’s good providence, this unhealthy way of dealing with pain is beginning to change in my life. In the past several years, I have encountered difficult circumstances that have forced me to re-evaluate what I think when I think of God.

I have come to see that I need his mercy more than ever. In times of difficulty and sorrow, I need a picture of what God is like. I need to be reminded as Paul reminded the church at Philippi

Philippians 2:5-8
⁵In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus:
⁶Who, being in very nature^[a] God,
did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage;
⁷rather, he made himself nothing
by taking the very nature^[b] of a servant,
being made in human likeness.
⁸And being found in appearance as a man,
he humbled himself
by becoming obedient to death—
even death on a cross!

May we grow in the grace God provides. May we love each other as Christ has loved us. May we like Christ never use our influence for our own advantage.

I haven’t read these books but they are next on my list of books to read for understanding issues of race.

The Warmth of Other Suns
Under Our Skin
United: Captured by God’s Vision for Diversity

This article about resources to understand issues of race originally appeared here.

I Believe in Prayer – Or Do I?

Sammy Adebiyi

April 15, 2022

I believe in prayer–or do I? Maybe not. It’s Simple. Because I don’t pray. If I really believed in the kind of prayer Jesus spoke of, you would have to consistently pull me off my knees by my dreads. But I’m a pastor. I should pray because it’s in my job description. I know, but that’s the problem.

I Believe in Prayer – Or Do I?

I DO pray, but most of the time, if I’m honest, I pray like I don’t really believe in prayer. I pray like it’s my “job.” I pray because I don’t want to go another day without having my quiet time.

I pray because it’s a nice transition. I pray to be spiritual.

I don’t think that’s what Jesus had in mind when he invited us to pray. I also don’t believe God is sitting in heaven with a clipboard trying to track who said grace before chowing down on his or her ribs.

No people. No Sammy…No. God IS God.

He conquered the grave.

He spoke the universe into existence.

He holds the entire cosmos in the palm of his hands.

He is unstoppable.

He is wholly Holy.

He is always good.

He declares the end from the beginning.

He holds time in the palm of his hands.

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8 Spiritual Growth Questions to Ask Small Group Members

1. What are you reading in the Bible, and how is it challenging you to grow?

2. What have you been praying about, and how is God working your life through prayer?

3. When did you get baptized? If you have not been baptized, what’s challenging for you to pursue it?

4. What are your spiritual gifts? How are you using the gifts God gave you to serve others?

5. Who are you sharing your faith with and what’s the biggest challenge you face?

6. How are you financially giving and investing in the church?

7. When did you become a church member? If you have not pursued membership, what’s challenging you to pursue it?

8. What’s your spiritual next step?

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Misconception #5 About Pastors’ Wives

I haven’t read these books but they are next on my list of books to read for understanding issues of race.

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