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Church Management Software Relationship Status – It’s Complicated

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If you were able to post a relationship status for your church and your church management software it would probably be “It’s Complicated.” More often than not, it isn’t “In Love” or “Happily Ever After.” What is it that makes Church Management Software (ChMS) such a complex issue in churches?

A lot of the complication comes from within a church or ministry. Departments within ministries often operate as independent silos, creating tension when a ChMS solution is implemented and tries to integrate data together with procedures ministry wide. Church politics lead to churches using multiple management systems, or to constantly-changing software platforms.

Changing platforms further complicates the relationship status. An immense amount of resources must be invested in making a ChMS change. During this process, these resources are not being invested in the ministry itself but rather in the process to do ministry. This creates a real drain on ministry effectiveness in the short term (or every time you switch ChMS providers).

Another complicating factor comes from the users of the software. Users who are not well trained often want to change — not because they need to change but because they have not been trained in the capabilities of the software they currently use. This creates a vicious cycle of resource drain going from ChMS to ChMS. This cycle can only be broken by properly investing in training for staff. As staff turns over, the goal should not be to replace the ChMS with whatever the new staffer is used to, but rather to invest in training the new staffer to be successful and effective with the exiting tools.

While there is no doubt politics in churches plays a role in the complicated status between ministries and ChMS, there is also the changing ChMS landscape itself. Church software is no longer by the church for the church. ChMS has become an industry of its own. Not an industry of non-profits serving non-profits, but rather for-profits profiting from non-profits. To be clear, I’m not saying ChMS providers should give their products away. They need a business model to be able to support their users and continue investment in updates, development, and quality control.

The complication comes as the industry loses its heart for the ministries they serve. Does your ChMS provider have a heart for the lost in your town? Do they care about how their products and services affect your ability to grow the eternal Kingdom or is your ministry a sales figure?

Instead of focusing on making changes, try focusing on what your current system can do. Find a ministry partner who will help you succeed and make it your goal not to change providers. If you have to change (for whatever reason) make it your goal to make this the last change. Keep the focus on ministry, not complicating ministry with spending time on figuring out how to do ministry.

 

Jonathan Smith is the Director of Technology at Faith Ministries in Lafayette, IN. You can reach Jonathan at jsmith@faithlafayette.org and follow him on Twitter @JonathanESmith.

This article was published in MinistryTech Magazine. Subscribe for free.

It’s Official: UMC Votes for Traditional Marriage, No Gay Clergy

United Methodist Church homosexuality
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In the final day of the United Methodist Church’s Special Session of the General Conference, the denomination voted to take an official stance on homosexuality. After decades of ambiguity, the UMC’s General Conference has voted to hold a traditional approach to marriage and ordaining clergy. Moving forward, the UMC will not allow same-sex weddings, nor will it ordain LGBTQ+ clergy.

“We do not want to force any church to leave the denomination,” Beth Ann Cook told a raucous crowd after the final vote was settled.

Despite the bishops’ attempt to address the elephant in the room graciously, the backlash from those opposed to the Traditional Plan made it clear that this vote will cause many churches (particularly in the U.S.) and LGBTQ+ clergy members to leave the denomination.

While most delegates from the Central Conference of the UMC, which represents churches in Africa, Europe and Asia, rejoiced over the decision, the general feeling of the delegates from the U.S. was one of dismay.

United Methodist Church Homosexuality Question Settled

A motion to substitute the One Church Plan for the Traditional Plan was defeated early in the day by a vote of 449 against and 374 in favor. Later, less than two hours before the General Conference was scheduled to adjourn, delegates voted on and passed the Traditional Plan by a vote of 438 for and 384 against.

The Judicial Council of the Church deemed several components of the Traditional Plan unconstitutional. While the day was intended to be spent making adjustments to the plan to make it constitutional, the amendments, motions and discussions brought forward by the delegates digressed into impassioned speeches for and against the Traditional Plan. According to United Methodist News, the Judicial Council will address the parts deemed unconstitutional at its next scheduled meeting April 23-25 in Evanston, Illinois.

The moderators of the discussion had a monumental job in keeping delegates on task and following the rules of conferencing. Over 35,000 people tuned in to the general conference via livestream, speaking to the gravity of the vote.

The Traditional Plan is favored by those in the church who wish to maintain a traditional view of marriage as being between one man and one woman. It also tightens restrictions on homosexuals who wish to serve as clergy members. Others that leaned toward allowing the church to perform same-sex weddings and ordaining openly homosexual clergy were in favor of the One Church Plan, which would allow individual churches to decide where they land on the issue of homosexual marriage and LGBTQ+ clergy.

Major Arguments for the One Church Plan

Those in favor of the One Church Plan, such as Reverend Thomas Berlin, admonished delegates from the Central Conference to vote for the plan because it would not require them to change their practices but it would allow churches in the U.S. to be inclusive of LGBTQ+ people. Berlin called the Traditional Plan a “virus” that would make the American church “sick.”

Several young people gathered around a microphone with delegate Shayla Jordan about halfway through the day. Jordan gave the case for the One Church Plan, saying the majority of young people in the UMC supported it. She appealed to the older generations to think about the young people who would leave the church over a decision for the Traditional Plan. Jordan said there was a petition with over 15,000 signatures of young people who support the One Church Plan.

Reverend Adam Hamilton accused the more conservative Wesleyan Covenant Association (WCA) of trying to push centrists and progressives out of the UMC. Hamilton said he was tired of hearing people say, “The Bible says it. I believe it,” without considering that some people who revere and study Scripture as much as they do interpret it differently. He also pointed out what he believes is hypocrisy in circles such as the WCA who read the passages of Paul which instruct women to keep silent, to submit, to not wear jewelry, etc. and disregard those instructions due to their cultural context, yet don’t do the same when Paul talks about same-sex acts in the New Testament.

Hamilton then made a remark about the fact that the conference spent the better part of a day discussing pensions for clergy members when the Bible speaks repeatedly about not “laying up for oneself treasures on the earth.” Delegate Emanuel Cleaver made a similar statement when he said the conference was overlooking so many more pressing issues such as lack of women in leadership and lack of representation by African Americans in the denomination. “If we’re going to get biblical, let’s get real biblical,” Cleaver said. He argued that while the Bible only mentions homosexuality a handful of times, it spends much more time addressing issues of injustice and poverty.

Pastor in South Africa Claims He Raised a Man from the Dead

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Pastor Alph Lukau, who leads Alleluia Ministries International in Johannesburg, South Africa, has claimed that he performed a miracle by restoring a man to life during a church service on February 24. Lukau is now under investigation from the Commission for the Promotion and Protection of the Rights of Cultural, Religious and Linguistic Communities (CRL Rights Commission).

“There are no such things as miracles. They are made up to try to get money from the hopelessness of our people,” said the CRL Rights Commission as reported by the BBC.

The police have opened a case to investigate the circumstances surrounding the “resurrection,” and at least one of the funeral companies involved is suing Lukau.

You can watch a video of the three hour long service that occurred last Sunday here. The part that concerns the alleged resurrection starts around 1:54:00, which is when the hearse arrives. A woman who appears to be a leader in the church tells Lukau that there is a family that is about to take a corpse to Zimbabwe. She says that as the hearse drove over the church door, someone saw the fingers of the corpse “beginning to move.” (It’s not clear how this would have been possible, since the “corpse” was in a covered coffin.)

Lukau steps outside to meet with the family, and a few minutes later in the video, he and people claiming to be the man’s family and landlord stand around the opened coffin, surrounded by the congregation. A woman who says she is the “dead” man’s landlord says with emotion,

“He got sick. He got sicker and sicker and then he started coughing a lot on Friday. Then we took him to the hospital. And then the doctor said cause he’s got no papers, they can’t help him, until we send him to the surgery doctor. That is where he died in my hands.” She breaks down sobbing.

A man who says he is the man’s brother tells Lukau that the body has been in the mortuary. The whole time that Lukau is speaking to the brother and landlord, the man in the coffin’s mouth and chest are moving and his eyes are open. He is clearly breathing, something Lukau seems to point out, although it’s unclear if that’s what he meant.

Holding his microphone, Lukau proclaims to the congregants, “He died since Friday!” and “He was in a mortuary.” Lukau repeats Jesus’ name several times, then asks for the man’s name, which is Eliot. Bending over the “corpse,” Lukau addresses Eliot by name, repeating it several times. He then tells the people around him to lift their hands. He hands over his microphone, places his hands on Eliot, and calls out, “Rise up!” Immediately, the man sits up with his mouth gaping as the people start to yell and cheer.

Church attendees help Eliot out of the coffin and Lukau calls out, “The coffin is empty!” A woman declares, “This is a miracle! Jesus!”

People Aren’t Buying It

According to the BBC, the funeral parlors that provided their services, such as the hearse and the coffin, have been quick to distance themselves from the “miracle” and at least one is taking legal action against Pastor Lukau.

“The funeral parlours herein were used individually and separately through various forms of misrepresentations to suit a particular outcome which at the time was unknown to the funeral parlours,” said Prince Mafu, speaking on behalf of Kings and Queens Funeral Services. The other companies involved were Kingdom Blue and Black Phoenix. All three say they were manipulated, and at least two of the companies deny ever having seen the body of the man who was supposedly dead.

People on social media, particularly Twitter, have been quick to point out other problems with the alleged miracle. For one, the “body” was sweating when the coffin was opened. One Twitter user says she used to work at a funeral parlor and that “the mouth gets stitched and sealed, the eyes get glued and there’s a special lotion for the face. That dead guy looks like he walked out a spa.” Another took a screenshot of the video and pointed out what appears to be a cell phone in the man’s pocket. In true Twitter fashion, the incident quickly became a joke, turning into the #ResurrectionChallenge.

Material Blessings: A Running Theme

Lukau has been the subject of controversy in the past, although apparently has not been investigated by the CRL Rights Commission until now.

In 2016, he held a gala for single and divorced women so they could receive prayer and find husbands. The gala cost anywhere between R450 and R5000, which is currently about $32 and $360 U.S. dollars, respectively. The next Sunday, Lukau’s church held a mass wedding for the women who attended the gala. Lukau has also claimed to heal various diseases and illnesses.

A cursory glance of Pastor Lukau’s Facebook page shows many pictures of him and many posts assuring material blessings. One post says, “Today God will break physical and spiritual barriers standing in the way of your financial miracles. Just as God remembered Hannah and Sarah, He is remembering you for great financial favour this month in Jesus name.”

Another promises, “This season, Almighty God will open one great door that will lead you to many other great doors of breakthroughs and unlimited success. The Lord God will send u a financial blessing that will write off all your debts and make u a lender to nations.” The comments on this post are full of people saying “Amen” and “I receive it in Jesus name.”

In the days that have followed this controversy, Alleluia Ministries International has said that the man was not dead when he arrived at the service, but that Lukau “completed a miracle that God had already started.”

Ten Biblical Truths on Disciplining Children

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Two years ago, I must have struck a nerve with the article “Parents, Require Obedience of Your Children.” It has proved to be one of our most visited resources.

In view of that, I thought it might be helpful to go behind that article and give a deeper, wider biblical basis for rearing and disciplining children. My guess is that most of us parent by intuition and tradition. That’s not all bad. Parenting is an art, not a science. And artists do not consult manuals as they paint.

But our human intuitions and traditions should be shaped by God’s revelation. So think of this article as a short lesson about some things God has revealed in the Bible that give foundation and guidance for our parenting.

We’ll start with the very basics about disciplining children.

1. Marriage between one man and one woman for life is God’s plan for the procreation and rearing of children.

The lifelong covenant of marriage between a man and a woman is God’s original idea for the human race. It is modeled on, and rooted in, God’s eternal plan to redeem a bride for his Son—the church.

A man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. (Genesis 2:24)

From the beginning of creation, “God made them male and female.” “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate. (Mark 10.6–9″>Mark 10:6–9)

“A man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. (Ephesians 5:31–32)

2. The covenant union of marriage was the way God planned to fill the earth with human beings who would reflect his glory by their faith and creative productivity.

God blessed them. And God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it, and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over every living thing that moves on the earth.” (Genesis 1:28)

3. Children were not to be conceived outside of the covenant of marriage. For that reason—and others—sexual relations were denied to the unmarried, and adultery was forbidden to the married.

Flee from sexual fornication. (1 Corinthians 6:18)

You shall not commit adultery. (Romans 13:9)

Why Listening Is So Powerful in Small Group Ministry

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Why Listening Is So Powerful in Small Group Ministry

In a world full of talking, tweeting, posting and opinionating, the power of listening may have never been more in need. People seem to have a built-in desire to be heard, and they are willing to do whatever it takes to let their thoughts and feelings be known to anyone and everyone around them. Talk, vent, explode, shout to just make sure your voice is audible above the crowd.

And then there is God. In a time when it seems His voice is so needed, in a time when we plead for Him to speak, in a time when we would love to read a blog from God Almighty himself, God is silent. Quiet. Seemingly mute. And if we are not careful, we can equate the silence with absence or apathy. But God is not gone or uncaring, He is active and engaged…just not in the way we would do it. Instead of speaking, He is listening.

  • God heard the boy (Genesis 21:17)
  • God heard their groaning (Exodus 2:24)
  • God heard them (many times in the Psalms)

And Jesus was no different; he listened over and over again. So, what if there is an example in that for us? In a world of noise, what if the real power lies in being quiet and listening. It turns out that there really is power in listening, being quiet and attentive, seeking to understand, and showing care and compassion.

Sometimes we get so busy trying to do things and fix things that we fail to slow down and listen. Mary was commended by Jesus for sitting still and listening, while Martha was admonished for belittling the power of listening and elevating her service.

Great leaders are great listeners. Emulate our Lord and Savior and spend some time listening to those around you who are hurting and lonely. Make listening a hallmark of your Community Group.

My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry. James 1:19 (NIV)

This article originally appeared here.

14-Point Leadership Check Up: Mistakes That Will Hurt Your Leadership

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Take this leadership check up for yourself.

I just completed my annual physical.

Going through the process of a thorough check-up from head to toe is not much fun, but it’s a smart thing to do. My doctor is excellent and very thorough. He starts with my vital signs, does extensive bloodwork, and then checks for things that might indicate a health issue.

It’s a good idea to do the same thing as a leader. It’s best to focus on the positive things that will strengthen your leadership, but it’s also smart to check your habits against a list of things that could hurt you over the long-haul.

Leadership isn’t easy, but it’s one of the most rewarding endeavors imaginable. Leadership is more art than science, more fluid than structured, and more messy than clean. Therefore, any help we can get for a quick leadership check up is helpful.

That’s what I’ve written for you here. I could probably list 25 things, but these 14 are at the top and a good place to start.

  • Which ones are you doing well?
  • Which ones need improvement?
  • How about the leaders you coach?

You can take them through this as a developmental tool. Let them evaluate themselves, and then you ask questions that lead to offering insights and ideas to help them get better.

14-Point Leadership Check Up

(These things will hurt your leadership if you do them repeatedly over time.)

1) Thinking small

Negative thoughts, feeling hand-cuffed or unempowered, and avoiding risk are all forms of small thinking. There are so many competing agendas, voices that must be heard, and seemingly non-negotiable expectations that when mixed with limited resources and finite energy it’s easy to fall prey to small thinking.

I sometimes catch myself praying big but then leading small, that only happens when I think small. The same can be true for you. Pray big, think big, lead large.

  • In what area or circumstance are you most tempted to think small?

2) Jumping to conclusions

Fast is the new norm, and too fast can get you in trouble. There is always another side to the story. Always. Take time to get the facts. Sometimes just (literally) counting to five before you say something, or press send, can keep you out of hot water. In other situations, a few days may be required.

If someone pushes your buttons, don’t over-react. Instead, when you feel your amperage rising, intentionally power down a notch. It’s much easier to respond with wisdom when your foot is not in your mouth.

  • Do you consistently take the time to hear the other side of the story?
  • Can you resist speaking or reacting too quickly?
  • Do you find yourself interrupting others when they are talking?

3) Resisting change

You know that resisting change is a poor use of your time and energy both personally and professionally. If you don’t change, you can’t grow. And if you don’t innovate your ministries to keep up with the changes in culture, your ministry will get stuck.

  • What’s the last personal change you made and successfully adapted to?
  • What was your most recent change in how you operate a particular ministry?

4) Avoiding risk

It is possible to avoid risk, but you can’t lead and escape risk at the same time. It’s impossible to cast vision and make progress without taking some risks. It might be a big project or a tough conversation. You don’t need to take a foolish blind leap of faith, but you’ll never fully know the future; therefore, risk is required. Pray, trust God, plan and lead!

  • Is there any risk you are avoiding?
  • What is the current risk you’re taking?

5) Starting but not finishing

I’ll let you in on a little secret, not finishing what you start frustrates the people you work with and lead. Being a self-starter and taking the initiative is good, but not if you don’t finish. If you do this often enough it can start to reflect on your character.

If you have too many unfinished projects, it’s better to prioritize them and let your team know which ones you are going to kill so that you can finish the most important ones.

  • What important unfinished project do you need to finish?

3 Things I Taught My Children About Daily Time With God

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I believe one of the most essential parts of Christian discipleship is teaching people how to have a time with God daily. When my sons were elementary age boys, I taught them these things.

If we can teach our son to throw a football or our daughter gymnastics, we can teach our children how to have a daily time with God. If we can teach our friends how to close a business deal or how to decorate a home, we can teach our friends how to walk with Christ daily.

I will stay brief today even though there is so much more to share.

3 Things I Taught My Children About Daily Time With God

  1. Practice Prayer

Prayer is a conversation with God. Prayer is not just you talking to God, but it involves you listening to God. Daily, I begin my time with God in prayer. Practice prayer.

Whether you are a rookie or a seasoned veteran in your spiritual life, prayer is one of the great disciplines in the life of the believer. Develop your prayer life. Learn how to pray.

While I am no authority on prayer, I do pray and believe in the power of prayer. Prayer built upon the Scriptures takes it to another level.

Take the time to organize your prayer life. When you do, you will find your prayer life becoming much more meaningful and perhaps even extended.

Interweaving with prayer is the second component in my daily time with God…

2. Read the Bible

The most transforming discipline in my walk with Christ is the daily reading of the Bible. Nothing is more powerful than the Holy Scriptures. When the Scriptures speak, our God is speaking to us.

From my youngest years, I was taught the value of the Bible and its impact upon my life. Read the Bible daily.

The increasing impact of the Scriptures happened to me when I began to read the Bible through each year, and since 1990, I have read the Bible through at least one time annually. In this last decade or so, it may be closer to one and one-half times per year.

The point is this: The more I read the Scriptures, the more I want to read the Scriptures. Faith is built upon the Word of God, not upon the words of others. In this noisy world filled with voices that amplify negativity and forecast constant doom, I must have the Bible, God’s Word, consume me daily.

It is the Bible that anchors my faith. It is the Bible that sustains and ignites my prayer life. It is the Bible, the Word of the Living God, that serves as my filter to separate all untruth from my life.

3. Keep a Journal 

In 1990, God led me to not just read through the entire Bible, but to daily begin one of the most meaningful practices I have done in my walk with Christ. When I have completed my daily prayer and Scripture reading time, I close my time with God by writing no less than a one-page prayer to God.

This prayer to God that is written down in a journal daily often becomes a documentation of God working in my life. I have volumes and volumes of these prayer journal books that go back to this daily discipline that I began in 1990. Still to this day, I do this. The only change is that on most days, the letters exceed a page or two.

There is something powerful about transferring your greatest burdens and most special moments with God on to the pages of a journal.

Back to the Basics

How is your daily time with God going? Maybe today is a reminder that it is time to go back to the basics of walking with Christ daily.

This article originally appeared here.

This Is Why Singing in Church Matters

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Have you ever wondered about singing in church? Is it really necessary, every time we gather together as the people of God, that we sing?

It makes sense for people who like to sing. But what if you don’t?

But then I come across portions of scripture like this:

Be filled with the Spirit, addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart (Ephesians 5:18-19).

This is no isolated verse, jolted out of context. Did you know the Bible contains over 400 references to singing?

King David not only commanded it be done, appointing people to do so, but also created instruments that were designed for praise.

Woah. This is a big deal. And there’s a reason music and singing in church is a huge part of the gathered church.

Vertical and Horizontal

There is a horizontal and a vertical aspect to singing in church. Did you know this?

Horizontal in that we sing to encourage one another. To lift each other up. To love one another. The Bible doesn’t call us to perform for one another. We are on level ground with our congregation, gazing up at the glory of Jesus.

I always find it interesting when Christians lambaste the “corporate” church and minimize the gathering of God’s people. There’s nothing wrong with meeting in homes as a small group, but there’s something special when the Bride of Christ gathers together.

I have a responsibility. You have a responsibility. We are a body of imperfect people. We are hypocrites in more ways than one. But that doesn’t give us the license to shun the bride whom Jesus died for.

That’s why it’s not enough to just listen to your worship music instead of singing with your church. That fosters independence and we need interdependence. We need each other.

For Worship Team Vocalists

If you sing on a worship team, there’s something very important for you to realize.

The purpose of our singing is to help people sing.

We sing, and lead, and express ourselves not to find our own voice, but to help people discover theirs. We want to help the church sing, discover who they are in Christ, and encounter His presence.

But we also sing to the Lord.

In a sense, all of creation is singing, declaring the greatness of God. The rivers, the wind, the trees, the towering mountains. By their existence they exalt God. But we as the people of God have a special privilege—to praise God by our existence but also to praise him with our song.

Seven Reasons Why Singing in Church Matters

Singing in church matters. Here are a few reasons why:

1. Singing Is Commanded in Scripture – This isn’t an upgrade for deeper Christians. This isn’t a suggestion. The Bible commands us to sing to the Lord. His glory compels us.

2. Our God Is a Singing God – I love this verse in Matthew 26:30, “And when they had sung a hymn, they went out to the Mount of Olives.” Before Jesus was given up to be crucified, he sang with his disciples. Zephaniah 3:17 also says, “The Lord your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness.”

3. Singing Engages Our Memory – The songs we sing shape us and form us. Primarily because we remember them. They stick with us. Through joyful times and dark times they provide us with an anchor of hope.

4. Singing Engages Our Emotions – Worship is more than just agreeing with theology. C.S. Lewis said, “I think we delight to praise what we enjoy because the praise not merely expresses but completes the enjoyment; it is its appointed consummation.” While we don’t want to worship emotionalism, singing and worship helps us find the best outlet for our emotions. It compels us to sing.

5. Singing Is an Overflow of Seeing – I once heard someone say a healthy church is a singing church. Because the overflow of seeing God at work is to praise Him for his vast excellencies. The more we see, the more we want to sing and be in the presence of such an amazing God.

6. Singing Unifies a Congregation – Singing in church unifies. It’s the best way to bring together a large group of people from diverse backgrounds and experiences and focus them on a single goal. I remember seeing U2 in concert. Thousands upon thousands of people singing together.

7. Singing Is Our Battle Plan – Worship is the way we do war. We don’t face our giants and fight our battles in our own strength. We simply lift up the name of Jesus and watch Him work. He is our breakthrough. He is our answer.

In some ways, we need to be less concerned with the practicalities of our singing and more concerned about the spiritual fire of our presence.

Good singing in church matters. Tone matters. Control matters.

So lead with a fire in your bones. Open Your Eyes. Smile. Own every lyric. Lead Worship. Be Bold. And watch what God will do.

Question: What have you learned about singing in church? What helps you do what you do more effectively?

This article originally appeared here.

The Death and Resurrection of Youth Ministry

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The Death and Resurrection of Youth Ministry

So will it be with the resurrection of the dead. The body that is sown is perishable, it is raised imperishable; it is sown in dishonor, it is raised in glory; it is sown in weakness, it is raised in power; it is sown a natural body, it is raised a spiritual body.”                                     1 Corinthians 15:42-44

Because of the literal, physical resurrection of Jesus from the dead, those of us who have put our faith in Him are guaranteed a literal, physical resurrection as well. Our unremarkable bodies will be sown like flower seeds in the ground. Then, at the resurrection from the dead, they will rise from the dirt and gloriously bloom with incomparable beauty.

I can’t wait for the final resurrection! As Paul wrote in Romans 8:23, “Not only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption to sonship, the redemption of our bodies.

Without death and burial, there can be no resurrection. It’s true of seeds planted in the ground. It’s true of our bodies. And it’s true of youth ministryYouth ministry must “die” in its current form for it to experience a glorious resurrection.

Teenagers are looking for more than entertaining games, relational connection and a nice little life lesson from the Bible. Teenagers are looking for a King, a Cause and a Community. And there’s no better King than Jesus (Daniel 7:13,14), no better cause than making disciples (Matthew 28:18-20) and no better community than the people of God (Ephesians 4:15,16).

What does the death of youth ministry look like? It’s simply a gut-level admission of the overall failure of typical youth ministry, an unshakable willingness to leave the typical behind and a Spirit-fueled determination to build a Gospel Advancing, disciple multiplying, God-glorifying youth ministry based on the book of Acts.

Death is hard and funerals can trigger tears. But this is all part of the grieving process when it comes to saying goodbye to our old form of youth ministry and embracing the even older one (2,000 years older!).

Just remember that after death comes resurrection! What will this resurrection of youth ministry look like? Perhaps like this… 

And when they had prayed, the place in which they were gathered together was shaken, and they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and continued to speak the word of God with boldness. Now the full number of those who believed were of one heart and soul, and no one said that any of the things that belonged to him was his own, but they had everything in common. And with great power the apostles were giving their testimony to the resurrection of the Lord Jesus, and great grace was upon them all.” Acts 4:31-33

The King, The Cause and The Community!

Sure, there can still be pizza and games in this new/old form of youth ministry, but the overall emphasis of it will be the resurrected Christ and a re-engagement of the mission He gave to all of us before ascending into heaven. This mission is to be vibrant and bold witnesses across the street, across the tracks and across the world (Acts 1:8).

When a youth ministry makes this shift, it may feel like a funeral at first. Some teens may leave in tears and a few parents and pastors may grieve. But once the resurrection takes place, your youth ministry will become a party with a very defined purpose.

If you’re ready to bury your current form of youth ministry and see something new and better resurrected, click here. But gird yourself. Death can be hard. But it’s so worth it when you see what happens three days (or three months) later.

This article originally appeared here.

Raising Kids in the Truth When They’re Surrounded by Lies

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It is a real challenge for Christian parents raising kids in the truth when they’re surrounded by the world’s lies.

“My 16-year-old wants Instagram and I won’t let her have it. Is that bad?”

It was an honest question from a mom after one of my recent parent workshops.

“Why don’t you let her have Instagram?”I asked.

“Well…it’s social media, and that’s bad…right?” She replied indecisively.

“When she’s 18 and she goes off to college, do you think she’ll get it?”

“Yeah. Absolutely.”

I decided to respond with a rhetorical question: “And then she’ll have to navigate the world of social media on her own?”

This mom isn’t alone. Parenting the smartphone generation isn’t easy. We want to protect them from many of the potential dangers that truly exist, but the question we need to ask is, “Will they ever learn if I keep making all the decisions for them?”

Where will your kids adopt their values from: our bonding time with them, or our boundaries we impose?

Think about it. Because it’s probably the biggest question Christian parents struggle with today—raising kids in the truth when they’re surrounded by lies. And the go-to response for many panic-stricken parents is to “tighten the grip” to protect their kids. Tighten up on the boundaries.

One problem.

It doesn’t work.

Two Truths for Raising Kids in the Truth

No, I’m not telling you to let your kids do whatever they want. Far from it. I’m just emphasizing two truths:

1. We can’t protect our kids from everything!

We can buy every porn filter, phone monitoring software, router based filtering system…or even ban our kids from all entertainment media! But if they have friends, play sports or go to school (yes, even Christian schools)…they will be exposed to enticing imagery and ideas. All the parental controls in the world aren’t substitutes for conversations about truth.

2. Our kids glean more from our conversations than they do from our rules.

Which do you think has a bigger impact on our kids’ lives? Our banning them from using Instagram, or our conversation where we asked them:

“When it comes to posting pics, what kind of pics do you think come back to harm young people today?”

Here’s the scary truth about the boundaries many of today’s parents impose on their kids. They think rules and restrictions allow them to parent in autopilot mode. Newsflash. There is no autopilot in parenting. Parenting takes a lot of work.

It’s waaaaaaaay easier to just tell our kids “no R-rated movies, but PG-13 is OK,” than to have a conversation where we ask, “Do you think you should watch this?”

Conversations are where our kids glean wisdom and values.

And here’s the kicker. When I surveyed hundreds of parents for my new book, If I Had a Parenting Do Over, asking them about their biggest parenting regret…the overwhelming majority said it was in the area of bonding. Less than 2 percent of parents said they wished they had imposed more boundaries.

Don’t underestimate the impact of bonding.

For more about this struggle, take a peek at the brand new article I just posted on our TheSource4Parents.com “Parenting Help” page, Bonding or Boundaries: Which do you lean toward?

This article originally appeared here.

Could Your Growing Ministry Be Responsible for Your Shrinking Passion?

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What do you do when your pastoring passion is shrinking?

It happens to us all, so we better have some answers.

Unfortunately, too many of our answers involve walking away from ministry, from our current churches, and from even our families, friends and ourselves.

A loss of passion can happen for many, many reasons. I’d like for us to consider one of the most common and equally hidden reasons of them all. I stumbled upon this truth a year or two ago. I was in a funk. I was partially questioning my role, my responsibilities and even ministry as a profession. I was considering re-entering the marketplace. As I began contemplating how I arrived in the funk, I realized over time our church (and everything around it) had grown somewhat substantially. Initially, this realization didn’t connect any dots. But, it did begin to launch a discovery process.

To go back in time a bit… In the beginning years, we would have staff meeting in my car on the way to lunch. We were a much smaller church with way fewer resources. The entire staff served as the president and the janitor. We were all needed for basically every element of ministry that happened in and through our church. As we grew, we added staff. We added complexity. We added complications. We added a building. Throughout the change, our roles and responsibilities also changed. As the lead pastor, I continued to function as the president, but the janitorial elements I often did in the past faded away. We had other staff to handle some of the things I used to do.

Wait a second, though. Isn’t that supposed to be a good thing? Aren’t we supposed to grow and evolve in our roles and our churches (or organizations) grow? After all, this is what we hope for, right? This is what we pray for and dream about.

If you’re not quite there yourself, isn’t this what you are praying, dreaming and hoping for in your church?

And that’s why this element of passion depression is so hidden and difficult to uncover.

In the early days of any church or organization, everyone is involved on the ground floor—staff, volunteers and anyone else we can find. The ground floor is dirty. But it’s also where the mission and vision have legs. The ground floor is where life change isn’t just a story, but a person. The ground floor is wonderful, and in my case, I was accidentally removed from it. Our growing church had grown me away from my first love, the ground floor of ministry. That’s not easy to spot. It’s so subtle, so hidden and so powerful.

Just a couple of questions before I tell you what I chose to do:

  • Is your passion withering as your church is growing?
  • Are you searching to find the same excitement or enthusiasm you once had?
  • Is your job today different than it was a year or two ago?
  • Is your growing church growing you away from why you began in the first place?

I’m not saying the ground floor is your hidden issue, but it was a huge part of mine. And to some extent, it plays a role in most everyone’s reducing passion.

Here’s what I did (and it’s not going to blow your mind):

I tried to remove myself from only hearing stories of life change and inserted myself into places where life change was actually happening.

United Methodists Vote: No Same-Sex Weddings, No Gay Clergy

united methodist church
Screenshot from YouTube / @United Methodist Videos

Update: On the final day of the Special Session of the General Conference, the One Church Plan was officially voted down and the Traditional Plan was passed. Read our coverage of the final decision here.


Top leaders and representatives of United Methodist Churches around the world are meeting in St. Louis this week to put to rest a debate that has been occupying much time and resources and has already prompted some churches to leave the denomination. Preliminary voting in the Legislative Committee today indicates the denomination will adopt the Traditional Plan and continue its official, conservative stance toward homosexuality.

The One Church Plan Failed to Get the Votes It Needed

With a vote of 461 delegates in favor and 359 delegates against, the Traditional Plan will move on to a final vote tomorrow. However, the One Church Plan failed to pass the Legislative Committee after delegates voted 386 for and 436 against.

The Traditional Plan is favored by those in the church who wish to maintain a traditional view of marriage as being between one man and one woman. It also tightens restrictions on homosexuals who wish to serve as clergy members. Others that leaned toward allowing the church to perform same-sex weddings and ordaining openly homosexual clergy were in favor of the One Church Plan, which would allow individual churches to decide where they land on the issue of homosexual marriage and clergy.

Last year, the Council of Bishops recommended the denomination adopt the One Church Plan after it reviewed four potential plans developed by the UMC’s Committee on a Way Forward.

The global nature of the UMC has made the decision facing the denomination complicated. While listening to arguments for and against the One Church Plan, a delegate from South Congo stated the plan would “burn down the church in Africa.” Another delegate from northwest Russia articulated the plan would derail United Methodist missions in Eurasia.

Others, like delegate Byron Thomas, see the debate over homosexuality as similar in some ways to the struggle the denomination had with welcoming African Americans. “Why did black people stay in the Methodist Church? Because if the church could get it right, the world could get it right. The One Church Plan allows us to give witness to the world that we are a church who can struggle but stay together,” Thomas said.

As Pastor Adam Hamilton points out, the U.S. majority of the United Methodist Church is a little more progressive than their international peers.

What Is the Traditional Plan?

The Traditional Plan calls for retaining the church ban on ordination of “self-avowed practicing homosexuals,” as well as the prohibitions on clergy officiating same-sex weddings or churches hosting them. It would retain the church’s official position that the practice of homosexuality is incompatible with Christian teaching.

In addition, the Traditional Plan would call for greater enforcement of those restrictions including pushing out congregations and conferences into their own Methodist affiliations outside of the UMC if they won’t pledge to abide by church rules on homosexuality.

What Happens Now?

Tomorrow, the delegates are expected to participate in a final vote to either approve or reject the Traditional Plan. Since the One Church Plan did not make it out of committee, there is only a slim chance it could be brought forward for a vote again. Delegates will also be voting on petitions concerning churches that wish to leave the denomination.

The General Conference meets every four years to vote on issues concerning UMC churches across the globe. The conference is composed of almost 1,000 delegates that are elected by annual conferences to attend the General Conference. Half the delegates are lay members of UMC churches and half are clergy. It was decided at the last General Conference, in 2016, that a special session would be necessary in 2019 to settle the issue that has been threatening to divide the UMC for decades now.

Some churches left the denomination before this special session, however. Pastor Jeff Dunn of Christ United in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina, believes the elongated debate is evidence that the devil “has actually derailed a denomination.”

Korn’s Brian Welch on Why There Is No ‘Christian’ Look

brian welch
Screengrab Youtube @Uncommon

At the premier of Tim Tebow’s new film, Run the Race, Korn member Brian “Head” Welch critiqued the idea that there is a certain “look” all Christians need to have.

Nowhere in the Bible does it say you gotta start looking like everybody else… Suits are awesome. I’m not getting down [on that], but I want to be me now. Jesus always led me and said, “You be yourself,” and you don’t have to change into anything.

Welch has had quite an unusual journey toward meeting and walking with Jesus. As a founding member and guitarist for the successful nu metal band Korn, he experienced all the excesses of the rockstar life, including sex, drugs and being treated like he was superhuman. However, eventually his life spiraled out of control, and he became addicted to meth. Welch describes his addiction as “crippling” and says his lifestyle was destroying both him and his daughter. At some point during that period, his realtor shared a Bible verse with him and invited him to church. The verse was Matthew 11:28, which says, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”

Needing Rest

The verse resonated with Welch, and he went to church and accepted Christ there, but ended up taking meth again when he got home. He then prayed to Jesus to take away his addiction. When he prayed that prayer, he had a deep sense of God’s love for him. Following that experience, he got rid of all his drugs and quit playing in Korn.

Welch left the band in 2005 and struggled in his career for the next few years. He ended up rejoining Korn in 2012, something he believes God led him to do. He sees the time he was away from the band as a time of growth so he could be strong enough to return and share Christ in that environment. As Welch pointed out at the Run the Race premier, “Jesus hung out with—the fisherman, the prostitute, all kinds of people, and I fit right in that little group. That’s who He goes after and saves, He loves everybody. We’re a story but the thing is, He cleans us on the inside.”

While Welch doesn’t fit the mold of a what some might think a Christian looks like, he is honest about who he is. Welch believes authenticity is important, particularly to young people: “You gotta be real in this generation…this generation can smell a phony a mile away and so we got to be real and raw.”

‘The Beautiful Mystery of Christ’

“Real” and “raw” are qualities Welch aimed for in his documentary set to come out in June. The film tells his story, focusing on his relationship with his daughter. Welch describes the documentary as “a little edgy, just because we want the people that don’t know Christ to see a real story from the messy beginnings to what it is now.”

Christians might look very different from one another, says Welch, but Jesus is the one who unites us all. He says, “The beautiful mystery of Christ in you, that’s our identity, and so I can look like this…and all these nice guys in suits…it’s Christ in you, the hope of glory, and that’s what we all have in common.”

Only 3 of the 10 Churches Named by Greear Warrant Review, Executive Committee Says

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Over the weekend, the bylaws workgroup of the Southern Baptist Convention’s Executive Committee released a statement about President J.D. Greear’s call for reforms regarding child sexual abuse within the denomination’s churches. The committee urges a “deliberate and thoughtful response,” warning that churches shouldn’t be presumed guilty.

After the Houston Chronicle’s recent “Abuse of Faith” series about the SBC, Greear named 10 churches that need to “give assurance to the SBC that they have taken the necessary steps to correct their policies and procedures with regards to abuse and care for survivors.” He didn’t rule out removing congregations from fellowship with the Convention.

On February 18, Greear told the Executive Committee it was time “to own our error and to grieve for those who have been hurt.” Emphasizing victims’ safety, he added, “We need to regard any exposure, any shining of light on abuse, as our friend, even if it makes us ask some uncomfortable questions about ourselves publicly.”

Bylaws Workgroup Recommends an Amendment

According to a February 23 statement from the Executive Committee, it is recommending an amendment to the Convention’s constitution “affirming that the Convention does not, and will not, cooperate with a church that clearly evidences indifference to addressing the crime of sexual abuse.” The statement adds that “the Executive Committee did not intend for every allegation that a church has demonstrated indifference to establish guilt which would then have to be disproved—in effect, a presumption of guilt which the Executive Committee should view as untenable and unscriptural.”

Although the Executive Committee’s statement condemns the “abominable horror of child sexual abuse,” it warns that “our righteous anger” shouldn’t “prevent a deliberate and thorough response.” The statement continues:

The Convention, through its Executive Committee, should not disrupt the ministries of its churches by launching an inquiry until it has received credible information that the church has knowingly acted wrongfully in one of the four ways described in the proposed amendment: (a) employing a convicted sex offender, (b) allowing a convicted sex offender to work as a volunteer in contact with minors, (c) continuing to employ a person who unlawfully concealed from law enforcement info regarding the sexual abuse of any person by an employee or volunteer of the church, or (d) willfully disregarding compliance with mandatory child abuse reporting laws.

Bylaws Workgroup Reviews Dossier on the 10 Churches

At the workgroup’s request, Greear provided a dossier of information about the 10 churches he named. Although the workgroup emphasizes it doesn’t have “the authority nor ability to conduct a criminal investigation,” it tried to determine if there was “credible information that the church is evidencing indifference to sexual abuse in one of the four ways described in the proposed amendment.”

The workgroup listed each of the 10 churches Greear “publicly singled out,” indicating it believes further inquiry is warranted at three of them. The next step is sending those congregations letters of inquiry. Those congregations include Bolivar Baptist Church in  Sanger, Texas, Cathedral of Faith in Houston, Texas, and Sovereign Grace Church in Louisville, Kentucky.

The Executive Committee says it considered whether “factors such as the passage of time, changes in the church’s administration and membership, and the church’s adoption of policies to prevent abuse and properly respond to charges of abuse would make launching an inquiry of no value in addressing sexual abuse but only further harm a congregation recovering from the effects of crimes committed in its midst.”

The committee encourages victims to report crimes while urging people “to avoid publicly calling the names of churches without having documentation of criminal convictions and giving prior notice to the church.” It adds, “No individual possesses the authority to declare a church to be under a Convention inquiry of any kind.” The committee say it is “preferable and fairer” if the names of “suspect churches” are reported by “the local association and the state of regional convention.”

Reactions to the Statement Are Mixed

Reacting on Facebook to the statement, some people support how the Executive Committee “slapped Greear’s hand.” One writes: “It was grossly inappropriate and sinful for the president of the SBC to call out churches by name! Where is his brokenness over the pain he may have brought to these faithful congregations who now have to live with the fallout of his irresponsible behavior?” Others say the president did the denomination a service. “Greear merely provided an opportunity for these churches to publicly state that they’ve addressed the problem,” reads one comment.

Ashley Easter, founder of the Courage Conference, tweeted, “What a joke. Their four [criteria] are NOT good enough, not even close. Their investigation length and methods utterly lacking. Independent investigations needed!!”

Ken Alford, chairman of the SBC bylaws workgroup, says, “We understand it is difficult, if not impossible, to issue a report on sexual abuse that will be met with satisfaction by everyone. That is the reality of addressing an issue which has brought such pain, tragedy and hurt. But we remain committed to act on behalf of all individuals and churches who have been impacted by the horrific sin of sexual abuse.”

Trends in Churches: Five Reasons More Churches Are Moving From Vertical Growth to Horizontal Growth

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Two of the most dramatic trends in churches the past decade are declines in attendance frequency and the move to horizontal growth.

I have written and spoken at length about the trend of declining attendance frequency of “committed” church members. But I have not really unpacked why churches are moving toward horizontal growth.

Definitions are in order. Vertical growth refers to an increasing number in the same place or unit. For example, if a church has grown from 150 to 175 in attendance in its 10:30 worship service, it has a vertical growth of 25. The growth takes place in the same service.

Horizontal growth is the term we use to describe numerical growth that takes place by adding units. For example, if the church above decided to start a new worship service at 9:00 am, and total attendance of the 9:00 am and 10:30 am services grew to 225 from 175, we would say the growth of 50 was largely horizontal growth.

So why is growth more likely today with additional services, classes, groups, venues and campuses? Why do we see the horizontal strategy to be more pervasive today? Here are five key reasons:

  1. Horizontal growth is usually better stewardship. It is typically better to add a second worship service than to build a new worship center from a stewardship perspective. The church can accommodate more people without more capital expenses and debt.
  2. Horizontal growth can offer more choices to reach different demographics. As an example, a Tuesday night worship service may reach those people who have to work on Sunday mornings. Churches can often reach a wider demographic with more options.
  3. Horizontal growth reaches Gen X and the Millennials who typically prefer smaller gatherings. They like the resources of larger churches, but they also prefer the smaller gatherings of smaller churches. A larger church can get smaller through additional services, venues and sites.
  4. Horizontal growth can reach a new community without abandoning the church’s current community. Such is the advantage of an additional site or campus in another part of the community. One church, for example, is located in the suburbs, but had a heart to reach the urban core in the metropolitan area. It leased an old warehouse and started reaching a large slice of the unchurched urban population.
  5. Horizontal growth often has many of the advantages of church planting without planting a new church. Many of these examples could be accomplished with a church plant. But starting something brand new without the resources of an existing church is challenging. Horizontal growth can sometimes capture the benefit of both worlds.

Is horizontal growth a prescriptive strategy for churches? I don’t think so. I see it more as a descriptive reality. And I will be watching this trend closely to see if more people are reached with the gospel. Then I will get really excited about it.

This article originally appeared here.

Why Bereans Would Have Notepads in Their Pews Instead of Bibles

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OK, a Berean wouldn’t have actually had a pew. And they certainly didn’t have individual copies of complete Bibles. Nor did they have .79 notebooks from the supermarket. But I’m convinced that if you transported a Berean into our 21st century setting they would use their notebooks at the gathered assembly far more than they would use their Bibles.

So, be a good Berean and see if I’m right.

A Berean is one akin to those described in Acts 17:10-15. There we read that these noble Jews “received the word with all eagerness” as they were “examining the Scriptures daily to see if these things were so.” In other words they didn’t simply receive the missionaries’ words just because they said them, they dug into the Scriptures. But that’s not really the highlight of the passage. What marked the Bereans apart from the Jews in Thessalonica wasn’t merely that they examined the Scriptures. It was that, unlike those in Thessalonica, they eagerly received the Word.

And yet almost every time I read an article or hear a talk on being a good Berean the majority of the focus is on the examining. “Good Bereans examine what is said by the Scriptures.” Yes, absolutely. But good Bereans cannot examine without first eagerly receiving. And that is why I say I believe if these dear saints were transported to the 21st century they’d be delighted not only to have printed Bibles but also those .79 notebooks. They wouldn’t just have tattered pages on their Bibles. They would have leaf upon leaf of paper filled with notes from eagerly receiving the word.

What Luke is highlighting here in the work among the Bereans isn’t simply their faithfulness in fact checking. This isn’t an advertisement for Snopes, it’s an advertisement for the Spirit; the Spirit who opens up blind eyes and creates an eagerness (an excitement) to hear this wonderful news about Jesus. This is what the gospel does. It creates an optimism grounded in love that believes and hopes deeply. The Spirit causes the renewed heart to leap for joy at even bread crumbs left by Jesus.

A Berean does what he/she does because the Spirit has created within them a deep-seated faith that God graciously speaks—even through donkeys and preachers. A Berean believes that when someone opens up God’s Word for us it is an act of grace and they eagerly receive this gift. But they also do not do it blindly. Because they also believe that God is consistent and that God doesn’t lie. So Bereans also examine.

After the sermon could you tell the preacher what he just told you?

So this is going to sound anti-Berean, but maybe consider putting down your Bible and picking up pen and paper the next time you hear a sermon. Expect that God is going to speak to you. Look for the feast or even the crumbs. Take such good notes that you could tell the preacher his main points and the big point he was aiming for that day.

Now, some of us preachers might struggle with being clear and concise. We might make this an impossible job for our congregants. If we cannot accurately say what the sermon is to be about before we preach it, then we likely aren’t doing our people much good. But I’m going to assume that most preachers at least have a decent aim of what they hope their congregation receives from this preached word. And a faithful Berean is going to eagerly receive this word by taking notes and doing everything possible to really understand what this word is, and she is doing this so that she can examine it.

Does your posture on Sunday morning look like a kid receiving a pack of underpants from grandma or a kid who just received a new video game console?

Smiles and Sharpee’s. A tear and a Thayer’s. A lexicon with a laugh. A convicted heart that checks the concordance. That is the Berean. Not one with an open Bible and a critical heart whose posture reeks of “prove it.”

So, that’s why I think Bereans would have their notepads open more than their Bibles when the Word is being preached.

Now be a Berean and see if I’m right.

This article originally appeared here.

6 Reasons Ministry Is Harder Than It Used to Be

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6 Reasons Ministry Is Harder Than It Used to Be

Ever feel like ministry is harder than it was a decade ago?

You’re not alone.

I am an eternal optimist when it comes to the church, but I agree that ministry is more challenging than it’s ever been.

Understanding why is key to figuring out what to do and how to respond.

You may or may not like the change in culture you see around you, but the fastest path to ineffectiveness in the church is to ignore the change you see around you.

So why is ministry a little more challenging than it used to be?

Here are six reasons … and a beacon of hope to guide us into a better future.

1. The automatic return to church is over.

There was an assumption in ministry (it still lingers in certain circles) that although young adults who grew up in the church might walk away for a season, they’ll come back as soon as they have kids.

The research shows that’s just not true.

Ditto the assumption that unchurched people will turn to the church the moment they hit a bit crisis in their lives.

Unchurched people think about church about as much as the average Christian thinks about synagogue—rarely.

Will you occasionally have people who turn to the church in times of crisis? Of course. Or young families who come back? Absolutely.

But if you treat the exception like the rule, you’ll be deeply frustrated with your inability to realize your mission of reaching people with the Gospel.

2. The gap between what Christians believe and the culture believes is bigger.

If you’ve sensed that the values many Christians hold are significantly different than the values our culture holds to, you would be right.

What Christians believe about sexuality, money, love, drugs, ethics and compassion are increasingly different from what our neighbors who don’t go to church believe.

So how do you bridge that gap?

Too many preachers just yell at the world for not believing what we believe. Ditto for Christians on social media.

Not only is that a mistake; it’s a terrible strategy.

Guess what: Christians are supposed to be different than non-Christians. It shouldn’t surprise us that it’s happened.

Sharing why we believe what we believe in love is a far more effective strategy than yelling at the world in hate.

In a few weeks on my Leadership Podcast, I’ll be interviewing David Kinnaman, President of Barna Research, on how Christians should interact with a changing culture.

To make sure you don’t miss the conversation, you can subscribe to the podcast for free.

Kids Worship: Why Lyrics Matter

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Kids Worship: Why Lyrics Matter

We all know singing is great tool for memorization. You may not have heard a childhood song for 10 years, but as soon as the tune hits your ears, the words come flooding back.

According to Dr. Roediger, who was interviewed by the Wall Street Journal on a piece titled Why Does Music Aid in Memorization, this has to do with how our brains handle information. Dr. Roediger explains that the “areas in the brain associated with memory…process millions of pieces of information every day. Getting the information into those areas is relatively easy. What is difficult is pulling data out efficiently. Music provides a rhythm, a rhyme and, often, alliteration. All that structure is the key to unlocking information stored in the brain—with music acting as a cue.” So we can think of data as constantly being locked behind “doors” in our brains, and music is a key that quickly unlocks those doors. It’s simple. Put words you want to memorize to music, and you’ll more easily remember them. 

This is why when writing worship songs for kids, we must be careful about the lyrics. Some kids’ brains will unlock them quickly. Others will need to hear a song a dozen times before they can easily access the words. But because music is a cue for retrieving phrases, we want our lyrics about God to be as accurate as possible! 

Start With Scripture

This is why when writing, we start with Scripture. Scripture that we have studied, wrestled with, lived out and believe. If you study the lyrics of the songs on Only Jesus, you’ll see they are rooted in the Word of God.

  • “I Found a Treasure” comes from Matthew 13:44-46.
  • “King of Everything” uses themes from Psalms, Matthew (the Lord’s Prayer) and Revelation.
  • “Rescue for my Soul” was based on the story of Jonah.
  • Jesus Forever” references several Scripture passages in the first verse alone:
    • Before there was time, You were up in the highest place (Colossians 1:17)
    • Leaving Your home, You came down to make a way (Philippians 2:7-8)
    • There was nobody else, no other Name can save (Acts 4:12)
    • You’ve stolen our hearts and given us everything (2 Peter 1:3)
    • We want to lift You higher (Psalm 145:1)

Scripture must be primary. It must be foundational. We must behold it for what it is: God’s very words, breathed out for us, given to show us who God is and to transform us to be more like Jesus. When we see Scripture for what it is, we have no choice but to start with it when writing. Then, as our listeners sing the melodies we composed that unlock the lyrics we wrote, we can rejoice that they are learning true things about God, not just lines that happened to rhyme, or lyrics we thought were clever.

Let’s keep in mind that these kids need spiritual nutrition, and catchy, theologically sound songs that are rooted in Scripture is one way to provide them with that. Anna Sargeant

Think about it. Peter tells believers to crave spiritual milk, so they might grow up in their salvation (1 Peter 2:2). The children who believe in Jesus in our ministry are still so young in their faith. Let’s not be irresponsible and give them the sugary soda equivalent of worship songs: songs that might be fun and entertaining but have no theological substance. Let’s keep in mind that these kids need spiritual nutrition, and catchy, theologically sound songs that are rooted in Scripture is one way to provide them with that. Finally, let’s pray that the Lord will use this music not only to help kids memorize truths about God, but also to stir in them a deep affection for the Truth, our Rescuer, Jesus Christ.

Check out more resources for Kids Worship at OnlyJes.us.

This article originally appeared here.

Small Groups Are Not One-Size-Fits-All

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Small Groups Are Not One-Size-Fits-All

Instruction manuals are good things. Whether you’re putting together a bicycle for a kid, installing a stove in a kitchen or even putting together a 5,000 piece Lego set with your son, you’re going to be better off in the long run if you actually read the directions. Much repentance later can be avoided by reading the manual earlier. But if you’re trying to lead small groups or helping others to do so, instruction manuals only get you so far.

That’s because small groups are not “one size fits all.” Sure, it would be simpler if leading a group came with a simple checklist to complete, but the reason that doesn’t work is because small groups are not made up of Lego pieces. They’re made up of people. And each of those people in the group brings their own preferences, previous experiences and personal expectations into that group environment.

If you’ve ever led more than one group, you can testify to the truth of that statement. As a leader, you’ll likely hear things like, “We didn’t do it this way in my last group,” or “We don’t seem as close as my other group was,” or “You don’t teach the way my last leader did.” If a group leader isn’t prepared for this reality, statements like that can cause them to wonder if they’re really doing anything valuable at all.

However, if leaders are set up from the beginning to know that the dynamics of a group are always going to be unique to that given group, they can not only withstand statements like that but can actually flourish inside an environment that ebbs and flows. How, then, can group leaders be equipped to embrace the reality that small groups are not one size fits all? Here are three ways:

1. Be a student of your group.

Every group needs a leader, someone designated to teach the class or guide the discussion. But part of being a leader is also being a student. From day one in that group, the leader must be committed to learning the dynamics that uniquely exist inside it.

• Is there someone prone to dominate the conversation every week?

• What kinds of questions work best?

• Are there particular life situations that are going to require more care from the group than others?

• Are there people who are likely to fade into the background if they’re not encouraged?

When the group leader intentionally becomes a student of their group, they can learn to adjust their approach to leadership based on the dynamics presented in that group.

2. Build margin into your agenda.

It is possible, for a group leader, to be so committed to their own agenda that they actually miss great opportunities for ministry right in front of them. Part of leading a group is preparing to lead the group, but in our preparation, we would be wise to not so overload our expectations for the group that there’s no room for the movement of the Holy Spirit. Why not instead, as a leader, assume that something will come up that is unforeseen? Why not assume there will be an opportunity to pause the presentation of content or the discussion and gather around a person and pray for a few minutes? When we pack out the group meeting agenda until it’s overflowing, we’ll always leave frustrated because we didn’t get to something. Meanwhile, our group members will leave not having had the chance to perhaps receive what they needed most.

3. Use a flexible tool for content.

One of the most important pieces of a small group is the content. What are you going to circle around? How is the Word of God going to be presented? If small groups are not one size fits all, then why not use a tool that allows for content to be adjusted according to the dynamics of an individual group?

At smallgroup.com, you can not only build Bible studies based on a text or topic, you can fully customize those studies to fit each individual group. In fact, at no extra cost, every leader of a group can change and customize their own group leader guide to further make it fit their group. You can actually try out smallgroup.com for free for two weeks right now; just head there and click “get started.”

People are not one size fits all. Therefore, small groups are not one size fits all. Instead of trying to jam a bunch of square pegs into round holes, why not accept the great variety that exists inside the family of God and celebrate the uniqueness of those groups?  

This article originally appeared here.

7 Suggestions for a Pastor and Spouse to Find True Friends

thank you notes for children’s ministry volunteers

It is a challenge for a pastor and spouse to find true friends. People talk. People gossip. People love to share what they hear.

That’s true about what they hear from a pastor too.

If the pastor talks about his personal life, shares a concern—heaven forbid, shares a sin or weakness—people talk.

I’ve personally been burned several times by trusting the wrong people with information. It’s wonderful to think that a pastor can be totally transparent with everyone, but honestly, especially in some churches, complete transparency will cause you to lose your ministry.

Every pastor knows this well. So, most pastors don’t talk.

And the sadder fact is, because of this dynamic, many a pastor and spouse have very few true friends.

Frankly, it’s made many in the ministry among the most lonely of people I have ever known. I was in the business community for many years and I didn’t know business leaders as “closed” to people getting to know them as some pastors seem to be. I wish it weren’t true, but it is.

Of course, Jesus is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. And that’s true. But we would never tell our congregation they don’t need human friends. Most of our churches are built around a reality that everyone needs community.

Hopefully our spouse is our best friend. That should be our goal. But the truth is, a pastor and spouse need more.

We need other—same sex—friends who can walk with us through life. I need men in my life that understand the unique struggles and temptations of being a man. Pastors need community too, just as we would encourage our church to live life together with others.

I’m happy to report that I have some of those types of friends in my life. I have some friends with whom I can share the hard stuff and they still love me. I have some friends with whom I can be myself. I’m thankful for friends that build into me as much as I build into them.

Every pastor and spouse needs them.

And here’s the other side—so does the pastor’s spouse. They need friends just as much, but have equal concerns and struggles to find them. Over the years, my wife has realized the hard way that some people were only her friends because of her position as my wife. They wanted information and access—more than they wanted friendship.

And some who are not in ministry will read this post and think I’m over-reacting. They’ll say everyone deals with this at some level. They may be right. (Not about the over-reacting, but about the fact that everyone deals with it.) But I know having been on both sides—in ministry and out of ministry—this issue is more real to me now than previously.

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